Spirit in Black

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Please be advised that this written work is theory. It's theorizing, pondering and amateur research. For legal reasons I state that I have no actual belief in these theories as fact, if I did I would have sought legal recourse. Until that occurs this blog can only be considered theory. If it does then any and all actions PAST AND FUTURE that have been taken against me during the years producing this work will be labeled war crimes under international law and any other legal protections that apply.
I am a writer, an activist and artist. I claim my RIGHT TO EXIST legally under US Constitution and international law.

This is an educational blog for awareness as well as sometimes a telling of candid personal experiences to demonstrate theories as they might be experienced by a person who theoretically is existing under such conditions. Thus the 'candid' expression, poetic license and marketing myself as product or character. This is NOT a journal or diary.
Being a reasonable person of sound mind if I had concerns for my safety or others I would take responsible action for self care as my established medical history can demonstrate.
Any actions taken against me by others questioning my sanity or competence based on my produced work will be construed as activist/dissident intimidation and whistle blower retaliation and proper legal action will be taken against you by my family and support system.

Be warned that no further interference with my production of meaningful work as an artist and activist will be tolerated.

Friday, December 31, 2010

Method of Inducing Self Destruction as well as Behavior Mod Tool

This post deals with methods used on TI's to induce acting out in self destructive ways as well as a behavior modification tool.

Article from Antiquity: Getting Rid of Inconvenient People

Getting Rid Of Inconvenient People. And article from antiquity about the process of being 'cast out'.
It sound exactly like what we call 'gang stalking'.!via/oucontent/course/79/a218_reading_11-3.pdf+getting+rid+of+inconvenient+people&hl=en&gl=us&pid=bl&srcid=ADGEESjSQ1WOSxk1C7rrEep0Yrm2tx30_AARAPAL77x3PAe77Ri2WakKE3G3XoSB677cFDLk2s6UHDmoedqo-H7V7g69Y8vJHhhZsuyktW5eSxM5MOuWk6HMRW6llUMUwKaCaj_cRry1&sig=AHIEtbQnEWR2zP5vMUwR2zaFEG8kkmaq9Q
I see now the futility of what I am doing.

Around 10 minutes ago I awoke from a nap to find I felt a feeling of people making merry, the way I used to when I had a life before all of this.
This most likely means that there is some method of influence going on from this area human or tech that is very much responsible for coloring my mood and my lack of focus here. Becuz I am getting more confused, more depressed, more overwhelmed by memories and more feeling fucked over staying in this area than any where else.

Also I am finding it hard to leave this area as usual and I keep getting hit with quick visions of UMass.

I find it almost impossible to focus on getting doctors appointments made for my health issues of which three are badly in need of attention. I also am finding it difficult to focus on getting any sort of lawyer to see if there is any recourse in any of what has been done to me.

Its interesting that I am so managed. Its especially difficult when I am walking outside and seems to subside lately when I get indoors, of course this being a holiday the conditions of being targeted are most likely easier to deal with as I dont believe the system has as much power during holidays purely due to lack of manpower.

I also realize as of right now that I have been manipulated to the point where no one is going to believe me. Most people dont want to know or wont get into contact with my work, so why am I bothering and continuing to insist on writing a book or any actions? Why can I not get a lawyer or other such actions but I am always encouraged to give up information such as telling my story by writing a book or in desperation- in a video?

Not enough people are going to see this or understand my situation to help me anyway. The people who got over on me or helped manipulate me like Jake, Julie and my mother, key people and anyone else who knows I am not mentally ill have moved on and this whole project is useless. Everyone is going to disavow knowledge of what they did and keep the rewards they have from thier part in it.

My mother will agree that I am mentally ill like Danny and probably by now has 'lost' her records documenting her as a radiation experimentee connected to MK Ultra (look at her phone records if you really want the truth). Other things will be used to prove her correct.

I will continue to be segregated and ignored in society even though I am not mentally ill but a victim of manipulation.

Its overwhelming when so many people in a nationwide population seems to want you to stay down or to not get any justice.

How can that many people be involved? People who work in jobs where they are supposed to be helping people? That is the hardest thing about this fight is one cannot BELIEVE that people employed in medical, EMT, social services would be that cruel. Its unbelievable really. And to have clear memories of the truama of encountering that is what drives one truly crazy over the years.

This area has a hold on me far too much of a mental hold.If I stay here I will experience nothing but more behavior modification in the direction most beneficial to the system.

No one is going to believe me anyway just like my mother said.

Look at my life. I am still being abused and kept down and its New Year's Eve- I should be going to parties looking nice and having fun. Instead I live a life of being tortured every day. No one wants to admit that there is a NWO happening. People have basically been shocked out of reality and re-immersed in a very false reality akin to a prison but people do not want to see that.

This area is so thorough in managing me mentally that its impossible to live outside of its control. It does not surprise me this area is so heavily managed as its probably feared as one of the places that would have fought the NWO moreso than other areas of the country. Also there are valuable resources here and mind as well that must be controlled at all costs.
It makes sense to manage this area to heavy handedly.

Interestingly a few days ago I was looking at the MA state flag hanging on an entrance to the actual rails of the train, green line Copley. day after Xmas trying to find something open, somewhere to go. (biggest problem for homeless is that on holidays and sundays we have no where to go,these days are not fun for us.)

I looked at the shield with the native american on it for a bit and then realized that the blue shield looked like a police symbol. As it came into focus, the similarity, I felt alot of the effects of the remote influence fade away. The moment that I had a strong connection with the idea of the state police here in MA. Its like much of the influence lost its power and believe me, this place manages me into the ground basically moreso than any other state or area.
true there is lots of emotional connections and baggage here to manipulate, but its something else.

And so I believe that alot of this is being perpetrated by the state police, probably in the interest of higher ups. ANd of course during the federal investigation, the state cops as well as other factions were directly involved.

More Brainwashing About Police Culture

Thursday, December 30, 2010

Tactics being pulled due to today's post

I came back to Harv Sq and on my way to where I stay I saw this kid that works the late shift at that hostel where so much sick sh*t happened during the height of the harassment. He was in front of 7-11. He was looking right in my direction so I know that he saw me first long before I saw him AND he was looking RIGHT INTO MY EYES out of the corner of his eyes. He did not look suprised to see me as he was already looking at me. As he looked into my eyes he immediately turned away upon me recognizing him and shot right away from the store and towards the corner. He heard me say hey, I know he did. And he walked away with the gait of someone who was in control and determined to follow through not someone who was surprised by seeing me and turned quickly without planning.

First off I never see this kid out here in this area EVER.

Also my last post on seeing Kim was probably what brought this on. It was total intimidation.

Its purpose is to either re-silence me becuz seeing Kim broke through literally years of brainwashing to keep me silent and locked into madness.

Also it might be, all of this happening to get me to finally 'confess' information.

I am getting comments from readers who are pushing for me to name names and all that.

The problem with this situation is that my being a Survivor of high level programming I know that what has been done to me over the years is a continued attempt to use MK Ultra methods to gain confession as programmed people carry information in compartments within thier programming system so therefore they do not respond to normal forms of torture or techniques to gain confession.

For years I have seen this go on. In San Francisco about 2006 I was really being targeted and still had not learned it was gang stalking. I had left MA on a road trip to get away from everything especially Scott who was so abusive. Of course now I recount it as very much that I was targeted into that reaction.
When I was in Frisco I broke down and really felt I couldn't handle the situation. I went to get a 'rest' in a facility. I went to a police station within the city to find a facility. Before I even made contact with the officer within he looked as if he was expecting me. It was really creepy. He had this arrogance about the situation as if it was going to be just easy as pie to get the results he thought was coming next.
When I asked for the location of a hospital opposed to whatever other result he expected his composure broke and his face turned from someone in control of a covert activity to someone who's face cracked like a plate on the floor. His jaw almost dropped.

It was, and is, one of the few most satisfying moments of my life being a TI.

The police are so heavily in on this its ridiculous. Why they of all factions should have such power or should be privvy to the workings of such covert activities is beyond me. They are so innately corrupt, arrogant and violent that I cannot imagine anything good coming of such a set up.

Unless of course somehow its connected on some spiritual or level I cant see. I did see a statue once of St Michael in a police station. I suppose there is a connection considering they are essentially a military faction and culture.

That detective in Waltham who I recognize as being involved with my family, who greeted me last time I went into that neighborhood, he also knew much more than he was letting on.
The man who worked for Waltham cab who used to park his livery car outside my family's home around Oct 2006 to engage in harassment and gang stalking, a retired cop, he also was part of this. So many police, in marked cars and otherwise are involved in this that one just shutters to think of thier part in the big picture. So, they know all about mind control and actively harass Survivors? On who's behalf? They obviously know what they are doing as they have engaged in such actions from the mid 90's onward.

That cop in Frisco, you cant tell me that he did not expect me to come crying in there and confess something wether it was a false confession or telling everything I know about everyone I know. Its exactly what the arrogant bastard expected.

