End (Lonnngg post)

I want to thank everyone who was supportive. I thank everyone who gave me money while pan handling.
I cannot do this anymore. I get harassed and stalked and messed with every day. On top of that I have health issues that their gang stalking of me made it so I never got time to take care of them. These, along with all the stress, ensure misery and hardship in the coming years aging.

I now have an infection from that tooth that is in the bone as well as the bone is coming out of the gum and they want to do all this surgery. Also, I need an x ray to see just where the infection is in the bone and becuz Lahey did a complete round the head x ray when really they just needed an x ray of the one tooth months ago, the insurance will not pay for another type of this all around x ray of the jaw. The fact I am smart enough to know I can call Mass health and ask for medical necessity is one of the reasons society is punishing me. They seem to hate people who know their rights and will fight to get what they need. This is one of the reasons I am so hated.

I am not going to call Masshealth and argue with them. I should not even be in this position to begin with. The damage that 3 years exposure to various molds from 335, in me a person it will affect becuz I have the allergic reaction to it and liver disease (which I researched the mold exposure (mycotoxicosis) makes worse) has given me physical conditions that I can no longer tolerate.
Constant lights flashing and moving around when I close my eyes, unable to see clearly at night due to 'haze'. Alot of it had cleared up as I went to the less humid moldy climates and exercise, herbs has helped me exist but my breathing is not tolerable anymore as well as I cannot stay anywhere moldy and I can tell the minute I walk in to a room.

I believe mold exposure the brain damage it causes in vulnerable individuals is used to keep populations down especially the poor. It has been shown that the wealthy will have mold removal done in their homes..they know. Specifically there was a story about a politician a governor who had mold removal done before he and his family moved in. The title of the news story was 'new study shows mold only dangerous to politicians' or some such humor goofing on the fact that it is so obvious what is going on.
Mold exposure depends on YOUR immune system..dummies. Stop listening to the alarmists who cause panic (who want to make money) thus causing a backlash of denial of harm to humans (becuz they want to save money). Get a clue. It only affects people who are allergic to it (that is medically documented) and immunodeficient people.

Personally I wonder why people have allergies at all. Its either parasitic disease (another gem they deny vehemently as existing in the US..of course there are studies that show it exists in poor populations here and in places where immigration from infected countries is prevalent. How can you not get infected by an infectious disease if the people from infected countries are among your population? Again I believe its the immune system. With native American, Mexicans and Africans having been part of the US since the beginning....I often wonder if the invention of 'it doesn't happen here' is part of the new medical establishment. I have read that is was common knowledge of daily life at the turn of the century.)
Or a weakened immune system.
Why would I have a weakened immune system? Well liver disease is one factor, but I often wondered about the second generation radiation exposure from my mother being an experimentee from The Naval hospital in Bethesda, Maryland-(which is why I firmly believe in MK ultra and why I am a tbmc survivor and the gang stalking is part of all of it. Its an ongoing experiment. Either that or they need to destroy all evidence and experimentees. Perhaps its a bio hazard problem. Like I do have parasitic disease and they know its becuz of something they did so at any rate they know I am sick so I need to be contained or destroyed. Like they need to clean up after all the experimentation, get rid of us. All MK survivors say they are gang stalked.)

Mold was used in the Soviet Union to dumb down dissidents.
I was having home break ins at that time but I really didn't see it. I thought it was the landlady being obnoxious as usual. But the former tenant only had a mouse problem in 10 years of staying there..nothing major. I move in and all of a sudden there are pipes bursting outside the door to my place attached to a hall radiator upstairs, this affected my kitchen. Then the main heating pipe broke and no one would clean the mold of the wood floors I had to do it myself. Years went by as I fought and by then I was sick and will never be the same. After being homeless for years I refused to be pushed out of my home due to a sociopathic landlady who's family used to own the building but now gets HUD funding but still cant honor contracts with tenants and negligence. Finally someone from the Enviro Health dept. MADE her test. I made DAMN sure they did the tape test. They guys who did the testing were appalled. I studied all the kinds of molds that they found and each one had caused a different damage to me. Neurological, respiratory those were the main problem areas...and the headaches. The headaches never end.
I cant live like this anymore.

