Why I dont disclose all information

You have to understand that in my case for alot of people involved this is a game. They are either programmed family members who are supposed to harm thier own children (and they probably dont even think about why..well actulaly when asked one time this particular family member, who I when I asked her if her God would approve of what she was doing to her child or harming her own child [by helping to torture and destroy] she stated that that is something she would be forgiven for. After years of research I have found this is a typical response from a cult minded person. Its a 'text book' answer.) or they are severely f*cked up people around you who have taken full advantage of the ax coming down and are more than happy to see the results.

If I disclose what has happened fully too many of these idiots will get thier sh*t off by savoring the story as well as taking credit for everything that has happened. After people see how severe it has been,
all the people who helped pull this off are going to smile and thier smiles will only get bigger as its revealed just how destructive this all was.
Becuz it
1) gives them a sense of power
2) makes them appear dangerous
3) gives them street cred

whatever you can think of.

That is why it must always be clear that this is about something most likely intergenerational as well as a connection to my mother being a human radiation experimentee at the infamous Naval hospital connected to MK Ultra..not some rich assh*les from Boston and elsewhere.

But all the people who played a part are more than happy to take the crown for being sooo evil and such.

If I was not targeted to begin with, all these people would never have been allowed to do anything to me..not in the sheer group effort it was done in.

In the end they are to be portrayed as the cowards that they are...taking advantage of a situation and a vulnerable person.

The problem with these sorts of people is that they like to feel murderous and bad ass in thier own minds or with the protection of others.

Typically they are super dependant on either hiding thier assh*ledom and also on some outside form of support-financial or otherwise.

Becuz they are essentially 'leashed' they need to exploit someone, like me for instance, that can be viewed as say the same way as a video game. I am not real to them and I dont matter when the game is done.

Use this to your advantage--you'll know how.

However, you have to not internalize
1) what 'people' think (becuz the people dont know what the hell is going on fully)
2) and not internalize what the enemy is going to do or feel or think once you do something YOU need to do on your end, like put out information.

These types of people feel that they have won just by being privy to these proceedings. Just by feeling that you have been singled out.

Remember, their judgement system means little due to the fact that they even are knowingly in on something like this. If they were truly into focused (and I mean like a laser beam baby..one that kills with pure energy) then they would be living as gods--being happy and healthy and creative. Being their own masters.

The only perps I really respect are the sadists. At least they are living the forbidden dream and being their own gods. The sheep piss me off more than any other faction in this game. The really sick ones are focused...I said I respect their drives..I dont agree with them. The beauty of such a person is that rarely do we find true sadists who operate with sophistication and artfulness. We find some cheap sick f*cks in on a murder who smirk about it alot. Cheap and tacky.

The great thing about the true sadist is that he is so sick he is usually able to be spotted by someone perceptive. S/He stands out to those that see. And they are few and far between.

Your average shmo in on this would rat on his conspiritors in a second (thus his nature to be in on these things to begin with) or die within a week of being targeted himself. These types are part of the general public who have watched too many episodes of survivor. They are tasteless and a hopeless part of the hive mentality..and the 'artists' make good use of them readily.

And as we know, perps are just for hire whores or cult mind controlled. (But much worse than sex workers, who, if I am correct, provide you with something you called for that is pleasurable opposed to forcing you into something that is basically murder). I use the term 'whore' to mean for sale..and I need not offend sex workers everywhere. Unless you are also a perp somehow..then you are no better than the idiot out of jail trying to get a reduced sentence. STUPID.)

Remember your story is yours. Dont let the perps have it. Copyright it. Some mercenary jerk somewhere is probably just waiting to steal it.

My mind as it has been lately

I was the sort of TI in the beginning who did NOT want to deal with the reality of technologies and implants. I thought is sounded too crazy and probably didnt understand the full impact of it on being a targeted individual.


During the Bush administration the gang stalking actually became a sort of battle that I got somewhat good at. Thus I gave up who I was in order to survive and adapt.

THEN they changed to rules when OBAMA came in..we are all grateful that the totally overt and insane gang stalking has subsided but its a mindf*ck when you now have a way to ace them by becoming good at battle with them..then this part of the war stops- and they change the rules.

It is supposed to be a mindf*ck I assume becuz you are altered which is what they probably wanted. WHY? Becuz now it is easier to try to brainwash you as a target.

And how is that being done? Well, still through some gang stalking but the tech seems to be either increased to alter and brainwash and coerce into modification or else a target at this point has become brain damaged, the brain chemistry altered and may be more suggestable..perhaps a combination of the two.

A worn down damaged TI with some new way of manipulating them.

It doesnt seem that the tech is about getting me to go postal anymore, or to slice my wrists in a hotel room somwhere. The suggestion and ideation is VERY geared towards conformity and puritanism now.

And I have said before it seems that different regions want for you different things (outcomes). In NM recently it was a constant badgering (along with constant gang stalking) to conform and disappear into the society around me.
In Boston it was constant badgering to become a nurse and get a husband.

In Tucson AZ there was no ideations and suggestions but there was constant organized stalking to the point where I couldn't function anyway.(problem solved I assume).