This is very suspect as there are many more people connected to Jake, Julie and my mother who know much more about thier activities than I ever did. And besides considering those three people either pay off the cops or kiss thier asses like my mother for instance (ah, the benefits of managing pedophile families in the community. Happens every time in every community) or help them in thier little frame up attempts (Jake) then the cops and thier detectives know all the info they would need anyway. So why is it so important to get me to confess anything.

You have to remember this is about mind control not confession, not information, not any real investigation not anything other THAN mind control.
I almost walked into the Brighton police station with false confessions right around the same time as Mark Carr did the same in confessing to Jon Benet's murder. This means it was experimentation, and exercise in using this system to see if false confession can be induced by such methods. Also, most of the posts have been pulled now, but many people including myself took on look at Carr's interviews and highly suspected he was programmed. Myself included. If that is so, hes a prime candidate for experimentation of this kind as that is what I myself experienced around the same time frame.

Wether he is a pedo is not pertinent here. Plenty of programmed people who are survivors of abuse become active abusers, coming from that backround and all. Mark Carr if he is programmed probably doesnt even know what or who he is, if that is indeed the case. He has also complained of harassment by police in various locations.
And its covered up by the public thinking 'oh he deserves to be harassed for life becuz he's _________'..whatever.
That might be sensible under normal truly random circumstances but the fact is that many Survivors of mind control especially programming that depended on sexual abuse to create fragmented alter systems are going to be Targeted. Targeted does not mean you are under surveillance becuz you are an offender of some kind or have done something society deems unfit and never been caught officially so you deserve it. It means you are singled out. Among all the pedos in the world, why Mark Carr?

Of all the people in my crowd of friends or circle of drug dealers, career criminals and drugged out heiresses, was I targeted to be destroyed, exploited or driven to confession? Me being poor is just another load of bullshit, another part of false flag operations. Another excuse.

People are targeted not becuz of what they do or who they are that is obvious to outsiders. They are targeted becuz of things so sensitive and delicate in nature that they must be handled as such.

Its been put on the internet that Mark Karr now has a cult of some kind of a following. Its really sick too according to his ex. So...why would a system meant to supposedly target immoral people for justice make Mark Karr MORE famous and in turn MORE powerful? Becuz the people behind this are not doing those things for justice. that is a front. They do it for power, profit, favors, to avoid exposure or to play games with other people's lives. They also inadvertently or directly support pedo networks, prostitution, drug operations, money laundering and of course mind control and unethical human experimentation.

Why the cops would need me to confess, the only reasonable motive for that is to make me into a rat so that I when I am killed then its easy to write off the motive.
It is an old trick to get rid of MK Ultra and programming survivors who know too much.

This little game tonight could have all been planned even that moron Kim from NA showing up. If not then that little brush off from the hostel employee was even more probable.

The problem here is to judge wether they are so weak as a network that they are trying to keep me quiet or if they are very strong as a psy ops unit of sorts and are trying to manipulate me into full confession.

I have readers telling me I need to confess everything, name names or write my book and get a radio show. I have ideations all the time about getting a radio show. Its all bullsh*t really and its so obvious.

The whole concept of making a video to name names has been being pushed one way or another for years now.

Looking at the situation it seems very important to get a confession not only to prove MK Ultra does indeed work on programmed assets or persons to gain confession but as a key step in behavior modification/cult mind control brainwashing. To break a person down into confession is one of the greatest steps in forced deprogramming as well as brainwashing.

What they seem to not want is for me to quietly and privately write a book that is tasteful and does not name names and I finally have something to support myself with financially.

THAT seems most unacceptable. It seems they want all this information for free on a videotape. Nice, easy, free and at the expense of me risking my safety further as well as my life its being hinted at. Which is what is expected from mind controlled slaves all thier lives.

getting me to do such a thing, especially publicly would be the ultimate power trip for everyone involved as well as would be the ultimate and final move of control over me handed over to the system. They know this. They know that my betraying my entire life on some video tape so publicly is the ultimate in relinquishing privacy, secrecy and anything else that allows me to have any power remaining over my own life and affairs.

The manner if which I have been treated over time with such arrogance and cruelty usually to gain the same ends tells me that I have no status in the US and probably any other country I would live in. The US has never treated me well. I have never had a fair deal in the USA. I have no rights in the USA. I have been tortured in the USA. I have been exploited, lied to and manipulated by people who are supposed to enforce law and uphold justice in the USA.

Which means that there is no trusting any authority in the USA nor anything they appear to desire cannot be good for me or my case or my safety. Without a lawyer who is indeed serving my best interest and not corrupt I would be a most reasonable person if I did not 'confess' on a video tape like an animal who has been beaten into submission.

Becuz that is what this is really about.

That kid from the hostel can do as he likes. Fuck that whole place. I remember everything they did to me and thier attitudes were that I was a poor piece of sh*t who does not matter in the big scheme of things. that i am expendable. Actually I clearly recall that very same kid saying "fuck you" under his breath early on in these games when it was obvious I was losing to being beaten down by this whole situation.

The little games of pleasantries we all play together as social lube in the day to day world are necessary to walk through peace time moments smoothly and with civility. However I never stopped being at war and my video camera of a mind recalls all details of what was said to me, what was done to me, when where and how. And I can go into that hostel and act stupid or pleasant as if I have forgotten just as they can obviously do the same.

Stop sending children out to do a man's job. Its a joke just like it always was. a bunch of rich kids from some hostel managed by a fat black dude who likes white meat and a creepy Latin with a rude cleaning staff that speak no English and act like thier having to clean is the hardest job in the world (lazy bitches) is no match for high level programming. Nor that WASP old guy who owns the place.

But if you insist on still believing that due to my being obviously so ruined by this system you keep thinkin that. This area is so hung up on believing this is about Julie or Jake and his little music industry jerk off friends that they are blind to the fact that I was programmed before the age of 6 in the early 70's long before knowing any of those people. Its always been about targeting ME, not those morons. those two are so whipped by the people that fund them they are down for life and will NEVER get up again. It may seem they live successful lives but they always got what they wanted by going ass up to some pay off or controlling authority figure.

Such is the moral weakness of rich people. They dont have the balls to tell abusive, corrupt authority to f*ck off due to being controlled by the money. And I am supposed to fear THAT.


No matter what I do however I will be mistreated and perceived as weak and helpless just like my Arab friend that the FBI abused in order to recruit him.. These f*ckers dont respect anything but money or power and that includes power in numbers.

The person is forever seen as someone who was never rich or strong enough to protect themselves.

and not enough people know about this system to protect people like me which is why its so hard to cope.

The only people who know who you are are the people who hate you, dont respect you and fear you only. Therefore they have ultimate power over you with no factions to rival that.

Which means its stand alone for life. Which is fine with me but I am not going to take action based on a bunch of stupid kids playing games.

Kim was so not prepared for what occured that it was pathetic. No matter what someone like me says or does they MUST percieve me as controlled.

Especially my mother, Jake, Julie and anyone else I have inside information on who screwed me over. Due to my having actual damaging information on those three parties its best to discredit me by having me percieved as a joke, powerless and helpless. There fore anything I say no matter how true it is is not going to be well recieved anyway.

Its a joke. I know it and they know it too. In a country where money, power and professionalism are respected someone like me no matter how talented or intelligent or in the right will always be steam rolled over by more powerful people...

Which is why I have divorced myself from the US in many ways and even lived mentally over seas for years. The last step is to take the body out of the country as well and then spread as much of my story as possible for my remaining years about how corrupt America is, how disgusting and how horribly I was treated. Again no one is going to really care due to my status being so low.

For all the laws that are made none of them apply to victims probably in any rich powerful country. Only money or power count. So why bother to do what they want or say? Its not like anyone is going to respect you for it. Yer a joke to most people especially in the USA, which is a very warped sick country at its core.

If I tell my story its going to be of my own Will and to serve ME. Not the overlords. The only thing most people are after is to torture me further to get reactions. Its probably entertaining or fulfilling in some way. I will never be taken seriously in a country like the US. Ever. And everything i say or do will be used as entertainment or against me.

So whatever the perps do is pointless. I respect and fear them about as much as I have seen they respect my intelligence or personal power.
Which is non existent.

The US is about BIG MONEY. BIG GAMES. Its not about respecting someone like me, its about supporting people like Jake or Julie and giving my mother a pay off for her role as a Judas, though they probably dont respect her all that much due to her moral weakness and low station in life.

There is a good reason I feel watched through the windows at The Women's Center (always from the direction of the Boston skyline). There has to be a good reason. That reason is that no one has ever had any true human rights values in this country. Its history is that of a destructive nation geared only towards greed and the exploitation of others for thier own ends. There may be worse places but there certainly are better ones as well, more suited to my personality and tastes.

The most distasteful part in this is that so much sexual abuse was used and still there is this attitude of laughing it up at my expense, then laughing it up in my face and eventually wanting to get me to believe they are laughing WITH me...then settling down and moving on and forgetting all that happened, eventually making nice or peace with this system and this culture and this country.

That has got to be the most disgusting thing I have ever experienced about this campaign in all the horrible things that have happened to me.