I have fought my whole life to do the right things and everyone is always so mean to me. My family are so mind controlled by programming and handlers that they don't even see me for who I really am. My mother is so manipulative that she sicked my uncle on me of course without mentioning the mold exposure I had gone through so he doesn't know what the hell is going on but he ll take action anyway.
They did all these horrible things to me after a life time of it as well and they don't tell the public or onlookers they want involved any of it, they just tell certain people what they want them to know in order for them to be used against the target in a way they manipulate.
This is why they never want anyone to talk to the TI or see what the whole story is.

I should not have to spend my life telling the world my whole story. I should not have to live publicly. Partially the public is to blame, in a very damaging and grave manner becuz they are so far gone they only want to be entertained and they hate someone who is perceived as a selfish loner who wont 'share ' with them.
If I tell my whole story to the world that will be the end of me and my programming. I will be completely controlled by the outside world. I will not allow this horrible kind of forced deprogramming.
No one listens to me anyway, no one cares about me. It seems the whole world wants me to just go away, so good. They can have their way.
And the gang stalking system keeps pushing the idea that I will fix things up with family. Social services people tried to push me to go to my grandmothers house when I never told them about her or her address.
I am never taken seriously when in fact the torture that I have endured is very real. Alot of people claim that MK ultra and the radiation experiments are intergen and connected. I firmly believe that the people involved treat you like an idiot and keep trying to send you back to abusive mind controlled homes becuz they know MK kids are not idiots. We are slaves and they want to keep us that way.
They come after you if you try to break the slave mentality. I was deprogramming, setting up a plan to take later treatment for my liver and take some classes in the meantime. I had a life plan all set up and a way to go about it. I even came up with ideas that would put my talents to use, to take them from the coping skills they were stuck in and bring them out into the world in a productive way. Finally I could have a life of my own.

The second you start on that road they will turn up the intensity so fucking much on the gang stalking that you will not be able to do shit.
Its so obvious that that federal bust that had nothing to do with me was used as a way to get to me. To create a never ending investigation to destroy me. People who were either way more deep in crime or closer to the sources of the busted individuals never got in trouble or harassed like I did. Some of intimated I was going to go crazy and how guilty they were, some of them helped to get out of trouble and were rewarded. Some people even tried to warn me, so I would not go crazy. This one guy was giving me a ride home. Out of nowhere he tells me this story about his neighbor, who thinks that the refrigerator noises from his apartment are really x rays messing with her. I could not figure this out....but later I realized this was a little inoculation..a psychological one. It was a little favor from him to me-'dont go crazy' is the basic idea.

But I am pretty tired of constantly having to not go crazy...of eventually becoming brainwashed. No I may not go crazy but I am going to forget who I am and all my memories will be gone, along with my talents and any independent thoughts. It seems to me that if you want to exist in this world awake at all you have to play by this mind control system.
It seems that this constant psychological warfare on the public is what makes a country what it is. These actions are the true borders of any country. It is what keeps things the way that certain people want them. It is what they perceive as keeping order.