In El Paso the suggestion is to go Christian and alot of me being out of place or needing to change and especially give up my writing.

But as I wrote the last piece on that article on the military suicides there was a very clear idea that I was indeed begging for my life and trying to kiss up to the system to survive. That I was being manipulative and that it should not be paid attention to (by whoever).

There is also this insane Christain right or some other extremist suggestion that keeps coming up lately that I come from a pedophile family and so not only do I have alot to account for with my own life (that came up in South Carolina-that I have alot to pay for or account for), that I am inherntly dangerous due to my coming from this DNA. That I am just being manipulative and whatever I do and say that seems genuinely caring or 'good' in nature should be ignored.

Now this is not the only time I have gotten these 'impressions' or whatever you'd like to call them. I have heard this right TO MY FACE FROM ANOTHER HUMAN BEING WHO KNEW ABOUT THE HARASSMENT. She intimated, just once, something about another person we knew- that "he has alot of child molestation in his family". The effect of the way it was said was that all people who have 'that' in thier families deserve to be targeted, that its a valid reason. (this is brainwashing pure and simple..to get one to believe something like that.)

Also, I wont get into it, but there was an attempt that is very er, how should I put this..complicated, to get me over time to go into Brighton police station (around 2004 or so?) and admit I had done something like this. A false confession, and there was another person in the news who I and others suspect is programmed who made a false confession publically WITHIN THE SAME TIME FRAME.

This 'bad seed' nonsense is never going to work on me but it is psychological torture and its only purpose is to shut me up about various things--especially programming and mind control I assume.
Let me tell you why the system fears people who come from evil THAT CANT BE MANAGED becuz their nature comes out somehow more gentle than thier family or the perp in the family.
BECUZ WE CAN SEE WHAT EVIL DOES AND THE WAY THE CONS WORK. THUS IF WE WORK FOR GOOD OR REFORM THEY HAVE A FORMIDABLE ENEMY MORE DANGEROUS THAN NAIVE DO GOODERS EVER WILL BE. The corrupt system hates people who want to get out or turn over a new leaf.

This is why they have to re comprimise you.

Also its part of the PR campaign to cover ass for the real criminals who can hide behind money and connections and a 'good' family.

My old landlady used to let this crazy infamous druggie around Allston-Brighton get away with way too much in the building I lived in (335 Washington St Brighton MA). Her excuse was that "well she comes from a 'good' family, she just got into the drugs and couldnt stop". Knowing what I know about Boston, MA, USA a 'good' family is a rich and/or political one and that is all the credentials that are needed. The kids can be f*ck ups as long as the family has cred.

This lets me know that if THAT can be used to get someone OFF the hook then it can conversely be used to off someone in a PR campaign. This is also its purpose I believe in my case.

Dangerous, from a bad family etc.

Now, if some extremists somewhere actually believe this then they have a perfect specimen to reform. Or it could just be all the set ups make the target believe this and then its easier to use suggestion on them as you behavior modify them for other reasons.

We are going to go deep and we are going to change you, that is the way it seems to be going.

The problem is that I didnt need this to 'change'.
I needed to not be harassed and I needed therapists to do thier jobs. I needed people to be honest with me.
I needed that psychologist from St E's to NOT tell me in her heavy Russian accent that I shouldnt go to a hypnotist becuz "..that would bring up much memory for you", and a week later tell me that her diagnoses of me was that I was "beautiful and lazy".
I should have went to the hypnotist but I was too harassed to do ANYTHING.
I needed support. Not a frame up.

So therefore I will never BE altered the way the system would like by this sort of action. WHY? Becuz it is an untruth. It was wrong to begin with.

Thier system is in ERROR from the start. That cannot be allowed to flourish into anything. It is of the utmost importance that the truth be shown..things as they really are.

JAMA March 18, 2009 Soldier suicides on the rise

JAMA (Journal of the American Medical Association) March 18, 2009

The article says that many soldiers won't seek help due to the stigma of the mental health system.

Great..and they are soldiers so guess what? They know all about horrors and psych warfare and all the things that we go thru (except the horror of live battle which is really a trade off. TI's lose everything and become tortured prisoners and at least these soldiers have buddies, co workers, families and girlfriends.) They also know that the public have no idea about the experience of a battle situation much less it being a constant ongoing thing.

There fore how could they get help? What would people think? Also its probably not thier way to let the public know how unromantic and heroic war really is..something that's very important lately with the general public being in the modern world very naive about death and true violence. Video games and world of crap craft are VERY different than live action.

Memories can be compartmentalized for 30 years...just like with programmed individuals.

Perhaps alot of these people have memories compartmentalized and cant handle facing them head on. The memories run themselves over and over and there seems to be no control over this process.

Its also very hard for a person who is young to go thru this when their life experience isn't formed yet. Part of thier youth becomes these experiences.

I wonder if its not just the traumatic events they see but how they themselves are traumatized, especially during training. This is perhaps why certain people are selected for mind control programming from inter generational family lines, strangely there seems to be that most survivors have healers in their families or some psychic prowess. Perhaps there is an element of self healing involved, which I have read the military are investigating trying to create a self healing soldier for the future.