The people who laugh at us or like today at the other day drop in earlier, where two women's eyes met in reference to me and it was all amusement. One of these women was involved very overtly when I was being gang stalked early on in shelters. First of all she's a God freak so lets not pay her any mind to begin with second of all she hate prostitutes. She is the one that along with Christine thought it was funny that "some women cant get out of it" referring to organized crime keeping certain women down so they cant get out of prostitution. What kind of fellow female involves themselves in supporting the crimes of men? Women that dont deserve any consideration and aside from how I treat such women superficially do not EVER think I have forgotten the way I was treated.

Laugh it up. Becuz I am keeping score of every hurt every abuse and every person who laughed at torture. Its the way I am marketed in the USA that keeps people in amusement over my situation. Either that or its marketed as a cultural fantasy for men, and i was told that to my face by someone. That the thrill was "..especially when there is nothing she can do about it", in reference to keeping a woman in one of these campaigns or controlled like this.

America is so far gone as a nation, so removed from exposure to terrorism, strife, poverty or other real life events as well as so isoloated from other cultures that they truly do NOT understand what they are doing is murder or that its damaging. Americans are dangerous and brainwashed...dangerous becuz they are well kept by thier overseers with rewards that keep them supporting an abusive system. They arent overtly oppressed.

So in a place where destroying my life has never been taken seriously why would I give anyone what they want? I live in shelters and all my assets for a better life have been destroyed, that is giving many people what they want above and beyond what should have been.

Youve got people like this kid from Bare Necessities camp in Rainbow, Polar Bear, telling me that everything I once had was totally replaceable but I am doing myself in by continuing to make a big deal about all this. He actually named the police as the destroyers as well. That everything the police destroyed was totally replaceable.

WTF? Do you see how bad this is? Nobody understands what is really going on.

But people know the severity of this, I know they do. The point is to minimize my reactions so that I will live through this and be handled into forgetting about it all. Brainwashed into it.

Alot of NA people knew who was doing this. Don this older guy in Narcotics Anonymous from Watertown who makes awnings, first of all total suspect pedophile. Second of all he was one of the only people who warned me. We were in his van giving me ride home from an NA meeting. He stopped our conversation and out of nowhere started to tell me this random story about his neighbor downstairs who kept accusing him of having an x-ray machine in his apartment that was giving her radiation poisoning when in fact it was his refrigerator making such noises. It seemed very important to let me know that story.

As this campaign went on I realized that I soon would be tortured and so gas lighted that I to would begin to be driven to such madness. His story acted as a sort of inoculation against the mind being driven to madness by psy ops and torture. Which means that this is way more sinister and involved than its let on, that other people know full well what is going on not just me and a few choice people and that NA or people in it were involved which I could map out already. It must have meant that he overheard of a plan to drive me totally nuts over time.

It also means that he somehow knew that this would work on me to shield me mentally.

It also means ultimately that I am probably right about NA having major connections to pedo rings and working very hard to protect those people and thier connections in any given community.

That kid Kim today, she may very well just think the situation revolves around Jake and his brat rich kid friends, that supposed "hard core" crowd he joined to get what he wants out of life (yeah super hard core. Whatever) but I know damn well its moreso to protect Julie and at higher levels my mother's family as well as to ensure that I recall nothing and if I do that I will not be believed.

These people truly believe that thier families, their daddies thier asshole rich crowd is so privileged that little peasants like me are just born to live and die for THEM. To them its perfectly natural. No conscience whatsoever. I always got that creepy vibe from those meetings. That so many people in there had a quiet caste system going. Anyone who I thought was on my level come to find out that they secretly came from a very rich family.

Mary my sponsor would tell me that I put on such a good front that no one realized that I was having a hard time. Anything to rationalize abuse from the mob.

Its unfortunate but most people around the programmed person either know whats up or when its time for them to be targeted they go along with it and usually its set up that way, the person is kept down and surrounded by sleazy, immoral people so when it comes time to go after them if they break programming, everyone will just stand aside or assist in destroying them.

Its not that everyone is in on mind control projects or torture is that the mc victim is kept in a certain crowd that will be useful to the system when it comes time to destroy them. If they were surrounded by moral people it probably means that they are not a victim of mind control to begin with. Who would have sold them out to the system then to begin with? The person doesnt have a chance from day one which is why pedo families are controlled and used to gain slaves from.

I actually had someone in NA try to warn me about my family once. That they mistreated me and I just did not get it, it always seemed normal. How was i to know any different?

And yes this does mean that there is a conspiracy of people who like the idea of children being sex objects, these cults. Of people who turn a blind eye to such things or help perpetrators in what they are doing. Why women are in on this is the same reason that mothers of children with abusive fathers dont do anything or assist the father. What that reason is I dont understand nor am I going to try to explain what I dont understand.

but there is an entire subculture out there that totally devalues women like me and is socially acceptable within American society.

All but the most genuinely moral or upstanding elements of our society or people who's class goes against such ideas are most likely in support of or at least dont care to penalize such behavior. this is why in my situation alot of 'regular guys' would be more geared towards validating me being mistreated due to sex work being involved as opposed to mind control slavery originating in childhood. Their culture goes against that sort of thing so they are marketed to on another level thus the campaign gains thier compliance as well as thier cooperation.

Most of all people just do NOT care enough for my fate to matter to much of anyone. Another expendable person who no one had the power to protect from destructive factions.In a country this size, with as much sh*t as is going on right now no one is going to notice or care, which is why 2003 was the perfect time to start such nasty campaigns on individuals.

Therefore any mind games that are played by multi stalkers which is what I have been experiencing lately should not affect my decision making. Whatever they are trying to do whether it be mobbing for whatever reason or psych warfare to get me to suicide, go back into the business or just go quietly onto a life as an average ugly fat person with no high intelligence or talents, which i think is what they are aiming for considering that is thier level and that is what they did to my formerly beautiful mother, or if they are trying to get me to confess doesnt matter. In the end no one is going to listen anyway, I'll be written of as insane like my father and ignored. My work will probably be stolen as many TI' know this system actually does steal ideas life long.

My telling my story only provides the info for another Hollywood movie to trivialize my struggle.

there is no justice in this and there is no life for me here in the USA. As long as I stay in this country I will always be treated like a slave as black slaves were treated. Laws dont seem to apply to me as they did not apply to the country's forefather's black slaves.

And unlike blacks, we are going to have no saviors or Abe Lincolns or civil wars to free us. The USA would collapse without underground black markets and trafficked, exploited humans used for slave labor (in capacities from drug mules to spies to sex objects to human recording machines to assassins).

There is no way out of this. The perps and everyone who is involved on whatever level they think they are playing on or for whatever reason they believe it to be occuring will not change what they are doing or what is happening. Its the way of the USA. And I would be the first mind controlled slave to receive a fair deal which I have never heard of happening yet to anyone else.

I know the situation is hopeless so I go on doing things my way becuz there is no other way. The perps' way is death- wether it be a walking death living denying the true Self or suicide.

Thinking that any action they take will sway me is just more of the games being played which it seems are more of a focus than any final result aimed for from such actions.


Take a look at the map at 6:03. It shows states where this program was taken too easily or most popular. Every one of those states has THE worst organized stalking and harassment in all my travels around the US. Except Pennsylvania and Delaware as I have only passed through there. New York was not included and they are one of the worst for gang stalking but it is done by a population that seems ghetto and very African American based. The other states I encountered had a style that was one more attuned to something like Eugenics. Missouri, Illinois and Texas indeed have some of the worst harassment but not much tech, not like the southwest or the northeast seems to have and utilize moreso than in person human forces. Conneticut is really bad too and I think its listed on the Eugenics list as one of the top states as well.

Now as to why I am a perfect candidate for a Eugenics program. My family are criminals as well as my mother's side has pedophilia prominent. This of course is what caused any degeneracy I believe.
My father is supposedly mentally ill. Of course its convenient for this system to not look at the causes of those conditions as that would lead to revealing why I am being picked to be repressed and oppressed to begin with.

However, this is most likely using the Eugenics movement to either cover up thier true activities or as part of a false flag operation where the TI is once again gas lighted into believing its this party or that party that is responsible for the gang stalking. It could work either way. Most likely its false flag, unless there is some proof that indeed there are active systems of oppressing individuals in the name of Eugenics.

You could, I guess convince the public that someone was a candidate for this program due to the way that mind control Survivors act out due to breaking programming as well as being victims of intense psychological warfare campaigns, It would be the perfect frame up.

Two Found Interesting: Both to Supress Information

Talk about extreme info management.;wap2

Commission to Sight CIA and Pentagon for Human Experimentation

It seems I cant get any truly meaningful work done on this blog during the hours of 6 am to 12 midnight. Its just not possible. Its so bad here. And during the day all my focus is just on survival.

So now its after 12 midnight perhaps i can produce something serious.

I wonder how far this commission will get. Its interesting that many of the actual victims and in may case thier children have been targeted life long to keep them quiet and to continue amnesia, many of the actual victim witnesses who were scared off of going to the Pres Advisory Committee and class action lawsuit.