I am not interested in any of this big picture sh*t. All I wanted was to get out of being a young woman and enter into my late 30's a productive happy healthy person..who in turn could help others, which is pretty much the responsibility of a female in her later years with no children. You have to start using your life experience and talents and good looks for something outside yourself.
It always killed me when people would try to intimate I deserved all this crap becuz I was Narcissistic or because I was a bitch or " did fucked up shit to people" and this was some sort of Karma. How the f*ck is it Karma if YOU have to provide earthly influence and interference to make it happen. Dont even try that on me kiddies.I was having flashbacks of being a male in India walking the streets starving to death when you were in High School and I was studying Hinduism and living among them before you were born.
The great thing about perps is that they assume you are as stupid as you have been portrayed to be. Especially the young.
( I no longer believe in any kind of visions or past life flash backs. It could all be bs from tech. It could all be made up and shown to us on purpose. I can no longer believe in anything anymore. It all seems like its either our own minds being influenced to direct us to take action or outside influence.) There is something interesting with the premonitions however. I believe these are falsehoods as well. Whatever they 'show' you and then you experience in real time later is just that--what they have shown you. You can deny a premonition. Just say in your head "That premonition will not come true" and will it away. A perp in NY intimated that I was partially in trouble becuz I could 'stop/change premonitions'. These people can go fuck themselves. Their main compliant(the spoilt brats) in life is that they hate those of us that will not be ruled completely by their false environment sneaky covert influencing tech.
Good a-holes. I just told anyone who reads this how to beat your stupid system. I hope they use it and there is chaos and disorder everywhere.

YOU JERKS HAVE GONE TOO FAR. ITS ENOUGH TO INFLUENCE THE PUBLIC REMOTELY AND COVERTLY AND ALL THE SUBLIMINALS IN ADS MAKING SUGGESTIONS but you had to get greedy in the last 10 -15 years didn't you? Total enslavement of mankind. You t think everyone is going to fall for being sucked into a controlled false environment via all that technology for sale.
The fact that technology is wayyy to important nowadays and is not being used in moderation as only a PART of life not life itself indicates something is very wrong and you know it..I know it.
You'd better f*ckin hope that they never know it.

Humans have a right to be free and choose. They have a right not to be forced into unhealthy circumstances or a lack of choice of lifestyle. The way that people just go along with these changes without any sort of revolt is beyond me.

I give up. If you want to take this as evolution of man go ahead. I know I have been left out that's for sure.

I will never go back to that lying, abusive, controlling family. Ever. I will not stand by as my uncle joins in the gang stalking and my family perps me in the interest of preserving family secrets and making sure my cousin stays the great white hope;a geneticist and an ordained minister? That is the best image makeover that family has had for years. I see it now for what it is.
His kids were always encouraged, I was always put down....even asked repeatedly when younger to do things for them or babysit like it was coerced. Of course I naturally resisted, which pissed my grandmother off cuz I wouldn't be blindly controlled. It was all about his kids, becuz obviously the bets were on his family, if he could produce something that would finally make that piece of shit look good. Redemption (ahh, how Catholic) and becuz I wish to be vocal about the truth, I am threatened with a label when I did nothing wrong. I have always been subjugated by that family and exploited.
There is a reason the perps nicknamed me 'Cinderella' when I was living there. Isn't that a bitch? You can get more honesty from gang stalkers about what is going on that your own family.

A perp intimated to me that the system called up my family and said I was dead in a an accident or some shit. I hope it is true. They deserve it. They never respected me when I was around, why should they deserve to have me around? You have no idea how fucked up those people are. And the most fucked up perps are the ones that want to put me back there.
If I go back there I will use every thing I have learned out here on the battle field to destroy that family. And if desperate enough don't think murder suicide isn't out of the question....hmm, who should I take with me. Ma? Naaa, she's suffering just existing. Grandma? Prob already dead or close to it. Debbie? Naaa too under mind control to be a threat. Not her fault. Tommy? Again, how can I be mad at another victim? Yet he does just think he is going to rule the roost with his bitch at his side and his children are sooooo much better than me. Yeah, if they were f*cking artsts dumb ass. Go back to suburban MA and stay there. You never did get it and you never will. I knocked Ed down a few times mentally and psychically and I can do the same to you, boy. I am my father's daughter not just the daughter of that harem of bitches Ed used to keep in line. You may have hung with Italians but YOU aint one. Do NOT fuck with me becuz I will make good on my plans from years ago to fuck up that whole family except not with the well meaning truth, just destroy.
His wife always thought these games were so cute, that it was just soo easy to keep a mind controlled family in line. Both of the assholes from Polaroid who married into my mothers family always had this sneaky secret superiority thing against the family. Like, always removed able to say 'look how fucked up these people are'. Like its a big joke or some shit. There is this ridiculous feud in the family for my grandmother's house. I enjoyed removing myself from this and any other greedy bs. Screw families and thier inward nonsense. There is a world out there...get yer fuckin head out of yer ass and go outside and tell the people around you that hold you prisoner that you need nothing from them and watch them fight among themselves over petty petty bullshit trying convince themselves they are important.