Why did my psychiatrist play games with the idea of me having PTSD and not do her job UNTIL she had to turn on me. Then I got this letter with PTSD as a diagnoses, where we had discussed it once and her reply was "well, you could have it" but it was like a joke to her. Like she was playing games. The letter also said other things that were NEVER discussed between us and was NOT part of my prior diagnoses on paper--ever. People were warning me that she was not doing her job and something was wrong.

The letter basically was a math equation that = "this girl is going to snap". I was smart enough to see the set up as well as the fact that she left me some open doors in the letter, knowing me for years she perhaps still sympathized with me and knew I would know how to use the way she wrote the letter to my advantage..though the letter does say on face value what the perps would want it to say.

There is ALOT of interest in PTSD and I don't trust this at all. Not with what I have seen in my own family and the military's record with human experimentation.

It could also be that we live in a world with SO much realistic information at hand that these soldiers simply know too much. They know the full reality of what is happening to them and the enemy..its not like the old days where you could go into ignorance or denial in YOUR little part of the country with your family or friends and leave it all behind.

The article also says that they have to be afraid of guerrilla attacks every day. TI's know that one, psychological attacks anyway. The only difference is that they are not alone when it occurs I am assuming.

Isolating the victim makes alot of difference.

What is so wrong is that they cant get adequate care. But then, these people are supposed to all, potentially not return alive mind you. Perhaps the attitude is 'EXPENDABLE' as far as being human being.

This is the business of wars.

We live in a ridiculous society where people support wars, cry about the results, and then slide right back into PC bs by whining about fixing what is done to human beings during wars.

Neatly compartmentalized and placed hate and sentiment.

There is alot of experimentation with stress going on obviously.

If you are a soldier here is what I have to say to you.

I don't like wars, I am a woman and an artist. This is the typical stance of a person like me historically. However I have a very war like side. My grandparents met in the Marines during WW II. Before I got targeted into being destitute, one of my goals was to volunteer with vets as a way to clear my hatred and misunderstanding of my grandfather.

As an old man he still would become nervous if half asleep in his den chair at the simply clicking on of a certain light switch. I could see the look of 'this is it I am gonna die now' in his eyes. He told me the light sounded like a certain kind of gun clicking and he would kid me he thought I was a Jap or German.

He was given pain killers once for heart surgery and in his sleep tried to strangle my grandmother. Later he said he had memories from the war and that "I saw men die I aint seen die in 50 years and I don't wanna see it again".

This tells me that the reality of his youth was part of the reality of his life FOR LIFE. It also tells me his memories were compartmentalized.

I don't agree with what the US asks of you but I do believe in free will and if you chose to be part of this then it is up to you.

IF you feel you are going to do something like suicide keep in mind that there might be some human experimentation going on. You could even be targeted by the tech that is used on TI's. You could have your situation complicated by having been exposed to drugs or chemicals. I met a man from Desert Storm that had a rash that never went away and he said it was from his time over there. That everyone got exposed to something.

Now there is just the psychology of the human mind to deal with.
If you are afraid to seek help publicly or on paper try to find some sort of grey area, like other soldiers, older soldiers, some sort of therapist who would perhaps do it on the quiet.
I am used to getting around systems, it is part of my programming and part of the way I have survived being targeted. You are probably, from what I recall from the way my family did things, used to following a system to survive.
Part of coming out of being conditioned is to think for yourself. You may have to do that to get the help you need.

If you keep it inside it will work on you until you do suicide. There is not need for disclosure or groups. There has got to be a way for you to get what you need without personal risk to you and your career.

Drugs and drink and violence will only band aid the problem or make suicide more attractive.

But remember one thing. Humans die and humans kill. People have been doing this for thousands of years and you are not the first dirty dirty dog on this planet.
I am not a man. I have no idea about the way men process thier emotions or ideas or experiences.
But self healing may be helpful. How men do it I dont know.

Suicide is IN ANY CASE, giving the world what it wants. THAT would be the ultimate surrender to what is now the internal enemy. They got rid of another victim witness to war and death. They got rid of another soldier who grew up and now rallies against wars in his later years.

Also your brain chemistry is most likely altered from battle especially re deployments..over and over.

I believe that there is something in there about how to get confidential care.
And it could be that certain soldiers are actually trying to be RESPONSIBLE by suiciding. They are trained and they know this. Perhaps if the pressure gets too much they feel that opposed to hurting others, they would take thier own lives.

And ultimately, it may be that a soldier actually would end up breaking the very conditioning that keeps him/her in shape and programmed for battle if they went outside that 'system' and started leaking memories. Perhaps they fear they will be non functional if they 'talk'.

All I know is that I dont like and am suspect of the high suicide rates, with all the other things that seem to be going on.

The tough guy thing is great, especially to keep functioning. But suicide is pretty much the end. Its not always the military's theatre. You are an individual in this body on this earth. Your life is YOUR theatre. Don't let anyone rob you of that.