A page on some experimentation I was not familiar with:

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Labeling Kids With Bogus Mental Disorders

I cried after seeing this..and the gang stalking has made me into a person that just does not cry anymore which of course helps to lead to suicide, ruined health and further being vilified as a grouch or too aggressive or anti social due to high stress levels.

And STOP LABELING ADULTS AS WELL. Sometimes late in life people bloom or after they have stopped behaviors that were blocking them in thier youth.

I cannot believe the dangerous amount of bs concerning using psych disorder labels to explain away genuises, artists and also survivors of RA or mind control projects which of course is the hardest to have anyone believe.

If this video can make one feel so positive and as if oppression is being lifted then this is also a good example of how media is used to do the opposite especially in the last 10 to 20 years. Note how many kids movies now are dark- not figuratively but literally the lighting is very dark. And there are many visions of bad weather conditions and hard living conditions as if priming this population for some sort of disastrous future. Which of course does not need to be its being marketed and created.

Being a child that was exposed to alot of media for the purposes of mind control and programming I know what to look for as well as I can look at media from a child's eyes as if I was young and impressionable again.

The false created environment out there is what has created so much loss and disaster in the past 20 years. Its all about controlling the masses. Boredom, depression, oppression of people.

Its gone so far now that people are so brainwashed as a society that they just cant get out. No one even sees the imprisoning of minds and spirits for what it is nowadays.

I note there is not alot of positive content meant free up the human mind nowadays. Take strong note of that and apply it daily. Seek out content that energizes you not puts you into the hands of the brainwashers who seek to create your future for you. Its not hard you just have to learn to do it very quietly so that society doesnt see you internally rebelling or keeping your sense of true Self. For kids that are labeled its hard for them to keep a sense of self before they are aware of what Self is. These labels from outside peers are akin to peer pressure or group pressure on a cult member to bond with the group and take on its group ideology and or to destroy the individual's sense of self from outside forces.

For as many people that truly have a 'disorder' that interferes with thier living their lives, there are so many that are being labeled falsely.

In the old days you had to be washing your hands like 30 times a day and really be obsessive and acting out with compulsion to be considered OCD. Now if one arranges the condiments on a table while at a restaruant people will comment "your OCD is it?" or they themselves will say such a thing to describe thier urge to neaten up the table. My mother was a bartender for 10 years not OCD idiots. I also wash dirty salt and pepper shakers if I stay somewhere long enough due to being told it was disgusting by people in the restaraunt business. So how is that 'OCD'? I also used to neaten up if I stayed in someone's house for long enough to consider it my home. All of my maternal ancestors came to American sponsored as various house servants in wealthy homes in Weston and New Orleans. I would say its my urge to clean up or make a home nice or to assist a busy business owner who doesnt have to time to clean and I do.

People's motives for thier behaviors are not even taken into consideration by the psychiatric community. No one even asks anymore why we do things as part of conversation. This would indicate that the rule of the psychiatric field has trickled down into not only a pop culture but into the very social interactions of modern humans, in the lower classes at least where it seems that everyone is brainwashed to believe they all have a disorder.
I find it strange that only most poor people have disorders regularly and not people from upper classes.

When are we going to start calling these people on thier bullsh*t? Its pretty creepy when instead of asking "Why do you rearrange neatly the condiments on the table all the time?" people immediately have a prejudgment.

How have they gained such power? Its amazing. The drug taking society is much worse now than it ever was during the 70's or 80's. Why cant society also admit that pollution is much worse than it was back then. No one wants to look at the other reasons why people-thier bodies and minds are reacting the way they are to the conditions of the environment both physical and social.

(Also I didnt to research into that organization so dont know who they are just liked the video. And I dont want any pedo creepy suspicions just becuz its kids in the videos. If you can find anyone with the balls to make one for adults let me frickin' know and I will feature that as well.)

Another good gang stalking video/why the herd are dangerous

Liked this vid. Though its not as detailed as I would like nor does it have an order to it as I would have liked its more than I can accomplish right now so thanks to whoever made this.

Our greatest problem and probably history's as well is the stupidity of the public. Humans en mass are so easily driven or guided to acts of violence or cruelty that its simply hopeless. I have personally seen the deceivers looking at someone this stupid, joe public, and convincing him to take action against a TI. Its so obvious that its akin to the old devil on the person's shoulder.

Interesting: if you want to create a society or world where such evil infiltrates easily then take away any true moral teachings or systems the people may have. One such trick is to mess up Christianity so badly or make is so repressive that no one would want to deal with it to begin with. Thus hedonism that seems innocent (60's, 70's) can take the place of solid morality and there was some old school decency in the old days of the party scenes or 'hedonistic' sub cultures.

What everyone is so freaked out about now is the total nose dive into 'evil' that is not so innocent as rejecting the squares and thier uptight value system. Its become true evil- the real deal. Alot of people cannot deal with this and are either in denial or just sitting back watching the world get more corrupt. That is what happens when a culture tries to become more European and sophisticated but instead falls on its face and becomes totally evil. American never would have succeeded at being less puritanical or uptight. but in trying to shed that it has only taken on a quite puritanical attitude towards its taking to evil. Pure evil. There is nothing fun or amusing about pure evil. About actual rape and torture. About the destruction of human beings that this system has a capacity for using psychological warfare as well as technologies and psychiatric severely abusive systems like MK Ultra mind wiping/reformatting methods. These carry with them the seeds of all Nazi human experimentation..and no one wants to believe nor do they seem to care. Many simply dont know.

Its for real this time. Everything that was ever hidden behind all that you thought was sort of evil but harmless is now revealed. That is how deception works.

If people had a system of true morality or decency that wasnt puritanical or limiting them as human beings they might recognize pure evil when it comes to them and be able to defend themselves- IF that is what they desire or if that is thier true nature. The problem is not with people who are predisposed to 'evil' deeds by thier very nature- the problem is with the common person being naive about what evil is when it confronts them. And that always may include the most artful of deception.

Be wise as serpents should be the motto, not puritanical values telling people what to do with thier bodies and limiting human beings in thier expression or punishing them for being natural.
A true believer in doing the right thing is a warrior and fights to see the truth, not a lamb who is beaten down by some church or belief system. also one must act on one's own will.

I see so many morons now who suffer as they see I am now permanently damaged and homeless probably for life. In that moment they listened to the deceivers, they were stupid, weak and naive. I on the other hand, saw them quite clearly and saw exactly what they were doing much of the time. A part of me is not so forgiving and my revenge is seeing them suffer now. I make sure they see me, and often I antagonize them. This isnt about forgiveness. This is about war. If you truly want to avoid being duped by the destroyers you will stop punishing people and being mindless vigilantes and start recognizing a con job when you see one.

Unless of course you are simply being selfish f*cks on getting your own frustrations out on an innocent target via mobbing which has no consequences. Then by all means go with your nature. Please do. Becuz you will have to pay for that at some point as there seems to be a faction that doles out consequences to the perps as does the perps dole out torture and suffering to their targets. And I wanna see you all pay the way I have been watching so many of my enemies pay and will continue to do so for as many years as I may keep breathing and being able to see them suffer with my eyesight intact. Its part of what keeps me alive.

Whoever told you that 'good' people are forgiving or that most TI's are Christian types is either a fool or very good at covert warfare, thus getting you to do thier dirty work.

The people who arrange these massacres are professionals. They dont feel like normal people do this is thier job. Either that or they enjoy what they do as sadists or are cult mind controlled it seems. Some do it out of desperation to not be exposed or to avoid serving a jail sentence. Much of the breaking up of corruption that seems above board and overt such as bribes, pay offs, corrupt politicians and those in union law enforcement like cops or people in probationary positions in the criminal justice system seems to be part of breaking up this system that so easily functioned on these quiet trade offs in order to get a TI targeted and destroy thier lives.

That still does not fix the tech that is used. But in order to break down a targeted person so the tech is more effective (due to brain damage and long term conditioning) the in person gang stalking has to destroy them to a point and that cannot be done without the help of every stupid dupe out there in the public.

People are getting hip though. I have personally seen a few persons reject perp advances. One told a perp "I am not intersted, its none of my business". That was one of the greatest moments of my life recently. People are realizing this is simply a business and that many people are just product or meat to these companies. Perhaps they are seeing their all powerful law enforcement darlings who no one thought would ever get caught now getting thier asses reamed for f*cking around and so now they feel that this corrupt sect of powerful men can no longer protect them unconditionally from consequences.

See? The public are smart once they get the hint that they might get caught...this is why vigilantism is illegal to begin with.
All criminal justice is under the category of the sciences. I know that yer cooler than thou police man seems hes yer friend when he wants something and hes a brute when hes your enemy but these are all games. These men and women in any law enforcement capacity are usually intelligent criminal like minds to begin with complete with an above average psychic sense about people. They are extremely dangerous when not doing thier jobs properly. They are smart about playing games with the public and alot of it is psychological games. They are predators plain and simple. Only some urge to serve or do good in them separates them from criminal predators. Keep this in mind when you believe that the police are above reproach or that they are yer friends.
I get the feeling that if trouble came, if corrupt, they would forget your friendship as fast as it takes to get rid of you or drive you to get rid of yourself to cover thier asses and any evidence left behind.