My ex clients could buy and sell this family and no amount of harassment is going to make me forget that. Yet this is why its so important to return me to a childlike state and get me back into the life of my dysfunctional family.
Its like in the movie the 10 commandments. Where the head builder takes that slave girl from her family and then says it would've been OK becuz she would have been returned to them when he tired of her anyway.
This mentality of powerful men has not changed. As far as the world is concerned, the reason I was going to do well in life was I was working off all the life experience that I had gained in the bizness. That it exposed me to the wealthy and I would not have come out of ignorance if not for exposure to that world. Very much so it seems that the system feels I should be returned to my rightful place, the lower classes-mentally, physically and emotionally. Especially intellectually.

The class ism involved is astounding. What is most shocking is that these attitudes can be illustrated from thousands of years ago. These are the moves of keep down that no one seems hip to. It just keeps happening. There is this illusion that the country is free and opportunity is for all. That there is upward mobility. That is not so and my case illustrates that. Slavery still exists just that it is done covertly. Nothing has changed.)

And becuz I have a right to be angry I am some sort of mental case. It really is a battle of realities isn't it? The oh so goood part of the family that is put on a pedestal in order to make like nothing bad ever went on is used to outshine the outspoken whistle blower.

Can u believe that we are dealing with MK ultra and things that link to major crimes against humanity and my family is still so inward looking that all they care about is their reputation from years past? I AM THE ONE WHO HAS BEEN OUT HERE ON THE FRONT LINES OF THE CONVERT WAR AND I CAN TELL YOU THAT THE PERPS LAUGH AT YOU AND YOUR EFFORTS TO HIDE THE TRUTH. Everyone who knows already knows everything about you that they can. If I tell my story no one needed to know who my family was but now they have asked for it. That move in 2006 will never be forgiven. The worst thing in my life that could happen has happened and you want to help my enemies by asking me if I think I have a mild case of insanity becuz I am talking about stalking and harassment that YOU have already stated is from a federal investigation? THIS is the family that the perps at social services wants me to go back to? What the fuck is this?
And everyone is convinced that if they freeze me out long enough that it'll just go away or I'll become brainwashed get into the system again and say 'ok I want to be a good little girl, and co operate. I am mentally insane and I imagined being exposed to mold under suspect circumstances, being harassed and followed across the USA, that my ex dealt drugs and sold me out, that my ex friend wanted to clean house and protect her crime enterprise, that my family are no good a-holes who have been selling me out for years and keeping me down. I imagined years of gang stalking terror and abuse and now that I have had too much more than any mind should be able to take I am submitting to tbmc and brainwashing. Rewrite my history for me, tell me what to think, tell me who I am, and rearrange my reality for me. Be my God. I need the system to run my life. I want to be the sacrificial lamb so that a shit load of other people have great lives while I suffer in silence. I want that. I am willing to disregard that alot of human beings came up to me and told me to my face what was happening and that it was real. I am willing to relinquish the truth that this is an ongoing never ending situation, the psych drugs will take care of that. I hand my life over to you'.

UUHHHHHHUUUHHHHHH.. why do I NOT THINK SO.