The manipulative ad during the war for the army that said "There is a difference between getting over and getting over yourself"..well now its time to get back into Your Self.
You are not the property of the core or the military for life as they would love you to believe.
I see human experimentation is an arrogant statment to just that ' we can do what we like with soldiers and thier families'. Whatever.

Inside you somewhere there must be part of yourself that didn't get taken hostage by your circumstances. That you saved just for yourself. Or perhaps you can go inside yourself and seek a certain calm that is in there.

They took your youth, don't let them take your life as well.

Swine flu...who's afraid of the big bad pig virus?

I am down near the border. I am a few streets from Juarez actually. There has been one death in Houston and 70 reported cases in USA. NY, OH, CA, IN etc.

This is a good lesson in media manipulation as well as the power of fear mongering. Also, this is where seasoned TI's who have had to use critical thinking under duress will survive this easily.

You just have to look at the circumstances..
Firstly, the one death that occured was-? fill in the blank: Yes, a weak little baby. I hate to be hard but in order to survive TI's have had to be..realists. Usually in these sort of cases the people who get hit hardest are the elderly, the very young and immuno deficient. Yes, this is striking healthy people BUT SO DOES THE REGULAR KIND OF FLU.

In other words if you aint afraid of the regular flu then it seems this one is acting the same. They are making it out to be like a plague or AIDS or something using manipulative tactics.

Actually, I already had something where I was nausoues for a few days and had a bad ass headache with nasal stuff going on. And it went away and came back again. I took herbs, cleaned ot my digenstive tract and lived on Ensure for a time. Vit c, goldenseal the whole bit.

I dont do flu shots, being a target we all know what that might consist of..for individuals as well as the population (now that we have experienced what can be done to just the individual we can imagine what else goes on).

Having had the flu a few times before I did indeed feel like I was going to die. It is a week long of testing the bodies limits. The insanity during fever is unpleasant for sure and the pain..why is it so painful? I can imagine from this experience that it would kill someone who was weak and not in 'fighting' shape.

Having the flu is like having a down and dirty fight with a virus. And you become very babyish. Its definetly forgetting how tough you are and regressing to " I want Teddy bear, I want mommy and I want my man" mode. All you need is love through this probably-to be babied. However, this new flu might be dangerous I dont know becuz I dont care.

But get informed by reading up on it before you freak out. Not from the fear mongering news but from university websites or sources medical people use. THYE WANT TO SELL NEWS NOT HELP YOU.

Probably the worst LSD experiment ever (humor)

Some humor fer ya:

Torture of Falun Gong practitioners is similar in practice to gang stalking of Targets..this also illustrates the system IS indeed in existence

..only its used here in the USA on TI's.

But now I understand the mechanics of it better and it explains why there are so many criminals in on this as well as cops ..and seemingly probation officers and the corrections system in general. vindicta

http://clearharmony.net/articles/200710/41731.html

"Descriptions of some of the brutal brainwashing methods:
1. The prison authorities force practitioners to watch DVDs slandering Falun Gong and the founder of Falun Gong, Teacher Li Hongzhi. They try to force them to verbally abuse Falun Gong, try to force them to sing the songs that pay tribute to the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) and compel practitioners to report their "new understanding" of Falun Gong in writing after they have been subjected to brainwashing. If a practitioner was unable to write after being tortured, she had to find someone to write a report on her behalf.

2. The prison guards slander Falun Gong and Teacher at the brainwashing sessions and in private or open meetings. Sometimes the guards would appear to be hypocritical by saying, "You should have [the right to] your own ideology and your own thoughts." However, once practitioners confirmed their faith in their writings, the guards would quickly make an about-face and escalate the persecution.

3. The prison authorities assign criminal inmates such as thieves, murderers and drug addicts, who are eager to earn sentence reductions, as "personal monitors" to watch practitioners. Practitioners are forbidden to talk, practise the Falun Gong exercises, study the Falun Dafa teachings, go to the toilet, get lunch, or even take a walk. Criminals are encouraged to be in close contact with prison officials and to report any and all of th practitioners' actions. Other inmates are banned from having any contact with, providing help to, or sympathising with practitioners, or even from standing beside a practitioner. Otherwise, they will be warned or threatened with longer sentences. Still, many criminals who have learned the truth of Falun Gong and the persecution, secretly respect, encourage, and even help practitioners.

4. The prison utilises collaborators to badger practitioners to "reform."
5. The prison deceives practitioners by offering sentence reductions if they write the Three Statements. Some practitioners did so, and as a result, they suffered from even more ruthless persecution at the hands of the prison authorities.

6. Prison guards openly spread rumours that practitioners do not care for their families and relatives. The prison has opened a "family phone line," but practitioners are prevented from using it because they are banned from phoning their families. They are also not allowed to have any family visitations, to accept any money their families might bring them, to exchange letters with their family, or to receive any daily provisions from their family members. The prison officials keep practitioners completely cut off from their families.