There are forces within the police that seem to be self regulating or seem to have checks and balances. This is NOT the case with joe public.

So two things that make vigilantism a no no for the public.
-you are not trained in the sciences or to think scientifically about how to determine a persons guilt or innocence by SCIENTIFIC METHOD
-you are not bound by laws in position as vigilante nor did you take an oath to protect and serve. You do not have an internal affairs dept to deal with corruption or unlawful actions or abuse of authority in your position

That is the difference between a system of order and a stupid mob. The perps of 'gang stalking' depend on the stupid mob urge to get basically free labor out of the public in thier campaigns.

Remember that.

Also realize that the ONLY reason that you have not been caught for your actions is becuz someone somewhere very high up is using you for just that. Dont you think with what the feds and others have for spying and anti terror they could totally bust up mobbing groups? If you fucked with the wrong people you'd be caught or stopped very quickly.

Your being used most of the time. To accomplish something that requires the assistance of the public. And the public should wonder very hard before helping any authority figure catch bad guys, when there are billions of dollars sunk into the military and other agencies per year to have the means to do so. Why would they need you? Usually its for means of social control that shouldnt even exist in democratic countries or its to assist in dirty deeds. The people behind this sort of thing relish the thought of not only fooling and destroying the target but getting you to help them under false pretenses.

They have now taken away the innocence of multiple persons not just their target. And being that these campaigns usually fit in with the drug/money laundering/pedo networks and beyond- that is just thier style isnt it?

Wanna know why I am still alive, besides being assisted by parties unknown? Becuz I was never arrogant enough to believe that I fully knew what I was up against. I never claimed to know what was going on but I knew that what they were telling me was total bullsh*t. And conversely part of me knew, probably from programming, the very nature of what I was dealing with at its core was something very detached from what we see in daily life. Something in me from my earliest memories knew that this was that pure evil, so removed from daily life, that I had forgotten and compartmentalized long ago.

If you dont know what yer dealing with then dont accept the invitation. Unlike myself who was spared destruction by my core programming having some experience with 'evil' in itself you may not fare so well.

I watch these foolish people, now years after what they took part in. They are either too freaked out to even look at me, are scared of me the way one is when one sees someone rise back up from the dead or the guilt is just starting to creep up on them.

And there is a part of me that will make sure it takes its full course and destroys them.
Then again there is a part of me that is 'good' in the sense of watching for the health of human beings and simply wants people to learn from this.
The problem is that humans by their history on this earth keep doing this kind of thing over and over again. It seems a trick of the deceiving factions to first take down the first lines of defense, good true solid 'morality' or decency if you will and then when its time just rush the gates like thiers nothing thier to stop them. One can rebel against authority or systems of belief that seem old fashoined and limiting without giving up common decency or sense.

There is also the problem of the public being brainwashed to believe they are all privvy to the same realities as only the coolest and baddest of the past. They are all famous now, all hip, all jaded- all rock stars and ganstas. They can so handle what goes on.
yeah its not hard to do behind a computer or a cell phone..hiding like some total a-hole.

They now get to live out cultural fantasies without any kinds of consequences at all. And in return for this constant dark Disneyland they will gladly do whatever the establishment wants them to do in return.

Just dont wake them up from the dream.

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Evaluating Therapists for Ritual Abuse or Programming

This would be feasible upon deprogramming. After years of gang stalking, abuse and psych warfare it's debatable whether a person isn't so damaged that trying to unravel the mess created by targeting a Survivor wouldnt either be impossible or do more harm than good.

And what if the therapist is a perp? Its all so sad.

This system expects to use MK Ultra mind wipe/personality reformatting programs to remake the Survivor and of course become so brainwashed that like some of the original experimentees of Cameron's- be happy or glad to be 'cured' no matter what the cost to thier health or true happiness that could have been.

They will do anything to convince the Survivor that the system has taken care of them and given them the best and safest option for thier future by destroying them and making them basically lobotomized. If someone is brainwashed enough, they will actually believe that in time.

Who needs a therapist or human Will when the behavior modification system can do it for you, as well as take care of the messy and risky issue of disclosure exposing the system?

The NWO is about relinquishing your total and inner self Will to an interconnected world wide system.

I was looking at my passport today. It said ..."ensure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defence, (spelled that way) and promote the general Welfare..." that is part of the constitution. Having these technologies and weapons and psychological warfare systems might just fulfill a new interpretation of what those things mean in the 21st century. But it goes against Liberty and true Justice as well as a citizens pursuit of happiness. Unless one is willing to internalize the re-definition of "happiness" as defined by one's handlers, brain washers who are trying to create a new personality after the old one is wiped via torture, brain damage, isolation and extreme heartbreak and spiritual gutting/destruction.

I think we are dealing with factions using too much license in thier interpretation.

For an entire culture geared towards escapism, excuses, unreality and drug use this all works out perfectly. Its the best drug on earth and its better than psych meds. A fake feeling of shallow happiness all the time. Of peace begotten by extreme torture.

One creates lambs for slaughter, not peace. Or the ill begotten idea that peace is brought about by the lamb's slaughter.

Its also a great way to drain someone of thier energy and then get away with it...for some vague ideal of the common good of course.

Monday, December 27, 2010

Nick Begich and the youtube banned vids on HAARP

I hope everyone understands that I try to best I can every day but I am heavily targeted and often all I can do is express my anger or be silly and forget about the reality of my situation. I am not often able to do serious research like today.

The snow storm as well as other good luck today is making it so I can actually get work done. Many computer systems seem to be tweeked so that remote influence gets to a TI, its WiFi why not?

I think I realize now that they were very afraid of me and still am due to the fact I have this way of getting my point across while speaking that makes people realize that I am telling the truth. Many women who were beautiful and smart have been targeted due to people listening to a woman moreso than a man as people trust women's motives moreso in politics as well as people are geared to paying attention to beauty, youth and intelligence.

the reason those women in Central Sq taunted me with saying "its over" arrogantly is that not only do I not have the beauty, youth and smarts I did or intellectual capacity, I have been driven to act out often in ways that will discredit me. They may have been talking about the federal investigation time period as well and also the 3 year window to go after OLNICK and the Pettiti's for the life long damage to my health from that moldy apartment.

central Sq Cambridge is a horrible place for gang stalking. But unfortunately I am a homeless woman and all the services are there not near Harvard where it seems alot safer with being targeted. Its not totally safe as I feel watched all the time in Harvard Sq. I found out there are many cameras pointed at the pit and the Square so my intuitions were correct. Also due to the angle that we are at when sleeping at the CoOp I saw one day that there are many many cell repeaters on top of a few buildings in the square and this always brings problems.

There is probably tons of cell phone and hidden cam begotten footage of me in high stress areas acting out by either threatening someone when I have had enough, using various racial slurs my favorite being the N word to males only usually as if they insist on using thier gender against me I insist on using my only power play against them. And most likely a number of other various
'freak outs'.
However, I am confident that anyone in thier right mind who understands the incredible pressure I am under and have been for years would know that these reactions are pefectly normal under these very special and abnormal circumstances as well as the results of intense ongoing psychological warfare.
I have nothing to be ashamed of though I probably should take an N word management class. It just seems like the only thing that puts off the males involved. It works. Women I can deal with so I am not as threatened. One just gets tired of the bs. I used this word in SoCal on a guy cruising me and he tried to whine to the light skinned cop who came over to see about all the yelling (you cant freak out and have skirmishes in the streets there as part of living like in the northeast. You have to be nice there when yer being an asshole.) After checking the guy's record and he had a long history of trolling the cop told me I could leave. He also responded to the call with amusement at my choice of words. Why? becuz the guy whining like a girl that I called him a racial slur was a predator playing the race card.

This is a war, not some PC tea time party with pinkies raised on our cups. this is NOT normal life, these are NOT normal circumstances and to focus on my using any sort of foul language while fighting in these battles is as ridiculous as penalizing a soldier on the front lines of Iraq for using the phrase 'sand monkey' or other typical creative license during wartime. Due to how white washed an era we live in I can just see the military training these guys to not use foul language while also training them to kill with precision becuz that is the amount of total bullshit we have in our world now. People are so determined to not face reality and truly change the world instead of green it up and PC it up enough to still preserve the old guard and the old ways of doing things.
You can be as liberal and pc as you want. Soldiers are still dirty dirty dogs like in my grandfathers day. You can spin the image all you want. War is totally f*cked and people kill, rape, murder out of turn, torture, suffer and die. Language is the least of anyone's worries.

Just becuz you may be fighting for a cause or a just war doesnt mean that war itself has changed in thousands of years. Its still aggression and it still sucks unless you are the sort of person who is natural to war and makes a career out of it. Those people tend to also hate bullshit I notice.