My exes favorite movie was THX 1138. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/THX_1138

In his way he was a rebel and very smart about what was BS in this world. He hated that awful fake out of a French circus that the masses love and the awful show where the English guy tells you if you suck or not and everyone is like under 25 so it guarentees that he can dish out crap on them.
In the end he turned out to be much more of a survivalist than I. Much more business savvy, which he always was. It was the smarter move for success, depending on how you define success.
I realize now that he watched those movies but I indeed had lived them. All the scifi all the fighting against the overlords. Sometimes unlike in the movies it isnt the heroic or the noble it is the desperate who are given little choice but to fight the authority for their lives and to preserve who they are.

THX 1138- in the end, Donald Pleasance decides to let the enforcers take him. He makes his decision and he goes quietly. He had looked down the train tunnel which was the means of escape and he decided against it. He was just too conditioned or weak the viewer is to assume.
I never wanted to be that guy. Ever. There is no excuse to be that guy-ever.

The other man ended up on the surface, a guarenteed death from the radiation that still plagued the earth. What other choice did he have? None...none at all.

I feel very much like that. Its not like I am being allowed to have a normal life. I often wonder if it is becuz I can see that Cirque is alot of diversions and subliminals ..its very manipulative and there is a lack of privacy. I like gays as long as they are civil or outrageous queens in my face. I do not like productions that scream at you silently..if you get what I experience. Its too stressful for someone seemingly trained to spot bs. Or that I cannot sit through COPS or Idol without sensing its use in social control of the masses. That the hand cam effect is co opted from the Rodney King days, which never ended becuz all TI's who are savvy have to carry mini video cams with them for protection/deflection.

What was the norm in the 1990's is now considered paraniod. As if oppression just ceased or something. It has only continued, the line has continued and it has evolved. Oppression did not end becuz when Bush got in Earth First diappeared off shelves and everyone gave up...I mean grew up. People are still telling Naomi Klein to 'grow up'.

Its as if denial or bribing/intimidating the masses is going to change reality somehow.
I am reality. My situation is real. No matter how much you deny it or simply want to write me off as a crazy nobody you have to admit there are alot of people making claims the same as mine and like me they are not disordered but articulate and sound sensible.

The public are just sooo into complete denial. Becuz its not worth them standing up for what is right. Its easiest and most profitable now to go along with the genocide of people who are deemed undesirable or a problem for People Who Matter or society in general.

No one of import is going to read this work. Its obviuos. None of it matters. It will change nothing and the only people who can take action on it are probably perps who use whatever they can get out of it to destroy or control me further.

As long as you keep ignoring the victim then eventually they will give up or go away..perps go by me and sigh, like 'why arent you dead yet'.

Who wants to live in a world with a system like this anyway? What would the point be?

And worst of all is the feeling that a great amount of people you meet are being dishonest with you. That is what I think sends most TI's to thier graves. No one can live with other people in control of thier lives to that extent. No privacy, no control.

Its intolerable. And you have to watch everyone else have this great life.Even the people who suck get to have great lives, the ones who sold you out and know exactly what they did wrong. Its like no one has any feelings.

I think this system needs constant victims to exist. And there is always someone in the way that will be fed to this system. I am shocked at the amount of uniformed persons involved. That there are that many sickos in the train and bus jobs or the fire department. But there are no shortage of jerks I guess.

Corruption is none of my business but they have made it my business.

Targeted individauls are the lowest level of human being I think in any countries system. The lowest class. We get treated no better than animals. Animals get treated better and they have people out to protect them if perps are caught mistreating them. We have no one looking out for us. Oh sure the perps have this sick stalker love for TI's like they are protecting them but really they abuse them or keep them with abusers in the system.

We are ignored by everyone and people that are nice to everyone else are often uncharacteristically mean to us. People are afraid of us becuz they could lose thier jobs or get targeted. No one thinks about us and if they do they hang there head becuz they are helpless to do anything.

Its just expected that there are these unfortunate creatures who are torured by the system and then destroyed. We are viewed as necessary sacrifices. People may even say that what is being done to us is wrong but they do little to act.