7. Prison guards inspect letters written by practitioners. Letters cannot be mailed out without official permission.
8. Those who refuse to be "reformed" have to listen to the guards' berating, threats, and verbal abuse. Those practitioners are banned from having any connection with their families, are handcuffed, locked in an isolation cell, and have no communication with the outside world or other people for a long time.

After eight years of abuse and torture, one practitioner became mentally traumatised and several others lost their mental abilities to function normally. Many practitioners suffered from severe depression after their release.

Tue Meiling, a former employee of the Lingwu City Medical Company, used to be a healthy, lively and intelligent woman. In 2003, she was sentenced to three years in prison and held at the Yingchuan Women's Prison. The guards attempted to force her to "reform," but she did not cooperate. She refused to wear a prison uniform and to memorise the prison rules. This resulted in Ms. Tue being handcuffed and locked in an isolation cell, and she was banned from any communication with anyone else. Due to this ongoing physical abuse and mental torment, her mind was sometimes clear and sometimes not. Although her condition meant she was disqualified for incarceration, the prison authorities did not release Ms. Tue. Instead, they put her on heavy medication for mental disorders, which led to a profound mental disorder. She was released for outside hospitalisation at the Ningan Hospital and had to endure additional torture in the hospital. People who knew her before are shocked at how emaciated she has become.
As a result of brutal "reform" measures, a formerly healthy and lively individual suffered a mental collapse. This is a reflection of the twisted minds of the prison authorities and guards." vindicta

This is so similar its frightening. It shows that a similar system does exist. However, the gs system seems to function around a TI wherever they end up where this comprimised population exists, even being approached in public spaces consistently.

I cried when I read the bit about criminals learning the truth about practitioners and then secretly respecting, sympathizing and assisting them. This would explain the criminals I have encountered who seem to be helpful and leak info that is valuable.

Recent news on torture methods disclosure (official line) April 09

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/northamerica/usa/barackobama/5167884/Barack-Obama-discloses-Bush-torture-methods-including-use-of-insects.html

http://english.aljazeera.net/news/americas/2009/04/2009423145748353446.html
NPR:
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=103447118

Telegraph UK:
http://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/con_coughlin/blog/2009/04/21/my_advice_to_obama_dont_pick_a_fight_with_dick_cheney

Not doing well--still stuck in TX

I keep ending up back in the same place as it is somewhat social and the least harassment I get anywhere. But there are health issues. I often dont feel well..I may be fond of Mexican culture but I have to be realistic..I dont have a Mexican stomach. (by the way for any American who has a problem with Mexicans, I have a wake up call for you. ALL Mexicans are NATIVE to the land theylive on..Mexico/central north america. Can YOU say the same? Unless you have native american in your family line shut the hell up. They are part of the orginal indiginous population of this land. The very concept of them 'invading the usa' is so ironic that its laughable. But this is the kind of fantasy that America is about and this country lives in. Disney World is great..screw the natives though. Go straight to Hell. Alot of them in, say, NM will say they are Spanish and not native. This is typical of the ignorance that the oppressors wants to keep everyone in..for them to not understand they are native. Look in the mirror. Unless you look Spanish from Europe, yer native American..just from way more south than the natives from say New Mexico.

I cannot believe how humans judge according to the false hoods that are imposed that are illogical upon examination. The lines on the map are real, the false man made enviroment is ALL.
Bull shit. Open yer f*cking eyes.)

Anyway, I like this culture and its curiosities. Lokita and saying someone is 'crazy' is not going to get you medicated or sent to a counselor. It is simply the idea that you are off today or some of your behaviors are eccentric. Its actually sort of funny. Locita is a pet term for woman who are off the wall or crazy in what used to be 'a good way' ( or creative) before the USA proper turned into a paranoid, totally controlled society.

Thier perception of hygiene is circa 1976 and no one dies readily due to this. El Paso in general is like that. Up north no one dares to drink from someone's soda or drink anymore..unless they have been intimate lately.

And they arent insane about thier kids getting hurt. And thier kids are generally happy babies I have observed. Not long faced and depressed in the stroller already (like Boston or Cambridge for instance).

Monkeys are a strangely popular stuffed animal and in caricutures for ads....as teddy bears are in the USA. People are referred to as monkey as a pet term. Chango or Changa.

The men are very concerned with being, well manly but not with the obnoxious intrusiveness that american males seem to have. They dont show off for me by being annoying..they show off for thier wives and girlfriends. This must mean they are somehow more secure in their manhood than other types of men.
And they arent trying to talk to me every 2 minutes in hopes of eventually wearing me down til one of the tribe 'gets with me'. This culture knows how to politely mind its own business.
There is an innate class in this culture, a way of handling oneself, even among the poorest I have seen in El Paso.
I havent gone over the border, sadly due to my situation I feel its too risky.

Is it dangerous?..probably. Is it psychically, mentally and emotionally as dangerous as mixing with other cultures in this country?..HELL NO. There is no breaking and entering of the soul or one's mind.

However, due to the language barrier I am intellectually stifled. Its lonely, but I have done lonely all my life anyway.

