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Please be advised that this written work is theory. It's theorizing, pondering and amateur research. For legal reasons I state that I have no actual belief in these theories as fact, if I did I would have sought legal recourse. Until that occurs this blog can only be considered theory. If it does then any and all actions PAST AND FUTURE that have been taken against me during the years producing this work will be labeled war crimes under international law and any other legal protections that apply.
I am a writer, an activist and artist. I claim my RIGHT TO EXIST legally under US Constitution and international law.

This is an educational blog for awareness as well as sometimes a telling of candid personal experiences to demonstrate theories as they might be experienced by a person who theoretically is existing under such conditions. Thus the 'candid' expression, poetic license and marketing myself as product or character. This is NOT a journal or diary.
Being a reasonable person of sound mind if I had concerns for my safety or others I would take responsible action for self care as my established medical history can demonstrate.
Any actions taken against me by others questioning my sanity or competence based on my produced work will be construed as activist/dissident intimidation and whistle blower retaliation and proper legal action will be taken against you by my family and support system.

Be warned that no further interference with my production of meaningful work as an artist and activist will be tolerated.

Saturday, November 28, 2015

Why I Dont Trust My Doctor-But Feel I Have To Compromise To Get Well-Then Get Out

Ive always needed to stay to get health issues dealt with then I keep saying I can finally leave the US-and the Native Genocide behind.


My liver started to hurt in ways it never had last year in Austin. Maybe it was multiple scary brushes with spider venom or getting weird creepy pollution in my clothing from Baytown TX. Exxon Mobile's stronghold on the town is their chemical plant there. Something got into my overalls..or was in them from purchasing them from Baytown-and it made my liver hurt in a new awful way. It seemed. (The town is so owned that the hospital seems the worst Ive ever seen-my theory being that if a resident or employee complains of chemical plant related illness...its covered by the shills working at the hospital.

As a TI you get to see all the corruption present first hand. Becuz they dont care-yer targeted. No one listens anyway and their job consists of erasing, denying or covering wrongdoing for some corrupt power to begin with.


I guess harassing TIs is part of the payment plan.


It has been accompanied by weakness and tiredness. It feels like the organ itself is being damaged.


Interestingly just as Im getting seriously ill science has made progress and one of the reasons I put up with this city is becuz you cant beat the hospitals here.


In years past Id been harassed badly but some hospitals did end up taking care of my medical needs. BMC was ok until about 2011 then it was over. They turned.


Id never consider going to MGH after what they did during Bush and how connected they were (and are obviously to MK Ultra).

Brigham and Womens has always been tentative and when an ex friend had her kids there, after that security would just shoo me away (she is important locally).


Tufts always took care of me before the Bush years but docs became cruel after that time and I knew to stay away. Looking back that wasnt the best either.


Tufts is Tufts U.

BMC is BU.

Harvard is-
HMS Affiliates:
Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center
Boston Children's Hospital
Brigham and Women's Hospital
Cambridge Health Alliance
Dana-Farber Cancer Institute
Harvard Pilgrim Health Care Institute
Hebrew SeniorLife
Joslin Diabetes Center
Judge Baker's Children's Center
Massachusetts Eye and Ear
Massachusetts General Hospital
McLean Hospital
Mount Auburn Hospital
Spaulding Rehabilitation Hospital
VA Boston Healthcare System

So where are you supposed to go? If institutions are MK Ultra connected what can you do?

My mother would make a kurt comment about "Boston doctors!" in a short rant always the answer as to why I was getting shitty treatment whenever something would happen.
I never understood what she meant but with understanding being TIs and MK Ultra experimentees IT MAKES SENSE NOW.
Her solution was decent just not explained well. 'Boston doctors' are inevitably all going to be connected to an institution thats up to no good with classified level black project and mad scientist levels of shenanigans.

Just becuz these people study to be docs doesnt mean its for the most novel motives. Money and status and cover for predator behaviors come to mind.
And of course what mater and pater expect of you.

Many did stand by 'First Do No Harm' but some did not..and not all out of pure fear.

So I chose the hospital that did the least harm during the early Bush years. And the harassment has been minimal until the last few years.

I would even have some professors happy to meet me. Probably this was before the pressure really came on a few years ago.

No one wants to know you then.

Often doctors would minimize my pain like from old surgical scars etc and I never understood it.

I just met my new liver doc.
The appointment is in Newton not Boston. I got perped from the street to the building to the doc office.

The doc was fine UNTIL I stated my liver hurt in the past year. Usually my condition is more other issues with the liver much more subtle.

I also said that I dont take Tylenol becuz  I was told its not good for the liver AND IT HURTS metabolizing through it. Thats what made me get clean decades ago in part. I could no longer process the toxins in street drugs.
If I drank which I tried to later- I felt like a week long blow out in my younger years. Just a drink or two.

So I stopped smoking-everything. I also took herbal pills until I got allergic reaction condition from Bactrim in 2009.

Broccoli, lemon juice and artichoke hearts will repair it if it feels really bad.

But this woman kept saying EXACTLY what a Tufts doctor would say about my old surgery scars:
Me: They or it hurts.
Doc: It shouldnt
Me: But it does
Doc: But it shouldn't.

Then she ended this with  A GESTURING TACTIC that was so damn awkward and obvious. I ignored it and pressed forward explaining how toxins and Tylenol hurt as they go through this organ. And my concern lately is that it hurts worse than that but without any food or medicine ingested being a culprit.

She countered with saying she has no explanation for that. Then went on to state how safe Tylenol is in small amounts with liver disease.

Im thinking that at this point everyone is just trying to make sure theres nothing present in medical records for a nice fat pain and suffering charge in a lawsuit or war crimes charge.

Thats why MT AUBURN sat right in front of me when I was going thru mild but alarming anaphylaxis when I got bitten by a white spider in Harvard Sq circa like 2010 or so. (Sat on the median with the statue. No humans usually so lots more critters.)
Not only did the venom put me on a 8 hour acid like trip mildly but they had to treat me for Benadryl overdose (which was prob why my anaphylaxis was so mild by the time I felt it was out of my control to go to an ER.)

Im genuinely worried this time. Im getting weird premonitions of death due to my liver.
Like its liver cancer or something and they are going to try to hide it so I get sick enough to die and MAKE IT LOOK RANDOM.

Homeless people die right? That sort of set up.

I am thinking just get the damn pills off the bitch and get my liver cured then just ditch everything about this place thats so determined to kill me off or deny me the right to exist.

Strange its yet another Russian doctor. The psychologist at St Elizabeths Medical Center in Brighton who intimidated me into NOT going to a hypnotist when I started recalling memories was Russian also.

I might request someone else as I dont need this crap when Im seriously afraid of death here-which I usually am not but when you have a degenerating organ....mother Nature starts preparing you.  Thats what I dont like about it.

A little too much feeling light on me a bit too much feeling a dead heavy sense of peace.

I dont like it. Im starting to nest alone a lot. Like be away from people. Like Im 'preparing' for some transition of the spirit and body.

My life force is low.

So play time is over with these medical people becuz I am not quite ready to sail off to wherever on the ship that takes you there.

This could be why Im increasingly psychic. Im there, right?  One foot in already. It could also be just what Nature does for an older female whos ill as a method of self defense against predators.

Im even suspect they are going to lie about tests and claim Im fine.
Which has been one too many times with this new resident PCP.

I guess the hospital that did the least harm is perhaps out to do the most.




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