Something about us being targeted triggers a sick sadistic side in all humans. Like its ok for them to join in. It doestn seem to phase most people even if they would be outraged by other human rights violations.

I sincerely beleive that especially among mc slaves-tbmc survivors, intergen ones especially, we are seen as literally slaves who are very ignorant and unhappiness is a temporary state brought on by realizing how we have been denied happiness and freedom all our lives.

Like the perception of us is genuinely that people are really convinced of this. That we live to serve and this is really what we enjoy doing and once we realize that the oppression via org stalking/harassment wont let us grow up or evolve we will naturally return, willfully, to being a servant. Whether that be returning to prostitution, becoming a home health aid or caregiver, a nurse, or other slavish 'live for others' type of jobs.

The system genuinely beleives that if it wears us down enough, if it gets rid of the agression, the dominance, the strenght, the intelligence, the looks, the talent,the she wolf/warrior, any masculine qualities, the being in charge of ones sexuality, and any specialness you have- that if it only encourages the sweetness, the submissiveness, the childlikeness, the ignorance, the dependency and the helplessness, the femininity and dumbs you down with brain damage and lack of stimulation that you will eventually via torture really want to be what they want you to be. It seems that there are alot of men in on this and alot of jealous women and that is a correct perception.

These people need to return the survivor to a state of enslavement though they realize they cannot through reprogramming via a compartmentalized system.

The true, Core Self is being altered, and it is the saddest loss in the whole world.

This is why sexual stimulation is so very important. After enough humiliation, insults, and suggestions connected to sex as well as the sexual stimulation they seem to do remotely (which was a constant low level and has stopped after this writing) the female TI especially one of a highly sexed and sensual nature who has been left/betrayed by lovers and loved ones and isolated by the stalking/harassment system will begin to feel the influence of the system as if it was a lover in a forced marriage, that now after enough beating down and coercing as well as fucking the new bride is realizing, especially through sexual pleasure that she really is into this guy, that it isnt so bad and that she will now behave.

I think this is what they DONT tell you in the Taming of the Shrew. No woman, especially a strong one, would ever give in to a man via mere harassment, beatings or fighting. You would have to rape her repeatedly in order for any of that other shit to work. Women have willpower but women are in womens bodies. I have heard rape victims say the shame that goes on when thier bodies reacted to repeated rapes or even one, that thier bodies betrayed them into pleasure responses. Imagine being betrayed by your intimates, isolated and repeatedly raped by your captors. Its classic mind control.

I now believe that mind control is not possible on the level of changing someone's personality unless you use sexual stimulation. And humiliation. Raping a woman of strong will who has a masculine side who actually percieves that her vagina is impenatrable, raping her into submission would actually be like raping a man or boy. To her the act is unatural and ultimately perverse. That she has lost her 'man hood' over this.

And as far as it being remote and covert instead of directly physical and private-even if she was raped privately and physically she couled hang onto her mind or her inner will and still remain her own king of her empire and that this situation is only temporary, that she is always plotting a way out. With using the remote infuencing system as well as covert stalking/harassment and humiliation there is no way to have privacy inside as a person nor is there anyway to hold onto your mind. And there is no way to prove what has happened becuz there was no physical touching by another human.

That is why classical conditioning in the beginning is so important. That is why the female TI must be shamed and controlled by societies violent sex symbols- firemen, police men. MEN men. Men who protect, who sweat, who kill, who die,who rule the city. Civil soldiers. Societies rock'n rollers. They are involved in order to convince the stubborn woman that she is not the hero sex symbol here, THEY are and also that they have all the power and she has little chance. Might as well submit.

Now none of this would be done unless the female TI was a threat in some real way. This is not for the sake of rape and holding her hostage in itself. It serves only to silence and neutralize an enemy of someone Who Matters. Bigtime.

I am sure that the male empowerment of these actions is welcome, but they would not be able to pull this sophisticated psychological enslavement off under normal circumstances....still, needy as the men involved are for validation-so vampir like are they in the need to feed to stay strong I wonder if this is not the reason for the TI who doesnt know why they are targeted. Perhaps if they find a sexually charged female who is a threat they will start these actions against her all by themselves.