The Catholicism is familiar but annoying. Yet another culture that isnt afraid to have a female deity with some power..like Italy or Celtic..oops I mean Ireland (wink).
You can see the churches influence on the native population and it is sad to watch. Like other cultures such as Italy they retain thier character however.

They are racist at times. They refer to me as Gringa at times. I dont mind this. I am sick of the USA with its 'we all have to get along' BS, while all the while corruption continues and gang stalking destroys lives. But they always ask me if I have eaten, or why I dont feel well. I get lots of smiling at my attempts to cpmmunicate in only a very limited konwledge of words.

However the problem is where I am. Its targeted no doubt.
Its hard. Its the safest place I have stayed, yet I cant get anything done there and if I go up into the US, I get harassed almost constantly.

I am tolerant and appreciate people putting good energy forward if that is what THEYwant to do with thier lives. However, you know what will happen if any religion gets too close to me internally. Its leave or die over the border somewhere.
I keep thinking maybe the pyramids down in Mexico city. Its such a shame I want to see that.

And to die there is so...much better than dying just randomly somewhere.

So I am not quite sure what to do. I know the gs in the south west is always going to be constant and the shelters are sh*t. California is a nightmare. There really is no safe place to go.

Which is totally unfair, none of this should have ever happened.
The gang stalking system over a lifetime and over many years of intensity recently has made me weak. Physically mentally and emotionally.
I am a smart strong female of an athletic build. The oppression I have encountered has served to make me average or below average probably in ever aspect of my life.

The perps, who all live in a cult mind controlled fantasy world, will see only the product of thier oppression of someone. They never dare to think what you could have been had you not been enslaved your whole life and now gang stalked heavily.

THEY ARE NOT REALISTS. Nor are they able to use their imaginations as they should.

They are not the kind who have total control of their perceptions which is why they HAVE to attack people wh0 do.

A true grown up on this planet, sees the moon at night and knows according to science that it is only appearing to shine due to the fact the sun is on the other side of the earth reflecting on it.
That it is only a dead rock and that it is the earths satellite. Once all the realism of the situation is taken into consideration, then one has earned the right to relax and enjoy illusion. Then one can be an innocent resident of earth and see how beautiful the moon looks in the sky tonite. How it appears to only be a sliver like Cheshire cat smiling on Alice.

You have a right to highly intelligent, realistic, scientific and ALSO an artist and a sensualist.

The culture we live in now hates artists, hates sensualists, hates the truly 'sexy' people of the world in favor of silicone jobs and plastic surgery. They hate the truly hateful, the passionate, the truthful, the honest. There seems to be a paranioa about people who can control thier perceptions and use critical thinking.

I once pointed out to a few people that thier classes in a certain subject would feed into other subjects, the way the old masters were astute at math science and art etc. \
This concept seemed unthought of by most people. They think (are trained to think) Devinci etc are isolated genuises...all that crap from public school history books. Notice how the only presidents you really have to know are on your money?
Anyway, this is not so. Its that everything in this culture is compartmentalized and you are supposed to only percieve things the way it is presented.

I cannot believe that the whole culture is basically compartmentalized and people dont seem to grow out of it. Its bizarre.

A TI is not a stupid person usually. And programmed people are certainly not so.
targets are oppressed thier whole lives into not expressing themselves, not speaking out, not growing, not forming and not becoming anything at all really.

The things they do to a Target are so abusive and cruel, torture really to maintain control, that other people would have folded by now--and they know it. That is why it must be denied and kept secret...so it stays out of the public's mental filters. So its too much for them to handle and they just turn away. Ignore, deny.

Often the person is broken down into being of lowered intelligence, lessened beauty, dead spiritually or compliant with some popular religion instead of independant study...
this is all in the interest of what I last posted.

To destroy so as to reform the person. Its cult mind control and that is all it is.
It has no other value other than that.

The system is most likely supported by people who have alot to hide when it comes to the TI and dont want to be exposed and pay for what they did. Its a way for everyone to get off on the cheap by using abusing a human being, then brainwashing them into forgetting.

Then all the sick f*cks can say that person is 'happy now' and doing well.

I know this is what is planned for me and I wont have it. I will never ever give in to this sort of coercion.
All they can do is waste my time everyday to ensure I get now where or build anything for myself. For thier purposes this is enough.

I feel that everyone who is in on what is happening to the TI is under mind control themselves and either doesnt percieve this or refuses to on some level.

Control freaks rarely want to look at thier own issues.

There is a definate feeling I am getting that someone somewhere is convinced its almost sell out time for me. Weakened, older, failing. Perhaps this is what people wish opposed to what is really true.
We also have an entire generation out there under 25 who are heavily into gs it seems who are incapable of independant thought as well as lack the capacity to use thier imagination. My new motto is 'Dont trust anyone under 36'....ok maybe 30. Maybe.

Most likely they are brainwashed into acting this way and arent old enough to know it yet. I
I feel bad for younger TI's who

Good resource on mind control techniques-The Battle for Your Mind by Dick Sutphen

http://www.whale.to/w/mind.html

So much of this is what organized stalking and harassment is about. Especially those of us who had to be "made manageable" by rich, powerful or connected people.