This is why its not 'over'. And looking at this video I realize why its so important to convince me its over and move on. Becuz there is more than enough legit information out there to put the puzzle pieces together and if I had the clarity to present a well constructed presentation I would most likely not only be believed but gain alot of attention.

Notice how most of the people who get face time and lots of attention for fighting this are men? (Alex Jones) .Men who seem aggressive and stressed? Men who make claims that often cant be bought by the public easily? (Icke). No females are getting any sort of face time like the men are. There has got to be something to this. Perhaps if a woman brought it out to the public as a major concern people would pay much more attention due to just thier gender.

I think people take women speaking of victimization more seriously. When a man speaks of it its seen as male infighting especially males going up against daddy-like authority. A woman or a number of women banded together and marketed just the right way might form the idea of a concerned mother figure which might be much more of a threat. You will recall that all of the men involved no matter how powerful or scary or rich or influential have mothers, right? Trust me they know what women could do to this issue.

Women traditionally are concerned with human welfare and people being hurt or in danger. This is why its so important to discredit and crush and destroy the women involved in whistle blowing. They know they are totally violating human and civil rights.

The damage done by these technologies is worse than anything you can imagine. Its torture and the worst of it is that its never acknowledged publicly.

And if what is going on with international disasters is also induced by tech then getting the public
aware is then the main goal.
From there its thier Will if they want to be enslaved any further or not.

The original vids from Begich seem to constantly get pulled off YouTube.

Monday, December 20, 2010

Shrinking Pituitary Gland: Comment From Reader

Someone wrote me a comment I erased accidentally. It said that I was giving the perps too much credit for saying they knew enough to damage and shrink the pituitary gland. And things connected to that post.

You have to understand the nature of what we have coined 'gang stalking' in or little loaded language in our small sub culture of grass roots type activism.

In reality we are dealing with spy craft and military ops. Mind control, social control. These are very old games and tactics- and systems.

I recall seeing that Hollywood movie with Yule Brenner who played the Pharaoh against Moses.
Pharaoh tells his aides to simply write Moses off as "mental". Whether this is historically correct or not, don't know but its an interesting reference to the way power deals with dissidents.

'Gang Stalking' would be very obviously connected to covert ops to anyone with training. Unfortunately for many of us we were not savvy or versed in such subject matter so therefore spent years wasted in confusion over what was happening to us.

These people wether they are direct govt or contracted out security companies, they are professionals. Or at least the people designing the psychological warfare are.
They know exactly what they are doing believe it. Our only hope is to find out what they are doing and fight in return and resistance.

Perhaps many of the lower level people dont understand the full scope of what is being done but someone does. Ultimately at the highest levels this has to do with the concepts of Vril or orgone energy production and much to do with energy fields. Either natural production of energy or the repression of that natural energy production, or the invention of man made technologies that produce energy fields as well used to destroy. As well as preventing evolution in man. This era is very much about directing the evolution of man with technology as well as it seems to repress human conshusness, especially diminishing the inner dimensions of human conshusness, as in perhaps capturing or repressing this with technology- even computer use or the use of tech in media.
Those are just theories based on my experience and going by what seems most important to the 'gang stalking' system at the most sensitive levels.

Destroying or damaging the pitituary gland makes alot of sense if one is trying to destroy potential and spiritual power.

Also the main reason I posted that was becuz A WOMAN ALLEGING TO BE A TARGETED INDIVIDUAL TOLD ME THAT INFORMATION just as I posted it. That they were trying to destroy the pituitary gland. She knew alot about my situation and alot about things like that info she slipped to me. So that is where I am getting that from. I am not giving them any credit at all. If anything, most TI's underestimate this system and its goals.
Shifting time lines by influencing events is no small feat.

Looking Back at How I Was Cheated Out of Helpful Services- hurray for liberals in the deep blue state

Yes, I went inside..mostly due to my being sick and not recovering. No I dont like it. Shelter people especially the women are alot different from travelers and street people. However they tend to be more settled and sociable so one can get things done.

I love how i hear in these places all the services that no one told me about when i had my apartment, things that would have made it alot easier to go through the transition I was attempting. I cannot believe how cut off I was but its interesting that people who should have been assisting me at least with information were not willing to be informative. It was like a constant mystery- all this funding and assistance and food pantries. No one made any efforts at all. Not the psychiatrists, the social workers, the therapists or psychologists. The system just seemed to block me every time. Even Mass Rehab I will never forget the look on the woman's face who did the three week vocational testing- her jaw dropped when I said that my councilor who was the director I think, was not willing to help me according to my disability which at the time was anxiety, some panic attacks still, what seemed like agoraphobia off and on as well as seasonal affective depression which is simply being very depressed in the worst summer months and moreso in the dead of winter. Then of course was the obvious mold conditions which I look back now and cannot believe the amount of negligence on so many agencies and professional's part. The idea that an entire city or multiple persons and agencies would be willing to do such things, take purposeful action and INaction to destroy a woman's looks, youth, intelligence, talent- her total potential, is just unfathomable. Its just mind blowing really, to look back on it now. The sheer numbers of people involved in this.

I cant wait one day to find out how many of them were running off of a smear campaign or simply that people like Jake, Julie and all thier connections were simply more important in the long run compared to the life of one woman.

As one obnoxious cab driver from Waltham said years ago during the height of the harassment: "Oh well, it doesnt pay to be poor". Oh if only that cover story bullshit/false flag operation diversion/ gas lighting disinformation were actually true, this whole situation would have been alot easier (and ended alot sooner by logic).
But one has to ask does it pay to be a survivor of high level programming? I would say for all the attempts at this system to destroy experimentees or survivors, its much better than just being some poor dupe that everyone thought was stupid.

Lets hear it for front alters. And the discipline of revenge.

So many people who are aware of gang stalking that were more active during Bush, like bus drivers, they look at me and you can tell the thought is that they are forever safe becuz I am weak. Weak til the end and powerless to fight back. So they have nothing to worry about- ever.

As Per Usual the Snow Gives Relief From Influence

Its snowing here. As is the norm I note a slight relief from being so brain fogged and influenced constantly by an interface. The effects of whateveritis are noticably lessened under these circumstances normally and here again we have the same.

MIT Seemingly Harmless Behavior Modification Technology

Seemimgly innocent behavior modification technology from MIT.

Quick view:

Their funding is so large and from many govt sources as well as military contracts this institution is not to be trusted at all. Its no surprise that I experience various symptoms of behavior modification when in thier library using the computers. I have posted this before. These things only occur at MIT.

The very fact that I keep going back there when I know damn well its a danger zone shows that I am not totally in control of my Will and faculties- this is due to remote influence being used, which I have documented is present from 6 am to 12 midnight approximately daily except for US holidays and when in the metro Boston area, Sundays. This also depends on location as what building structure I am in. The effects of what seems to be remote influence technology subsides under certain conditions consistently- those being going underground such as on the trains or into basements of buildings especially hospitals.

My memory is consistently interfered with. My personality is noticably changed, more towards the feminine and helpless.

One of the active 'training' mechanisms of this system is in the metro boston area at least, I experience constant interface with a call and return system that keep my mind from flowing freely and resembles the symptoms of the disorder schizophrenia.
The reasons I believe I do not suffer from such a disorder but that what i am experiencing is human experimentation as well as purposeful behavior modification are many, but a few that are compelling are that my mother is a documented radiation experimentee from the Naval Hospital in Maryland in the 50s as well as my own experiences with tell tale signs of being involved in a mind control project such as suicide programming sequences, harassment and stalking by parties unknown to me that seem to be performing a psychological warfare campaign and possess information about me they should not be logic possess.
Also, a federal investigation involving a former associate of mine who is a very connected career criminal was used as an opportunity to further harass and stalk me during the Bush administration. However, during this time many things occurred that are not a normal or logical part of a criminal investigation- I was never subpoenaed either nor was I charged for any wrong doing on my part, which should have been done in a true investigation by law enforcement. Torture as far as I know is not part of normal investigations.

Since attempts to actually do me physical bodily harm were not successful nor was driving me to suicide to keep me silent, it seems that a long term behavior modification program is the last resort for this system to silence a victim witness and I suspect this has been done largely as marketed to the public as a reform of a sick or criminal person either moral or legal in grounds or has been accepted by the public as a sad and unfair but predictable outcome in a corrupt system based on wealth gaining protection and freedom.
None of these rationales are the true motives for the conditions I am forced to live under.

If what is done to me is not simply human experimentation then it is a time tested and reliable system of behavior modification to silence victim witnesses who are viewed as dissidents.

Also its expected that I will not speak out due to the smear campaigns. At ever turn this campaign is nothing more than threats and intimidation to keep silent about what has occurred for years.

Its hoped that even if the target speaks out or maps out thier story where it makes sense and has much documentation, most of the general public will perceive the Target as mentally ill or of such bad character as to be fabricating thier claims.
The main purpose of a smear campaign is to make it seem as if the victim is fighting back to avoid responsibility for thier actions when caught doing something embarrassing or illegal or immoral or in general negative.