This is what makes the whole situation unlivable. It is not the harassment, the stalking, the lack of life. Even the failing health. In all these a woman warrior is left her inner dignity, her deep connection to herself to know she made the right moves and waged war in return the best she could. But them working on a womans sexuality, covertly thru remote influence tech makes any decision making difficult (distraction) and eventually the victim will find itself in the clutches of the perpetors she cannot see. She will do whatever they ask . If she has any will left she will try to commit the final act of not being used anymore which is suicide.

Are the generals of the future going to screw up the battlefield becuz they are coming in their pants and cannot concentrate? Perhaps this only works on women...and people who are depogrammed so they are directly affected by things -there is no compartments to block this influence.

It seems my experience is that they keep a low level almost constant stimulation going, and it is always acompanied by suggestion that is constantly aiming to put the victim in the control of the system somehow. Go back to prostituion but this time, now you know the way it works you should 'play ball' with the cops sexually. Or 'get put in jail, you need to go there for behavior modification. You'll be a better person when you get out.' 'Start fucking all these guys who are harassing you, you know now that they are the ultimate sexual experiences', 'Start f*cking all those black men who harass you cross the country. Get a black boyfreind. You know you like it how humiliating they are too you.' 'Just give it up to any man who wants it. Become sexually available to all men at any time....this is how women are supposed to act...used to act(ideations)', 'men rule the world', ' give in to the social services system. They have always exerted and almost sexual control over you anyway-domineering. feel the way they control you as sexual and give control over to them...let them make all the decisions for your life. (Then I get visions of me as a differnet person sitting in front of some councillor and saying 'OK whatever you think is best for me' and having like zero willpower. The lack of control is felt as a submissive sexual act. I often get a vision of this action as compared to a victim in a sexually submissive position.)'....

All of these tactics are the result of convincing the victim to give over thier will power via coercion. In these moments the low level constant sexual stimulation is ever present. It makes it difficult to say no or to fight at all. Plus you are dealing with a person who has been held captive with no love, no touch, no communication with loved ones and betrayed and hated by everyone it seems. The victim is dying to engage in sexual activity again and misses human touch like any healthy person would. Especially if the person was highly sexed, a sensualist or involved in recieving much attention all the time physically.

This would be akin to dangling a peice of food in front of someone who had been starved for along time. The hope of the torturer is that the person will give in based on the remote influences promise of touch and pleasure...it seems to also promise these things from the perps. One can tell that it is the forst step in trying to get the victim to be in with the perps on a mental level with sexual stimulation. I am sure after the victim gives in to demands the perps will physically start to approach the victim for physical activity.

Perps already try to take TI's home or get into thier pants constantly...but smart TI's know perps and can read when someone is trying to use them.

After being approached alot in the begginning by perps seeing me outwardly appearing beat down, unaware of programming internally I guess, they attempted to get me to work with them.

I acted stupid and refused. I will die before joining the system that has taken so much from me or fucking those disgusting men as they are as my Core Self.

This system, as I have watched it over the years as I have been a victim, seems to be experimenting on people who are already victimized. And especially programmed people.

When Mark Karr went in to confess to Jon Benets murder around the same time frame I was experiencing similar 'confesss by force' commands, being terrorized in every way imaginable and finally with the ideation that I should go into the Brighton police station and admit that I was a child molester and a pedophile...even when I had done nothing wrong and neither is true.

The only thing that people can accuse Mark Karr of being is weird and suspect. As for myself they could assuse me of being oversexed, having an imaginative consensual kinky sex life with my ex (not unusual for two artists with imaginations and drives), and being eccentric. This does not however make me a child predator. After years of having to run from or out manuever people trying to get me in their cars (now I think they were all child predator perps, the same ones that stalk TI's all the time) as a young pretty little girl, and my families history,( which I was never preyed upon but I was bold and I think they knew better) why in the hell would I mess with children? The only reason I would corrupt anyones kid would be to tell them to fight society and question all the answers, speak out and defend themselves. Oh, and take underpriveleged kids to museums to give them away out of that keep you down getto bs.