And the perps will put a TI through all these things and it can come in any form.

But the gang stalkng itself IS mind control according to these techniques.

Gang stalking uses other things as well that are not mentioned but its all towards the same end.
(This article was reproduced in Fact, Fiction and Fraud in Modern Medicine in February 1999 )

By the way this is why so many TI's kill themselves:
"The Birth of Conversion
CONVERSION is a "nice" word for BRAINWASHING and any study of brainwashing has to begin with a study of Christian revivalism in eighteenth century America. Apparently, Jonathan Edwards accidentally discovered the techniques during a religious crusade in 1735 in Northampton, Massachusetts. By inducing guilt and acute apprehension and by increasing the tension, the "sinners" attending his revival meetings would break down and completely submit. Technically, what Edwards was doing was creating conditions that wipe the brain slate clean so that the mind accepts new programming. The problem was that the new input was negative. He would tell them, "You're a sinner! You're destined for hell!"
As a result, one person committed suicide and another attempted suicide. And the neighbors of the suicidal converts related that they, too, were affected so deeply that, although they had found "eternal salvation," they were obsessed with a diabolical temptation to end their own lives. "

They know..they know exactly what they are doing and the choice is to convert to a new belief system put forward by the perps or to kill yourself.

This is not freedom. This is not civil rights and this is not legal and if it is that needs to change.

Human rights violations are never heeded as you can read by what goes on.

ONgangstalking getting too big? Tell me

How many of you think this blog is now too big and would be too confusing for new TI's or anyone for htat matter to naviate through?

The Prisoner: a cute spoof

For those of you who can see the unfortunate similarities between The Prisoner and being targeted, especially for survivors of tbmc this may be a welcome bit of humor..or just for Prisoner fans in general.

Had to leave Albuquerque back to elswhere, Christianity still being pushed

When I move up into the states again its all a strip mall look in all those cities. And the shelters of the SW are very into Christianity as social control within New Mexico and Tucson AZ.
The good thing about this is that if you can find a place that (claims) to not take govt monies there is less harassment if any at all.
The only problem usually is the population are either jail types who either know your story or are out to get something by messing with you. It is a negative population usually who are not out to do anything spectacular in life (like write or accomplish) but want to continue thier delusional trips concerning thier own life time psuedo bad assness within that demographic... jerk offs is what I mean and they are a pain in the ass. Petty criminals suck. They get in the way when dealing with the real a-holes of this world...I am sure the bigger people and cops know this and that is why this population is utilized readily.


Their lifestyle choice as well as thier incarcerations in a mind control enviroment (prison) makes them an already 'brain washed' population. Quite useful. If you can keep them feeding into that environment then they will never wake up.
The ones from prison seem almost beyond help as far as being conditioned.

This is why it is the goal of organized stalking and harassment to get the TI into prison or at least into the shelter system. There is a population that is utilized to further condition the victim as well as 'keep you down' with thier mentality and behavior.

Christianity and saintliness are being pushed very much so through feelings and ideations. It is simply a continuation of the direct (and obnoxious) interaction with real life gang stalking perps years ago. There was a whole little phase they went through where they seemed to intimate God was involved..maybe for them. But perhaps it was a psy ops or the militaries documented tech called 'the voice of God' that they are having interaction with.
I think they were full of sh*t actually and they are cult mind controlled organized stalkers with varying motives for thier actions..none of which are my concern.


It is only to serve to manage the TI. No one should force anyone into a religious choice . NEVER MAKE DECISIONS DUE TO LIVING UNDER DURESS.
This is part of the mechanics of brainwashing.

I am tolerant of Christians but I am an advocate of man's free Will and self governance in personal affairs. Especially due to the fact that I had a life plan for myself back in Brighton that consisted of me becoming a counselor and part time artist. That seems pretty balanced.

The main goal here is to make it appear that the Target was a horrible and screwed up person and is now reformed. I AM SURE THE REFORMATION WOULD BE ATTRIBUTED TO THIS SYSTEM of behavior modification BEING USED NOT TO THE INNER NATURE OF THE VICTIM/TARGET being responsible for any show of goodness or decency.

It is a con to sell whatever they are selling as far as behavior modification.


t has been said by a couple on Youtube, one of which is a high profile survivor that MK Ultra has connection with the system that is being used now for behavior modification and that system is being pushed as the future of reform of prisoners and mental patients.


And obviously The INCONVENIENT ..like victim witnesses for instance.

This would seem a logical reason to have to make the TI seem horrible in the first place.

They dont want anyone knowing that its being abused or that its used on people who are already 'good' or had good intent with thier life plan. If cops are in the picture then you have a ready made clinically paraniod, jaded population with a limited scope and philosophy of life that says

"All people lie, criminals are strictly this way or that, the system knows best and people dont change"....true. Considering that most cops seem to behave the same way everywhere I have travelled, I can pretty much bet on that point of view and use it against the very people who seem to subscribe to it.