Ironically in many instances, the system itself targeting the victim is what drives them or guides them into such actions to begin with.

My experiencing obvious behavior modification tactics at MIT is not the only reason for MIT to be suspect. I also experience alot of behavior from students and staff alike who look very guilt ridden when seeing me. Also I possessed and still do embarrassing information about a few MIT employees related to the adult entertainment industry.

MIT's faculty having embarrassing information that might get revealed on top of thier obvious track record with human experimentation as well as the power of thier govt funding and military contracts makes MIT very dangerous to myself personally as a Targeted Individual.

Much of what happens to a TI is obviously classical conditioning- part of behavior modification. In my case the purpose is to keep me very busy, confused and engaged so that much time passes and the possiblility of my whistle blowing making an impact is lessened with each year that goes by as well as to 'keep me down' personally and professionally. This phrase 'keep down' was told to me directly by someone in the know about my being Targeted, as one of the system's main goals.

I have also experienced harassment from person's around the campus area frequently but one is never sure if they are indeed MIT students or just organized stalking and harassment perpatrators, who's employer's idenity is a whole other subject matter. Private security companies have been documented to be involved in such activities even being bold enough to recruit people from Craigslist ads for such employment, even specifically using the term 'targeting' in reference to thier activities.

This article also shows that academics are fully aware of the psychology involved in technologies sold and marketed to the public.

In my particular case, its obviously a situation of might makes right as my being powerless and in poverty is the main reason for my ongoing situation as well as avoiding any true justice for my pain and suffering. These institutions and the companies they contract for as well as much unseen corruption and rogue elements involved are very powerful and influential. This is supposed to me the main rationale for destroying a human being's life as the person is powerless to fight back or defend themselves.

Much of what has occured over the years has been a false flag operation which means that I was led to believe many other factions were responsible for the activity, some examples of this in my campaign are
-the FBI as part of the federal investigation
-my former associate
-my former boyfriend/lover
-my biological mother or uncle
-the police specifically Boston, Cambridge and Brookline (as related to fed investigation as well as my involvement with said associate and boyfriend) as involved in a conspiracy to destroy, frame up or at least discredit me in relation to any testimony concerning the criminal activities of the afore mentioned persons
-the CIA, or its rogue agents often found to be involved in clandestine operations in cooperation with business interests and organized crime
-the US military or para military
-secret societies

also the reasoning for such activities usually occulated between a moral judgement resulting in the general public being involved in, and validated in executing vigilante justice or the idea that I am simply mentally ill.

Unfortunately for me, my father also seemed to be aware of my mother's being involved in such projects and due to his often mentioning this carelessly, he then began to exhibit strange behavior and was eventually labeled mentally ill. This was then attempted in the campaign against me but failed due to the obvious inconsistency of using two rationales instead of one strong one. One cannot be persecuted for being immoral with vigilantism if one is merely mentally ill. Due to catching my father in this obvious net, it was intimated and suggested early on in the harassment and stalking campaign gone 24/7 during Bush that I was also mentally ill and that this condition was genetic.

My father's claim was as follows: that my mother and her family were involved in a secret govt project involving the military and the CIA.

If one looks at the evidence later revealed in the mid 90's concerning this claim one sees that my father was correct:
-my mother securing the documents showing she was a radiation experimentee at the Naval Hospital in Bethsesda Maryland USA, as well as she was "followed" and dropped her place in the class action lawsuit as well as giving her testimony at the President's Advisory Committee on Human Radiation Experiments
-if one views the PAConHRE videos one can see testimony given by other survivors of experimentation both radiation and mind control projects, where claims of such harassment as experienced by Targeted Individuals is par the course for being an experimentee and especially being a govt whistleblower, which one is essentially at that point. The CIA's claim they did not do radiation experimentation cannot be validated as they themselves via Helms had much documentation of many projects and sub projects destroyed. (much the same way they recently destroyed tapes of torture at Guantanamo bay during the Bush administration.)

Survivors testified that they experienced and also overheard while in facilities being experimented on that both were performed on many experimentees.

Not only does that establish that this harassment is the norm for experimentees and whistleblowers it also shows that technically speaking my father was correct in his claims: these experiments were backed and funded by both the CIA and the US military- my mother having both parents in the US Marines I believe her father was active during her being an experimentee.

There is nothing to prevent powerful agencies, now outsourcing or contracting out to large and powerful corporations in this modern age, from continuing such experimentation or using established yet classified methods and technologies to silence victim witnesses.

Its obvious the parties responsible not only did not want the full scope of their activities revealed they also wanted to minimize the amount of victim witnesses coming forward. As well as reduce thier financial liability for all damages. For instance, my mother in later years now experiences health problems connected to thyroid activity which is very common in radiation exposure. My mother and I are also the only two females in our family to suffer from chronic severe endometriosis, now admitted to be an auto immune disease by the medical field.

It seems that the harassment's main purpose however is to keep victims traumatized and silenced. In the testimonies on video its plainly said that the amnesia programming was breaking down in many survivors and this was the reason for the large number of survivors coming forward with memories and testimonies. This harassment more connected to psychological methods of controlling programmed victims, mind control experimentees moreso than just intimidation to minimize testimony from victim witnesses.

Another fear I suspect is that the institutions and people involved in such atrocities would be held accountable as war criminals under the Geneva Convention. The very fact that none of this content was brought to a US court or a military court shows the amount of corruption involved from the very beginning of the proceedings. In recorded history no American professional or institution acedemic or otherwise has been held accountable under this international law even though one can easily find credible documentation for many instances of obvious unethical human experimentation, that obviously violates US human and civil rights under law.

If something is denied to exist or minimized effectively it cant very well be tried in court or even get that far.

It is the belief of many survivors of experimentation and mind control projects that much of the content and material to come from these projects has flourished into mass mind control systems and is being utilized to control and manipulate human populations internationally in the interest of powerful entities with an obvious agenda.

It seems that much of what is or has been experienced by survivors of mind control projects or experimentation is being experienced by the masses who are mostly unaware of nature of such systems.

One of the main problems is the public seems unaware that technology, chemicals as well as psychology are not innately good in nature or virtuous but can serve both positive or negative, destructive ends depending on who is using such things for thier goals. If the public are allowed only the perception that these things are good or used by only authorities that do 'good' in our world, that in itself is enough to keep them ignorant of the dangers inherent in things of such potential power to destroy or enslave as well as assist humanity.

Sunday, December 19, 2010

The Roundtable News Show/ selling social change like a product

"The tide of history is rolling forward" said some male speaking on the roundtable discussion show.
Then he said that we are in the midst of a great progression in his country in this era.

But how many of us had to suffer greatly during Bush in horrible ways to make this New World Order a reality?

You dont need to listen to spin, you dont need to let Obama con us with gentleness or any of these men in suites talking sh*t out thier ass to sell news.


Also, it seems we have a childish public who have been wounded who now want Dems and Reps to work together. Aww, mommy and daddy are going to reconcile? This is very very bad. IT shows that the American people dont feel in control at all anymore. They feel parented by the authority figures. Its disgusting.

And there is only ONE female commentator going up against a panel of males, of course there is a male with blue eyes, very athletic football player built that is obviously part African American in his DNA somewhere. Another advertsisement for one of the agendas. The woman on the other hand, is a bottle bleach blonde who is older, not attractive, totally emeciated and wearing bright red, like the owned whore of these agendas. One of thier 'bitches' it seems.

Why cant there be a female on these shows that is as athletic and attractive as the black male is being marketed on that panel, or even in all media nationwide (if not internaionally now?)

Fuck the new world order as it seems to keep sexism firmly in place. I dont trust it and I dont want it. Until the system admits that its new sick agenda has nothing to do with truly recognizing true female power then its just another enslavement sham.

I will accept the black male in all his incarnations as my better or superior when HELL FREEZES OVER. I would rather have Condelina Rice as an authority figure or any other kind of female than the bullshit they are trying to market know. RACE AND CLASS SHOULD NOT BE COVERING FOR SEXISM.

Now someone is bitching about the lack of black speakers on some issue. I ONLY NOTICE THE LACK OF RESPECTABLE POWERFUL HEALTHY FEMALES.


Sexism has made a return and its disgusting. Now that annoying guy from NJ, the mixed football player looking guy, is aggressively pushing his view. Just his manner is a total turn off. I cant even focus on what hes saying due to how obvious it is hes an ad. ( found out his name is mayor Booker. NJ? Then the mob comes to mind. Hes also pushing this mind control bs about interwoven destinies of all of us alive right now. Disgusting really)

NOw some man is speaking I recognize from being in news for a while. He seems honest and like he's speaking the facts. Hes countering the white woman in red and the blue eyed mixed football player looking guy from NJ. My mind just woke up. Goes to show what happens to the human mind when REALITY AND TRUTH prevail over spin or psychological games being used to brainwashing people subconsciously.

The round table...nothing got done and viewers wasted thier time watching passively as a bunch of different people discussed the 'issues' who are not Congressmen or Senators so its a waste of time. Strangely they are not your average citizens either..why not have an open forum or similar to this round table where common real people talk about these issues as such? Why are we sitting here passively viewing these people talking about this instead of taking action..oh I just answered my own question.