But this is what was being formed in my mind. And my ex I suspect had outed our sex life or sided with perps who had as me being predatory, and I noticed people in Brookline pulling that crap that all TI's talk about where people pull thier kids away from them in public or if the TI approaches they all of a sudden become concerned about where is junior and call him to thier side. Its hard to tell if these are parents who have been marketed to or if they area perps putting on a show to mind fuck the Target. Who cares? If people will not realize that a system of oppression will use whatever it has to to get rid of someone I have no patience for them anyway.

I hope that someone in a position of trusted authority gets to their family somehow and when they question corrupted authority they get ignored, messed with and thrown to the wolves...WELCOME TO THE LIFE OF A TARGETED INDIVIDUAL. If they are perps they probably f*ck up thier kids anyway as par the course.

This is why so many TI's beleive that the perps are covering for pedophiles and the biggest Satanic network in the world. If they are not satanists literally they are in nature....no that is not fair. How about sadistic network...Hateful. They are definelty that.

These are not peaceful or privacy loving satanists who want to practice a religoin that rivals the bs of Christainity. That speaks of pleasure and free will. These people are way beyond that in a negative way. Thier energy will knock you over and they psychically stink up any area they are in. What does one label that?

So Karr walks in there and everyone wonders why. He looks programmed to me. I mean I can just tell ..
I am not afraid to say that becuz on the web there are a few threads were sane people seem to think this as well.
They are experiementing on programmed people. I do not know what the value would be of convincing someone who was not a pedophile that they were one in confession. Or a murderer of children. What is this? to get programmed people to take the rap for other peoples crimes? or is it that Karr is now hated for life and always suspect? That may have been its purpose for me..that it is a dicrediting tool.

The police are so heavily involved in this..I mean its just a mess. You cant fight that, they run the damn country at this point. They have a strong union and the governement is behind them-(how can you have a union for your special interests of your group and still be employed by the city/state/govt? Isnt that....maybe they feel it protects them from the heavy hand of the governing body. I dont know.)

This long post has made me feel a bit better but my circumstances are no better and neither is the outlook. Its hard knowing that you are fighting very bad things, opression and the public treats you like a dog.
That the only people that will see thes words are perps, thier associates and other helpless Targets. Like its gonna do anything.

My case seems to match a woman named Barbra Hartwell. The types of things they did to her I have experienced. She also seems to function like a searchlight on the water in the night. Research and digging deep. But her style was too combative and she got into skirmishes with other survivors which she should have jsut turned up her nose and walked away from. I notice that alot of people used her for research and she is always dissed in the same forums that love up other survivors. Like she jsut wasnt as important.
Her last entries were that she was trying to do some lawsuit against the CIA but there wasnt enough money (and there is never going to be).
I mean I do not know if she is for real becuz all her exposure happened before I got wise to the situation. She like alot of other people WE NEED RIGHT NOW TO BE AROUND has gone into not blogging and hiding out. Great timing for me.

I just think that no one is willing to stand up for people like me and I will be damned if I ever say the letters 'CIA'. Prove it too me...no. No I want the real perps, the ones hiding behind such BS.
That "department of the CIA" that the voice speaks of in the Jim Jones documentary who allegedly opened a file on him, whom his older male friend had connections with...who seemed to be responsible for MK ultra as well. What 'department' is this? What the f*ck does one call that ?
'Special Evil Department of Psychos with Charming Sociopaths Covering Up for Them-the Sadistic Bastards Department' is what I say.

How about the 'You'll Never Catch Us Becuz You are Expendable in the Big Picture' dept? There is a keeper for you.

How about just Fuck It All.