They just showed an ad for Boeing..that innovation is why they are here for us. Now I know its all a load of sh*t.

HAHAHA...they just showed an ad from GE of all companies, telling people not to smoke to save the planet. WTF? first of all even if you dont know that GE made nuclear bombs, you should be suspect of any big corporation telling you to not smoke- advising you on any personal health issue. Who the f*ck do they think they are?

Well forget this Round Table show- GE? Boeing? Forget it if those or their sponsors.

Now a black male is on show called Urban Update. I can deal with this...hes discussing news factually and hes not full of sh*t. Nor is he trying to market social change with subliminal tactics. He as real people on his show. Of course this is a local Boston show as no one from this area would be arrogant enough to try to treat local people from this college heavy area like we are stupid. Well, with the exception of the nightly news.

Interwoven destinies. The NJ mayor should become a poet. Or stay in philosophy class and stay away from politics. Write children's books or something. Is NJ that insane? Hmmm..yeah it probably is.

Well, I guess politics nowadays is just like dictating to children anyway. And I personally resent the f*ck out of it.

More Forced Healing This Morning

Woke up this morning with the idea that I have to make peace with everyone involved in this becuz I am going to die soon from bad health.

I spent my morning dream time traveling through places I had been and making nice with people who I had met and been messed with by, in the many years of this ordeal.
It was only like two places and two sets of people that I had met along the way.

The problem with this is that it 'heals' the victim of emotional and spiritual damage but its not REAL. Its done through obvious tech or other means. It only further assists injustice.

This of course goes along with what the military is doing to see if they can get soldiers to forget so as to 'cure' PTSD by melting away thier traumatic memories. Which of course makes sense as I am the daughter of a documented survivor of radiation experimentation at the Naval Hospital in Bethesda Maryland in the 1950's, where the military and the CIA both had human experimentation going- now understood as unethical.

Its obvious that I have been sacrificed into a second generation of experimentation. This is the reason most likely that the people around me throughout this have had the attitude of 'oh its not hurting you' or 'you'll be all right', and other minimizing of abuse and handling of the Target.

Its horrifying to think of how many of these people knew it was human experimentation or at least a severe behavior modification program based on torture.

Its bad enough I had to go through what I did and that people can easily deny everything they did. I do have years of documentation and can prove much of the corruption, but how easy is it going to be to string it all together to prove beyond a doubt that this was a conspiracy or plot of evil design by multiple individuals? The attitude of the whole world seems to be to forget it, that no one is listening, no one cares (as my mother told me when this all started in earnest) and it happened years ago, its over so forget it. Move on. Keep silent.

Also I have this idea that if I do write a book that its not going to change much or punish those responsible or get me justice or restitution.

We have to keep fighting. We have to reveal to the world, whether people listen or not, it HAS To be documented somewhere for history's sake at least.
We have to show reality to the world even if they want to reject that and call TI's mentally ill or whatever they want to do to deny our experiences.

Saturday, December 18, 2010

Just Saw Bush's recall, if you will/ frame up for dangerous terrorist

OK not alot of time.

Head is clearer than has been in a long while. This is due to a few different things occuring.

Has been very hard lately. Mind weakening due to years of harassment and psych warfare, torture and brain damage. Also health has come to a point where its critical. All this is making it so I am slipping dangerously close to or into the full effect of the brainwashing campaign. Opposed to the overt action seen and taken during Bush, this Obama era is one of mind control that seems more focused on constant bombardment of the mind as opposed to physical actions. Also I believe that the psychlogical effect of having such a person as president under such exact circumstances including what has happened to the economy world wide has created the effect of subduing any and all enemies of state or dissidents. We dont have time for PC or niceties this is war and I am at a critical stage, I feel I only have a few moments even of clearity- the reason for this clearity I will tell you in a few moments. Forget spelling or politeness.

Having a black man, NOT of American slave stock, as president after such abuse from a very WASP/ Southern family based, very white powerful male, under such oppressive conditions that are being blown off as not anyone's fault in particular ( or the bankers and I get the feeling that the puppet masters probably baited them easily with thier own greed, to get this desired efffect to make it appear it was all thier fault for the mess we are in. What about Govt deregulation?) is making a country who should be outiright pissed off and outraged about what happened during Bush, very silenced and humbled.

The psychology behind this is that somehow people feel that African Americans cannot be held responsible or fought head to head as power figures so they being in charge has a dulling effect on the justifiable anger- turning an angry country into a depressed one. also blacks are percieved as victims themselves so now the power structure of authority is 'with us' all. We are all now victims...and this conveniently lets the perpetrators of many messes that preceeded or caused this situation to exist now- to escape out the back with the booty and spoils. Never to be seen or heard from again.

A godamn diversion is what this is, while the theives make off in the getaway car. We are all lulled somehow into forgetting about what was done to us all during Bush.

Also there is this bizarre psychological effect - one that dictates quietly that somehow, its simply impolite to hold blacks as responsible for screw ups as it is white males of power. That is also being used against the public at least here in the US. The attny general is very light and obviously mixed but still African American. So is the president. Add to that the pressure we feel by having to look at such questions as his affiliation with a radical church and preacher, his Muslim name and backround (mind fuck big time) as well as his Kenyan backround- not African American. This makes race a VERY touchy subject..which is a perfect diversion again for the powerful white male authority/extremely brutish, corrupt, clever and abusive power structure to escape question or consequences for its actions during the former administration.
We are also I believe supposed to feel that people who understand corruption and being f*cked over are 'trying' for us as best they can. This may even be so, its hard for me to tell as i trust no authority figures at this point but its still serving as a diversion away from the original insult just under 10 years ago.
This insult is still being treated like the pink elephant in the living room that is there but no one talks about it.

This is also an example of systematic ignoring to gain a result in behavior modification or social engineering.

The thing that set me off to feel free and validated in what I am trying to do in just moments was seeing GW Bush's face on the TV during an USO show for troops which included wrestling (Sena of course ). It brought me back to the reality that started this whole process so many years ago. That I need to tell the public what has occured, without any care for my personal feelings, safety or future. Its that important.

Yet hte current portion of brainwashing within the campaign or program against me is so strong, so powerful in silencing and subduing me that I have been nuetralized effectively. All I do is sit around feeling as if its hopeless and no one will believe me anyway and when I am not being stifled to not tell my story, I am then being shown over and over UMASS Boston, that I should forget everything and go there, that is my future. That I would feel better if I started school and learning. I also feel relief when I help others selflessly, instead of focus on my story or setting things right, which also indicates a reward system based on the Target performing the correct and desired actions to gain relief as reward.

I have recieved comments lately from an anonymous harasser who is obviously very good at psychological handling. Laura, MItt Romney's family member who was the ex girlfriend of Tiberius who is my ex boyfriend Jake's best childhood friend (none of this did I recall until weeks after meeting her. She and others would play with the fact that I obvously had compartmentalized alot of memories in the past.) Laura used to say such things like that: that most of the harassment was now "all in yer head", which is bs of course. THis was back in 2007 or 8 when the gang stalking harassment was far from being over in public spaces. But now getting comments from this person saying the same thing as well as other brainwashing suggestions lets me know that its the same thing.
But in fact, this is a play on reality by the perps.

The worst of the most recent hararassment is, indeed, in my head. That i have mentioned over and over again in recent years that hte harassment seems now more driven by tech and to maintain or subdue or modify the Target as opposed to the terror that was to drive me and others to suicide or homicide during Bush.

The other thing I wanted to mention was that I am glad this occured tonight becuz I have been unable to write or post ideas. I am getting to the point again where something in this area subdues my Will to put thoughts into actions. Its a dulling affect. I am much more into starting to sew things than write, which is also being pushed as a nice career ideation- probably due to its lack of political content and its leaning towards the feminine, which is typical in this campaign consistently.
Emasculation has always been a very important goal for whoever is behind a very big way.
So now I can say what I wanted to post last night.
Quickly while I still have clarity:
Last night I had this ideation that a childhood friends mother drove by or at least had knowledge of me being back in town again. Somehow this led to the ideation that 'they' or the system are trying to really push the set up of me as a terrorist or a dangerous person.

In fact I have a draft I didnt post that i keep oscillating between thinking its a good idea to post and then knowing its not such a good idea due to its content. THe last post about American being evil and boring was much more balanced compared to the post in question. I see now why I got this ideation or information.

STILL this system seeks to prove itself correct in the assumption or proving I am a threat, a terrorist or dangerous person. If it ever did come true, I believe everyone who knows what has occured, what has been done to me will know- that its a purely self fullfulling prophecy of the organized stalking and harassment system of severe psychological warfare and torture through terror.

Now let me go erase that draft...or else just put it aside as documentation of the reality of what went on but never post it.

Seeing a modern talking head of the former president and that being so freeing from the chains that bind me now, lets me know that i am right when I deem it is NOT over and that I must do what I set out to.