Problem is, what happens when that jaded attitude is used to frame someone who is NOT a career criminal...by authorities themselves. Cops dont change and they are the criminals minds in these circumstances. And they take pay offs and protect people they feel more comfy with and who are 'like them' moreso...lifetime career criminals.

So is the cop of the future or the prison worker of the future going to simply help this system we are in to function? Are they testing this system on crooked cops to see if true life time career criminal minded people can be altered through behavior modification?


I am not naive. I understand that crime is not curable it must be managed. But the system has GONE TOO FAR with the tech capacity it now has. If the system wants to reform people that is one thing..a lofty goal of science and medical people. But let it into the hands of criminals and like minded individuals (cops, military etc) then there is a conflict for sure.

The system is extending business as usual via new tech. B*llshit.

We are talking about a world where a person wrongly 'imprisoned' cannot have his own mind, his own thoughts or his own feelings. We very likely talking about the results of MK Ultra being used to serve the systems ongoing and never ending corruption.

The arrogance has gone to far out of balance this time. They ask too much.

What are they making guarentees that it will only be used in special cases, like people who need reforming becuz they are programmed? That is not what is being said by people more knowledgeable than I if thier info is right.

Its being said that in the future if you are inconvenient, then you will be altered by this system even if it should be illegal.

The problem is that we are in a strang area right now.

Populations of the past like 'wavies ' , human experimentees, wrongly imprisoned inconvenient people if they can piece their cases together enough now have the ability to at least show example that such things are possible through tech.

One has only to put into the equation that more complex systems would be classified/hidden somehow and also that humans will abuse and misuse for thier own purposes (read a history book) to suggest that this is all possible.

The question is, like any criminal that has the best of you, its an arrogant "so watcha gonna do abowt it?"
Expose expose expose. Its no wonder that the perps hate exposure and they hate cameras and voice recorders.. They refer to a smart TI with gear as "this one is sneaky"...uh excuse me, who's life is being controlled here? (a-holes).
They are so cult mind controlled into the group mentality that they see nothing else. This human force as well as what seems like the abuse of tech is used on the victim..for behavior modification as well as supression of the person and any possible life plan they have.

This shows that what THEY are up to is sneaky. This also illustrates that exposure to a certain level is what is effective. At a higher level one would need to prove all of these claims and that is something they know caps off the problem. This is why they are not worried about any break in thier plans or about TI disclosure.

They arrogantly believe that the people will not stand up to them
the law makers will not face them
and that the system not only backs them but depends on them for its existence and survival.

The fact that all these people who are way worse than the TI get paid off and risen above thier circumstances shows that a judgement of crime or moral character have little to do with any decisions about who exactly needs modifying.

In Albuquerque there was the WORST ideations to date on giving up and personal worth..as well as to compare that to the social enivironment around the TI to get assimulation/conformity. Harassement into conforming into a social norm to manage an inconvenient victim witness.

Destruction of identity and personal values.

I have gone elsewhere and Christianity is being pushed. This is distressing but not so much as complete obliteration of the self.

There was something about Albuquerque NM that was very disturbing. It has a quality of averageness to it that seemed almost compulsory. Like it was law or something. As if everyone was making such an effort NOT to stand out against social norms, being from Boston to me this itself stood out as..well, odd.

There is something eerily 'average' about the manner of dress, of decor, of style of cars, of speech, of archetecture. I noticed the homeless people were dressed not to stand out, even the drunks. Everyone wore clothes that just did NOT stand out. The buildings all look like a massive strip mall everywhere you go.


It has to be one of the worst locations to get targeted in. It was awful. And I recall that was the bus station during my ealier travels where security people were actually sitting down with perps at a table. I think I have it on tape.
When I went to leave this one security guy was searching my stuff and started talking about pot, like it was supposed to mean something to me.

You know what means something to me? What this is really about? MK Ultra and the abuse of tech to protect criminals and frame people.
Its also the bus station where this bus load of blacks from Memphis Tenn finally got off and left me like nothing happened. That was the one where this one girl actually said to another person on the bus " You know that woman we was supposed to make feel bad or whatever? They say she aint got nothin and she's like 30 years old. I got me two babies and a house full o stuff". At that moment I had the attitude that if she is that 'ignant' about what truly matters in life, and this is the life she chooses, then she can have her 'stuff'...as for the 2 kids, well unfortunatley there are no laws against who can and cannot breed. Which there should be according to IQ tests and personality profiling. After what I have seen over the last few years.

Yes, she actually admitted that she is doing this on order and for hire.
That also tells me that they do not indeed know thier targets and they believe anything they are told, which of course they re iterate to make themselves feel better.

There are actually people who believe that the TI is being changed for the better or will come along way after years of this torture.
After what I have seen, the TI 'growing up' or 'coming a long way' is actually, in a sane persons perspective, being dumbed down, losing intelligence, and conforming due to being brainwashed over time.

The TI is simply brought down to THIER level...that is ALL.

Forgetfulness due to brain damage and torture does not equal an evolution of man or individual. It equals the neutralization of the target.

Do not ever 'forget' about what they have done to you. Though refuge is attractive it is also certain death for the Truth and Justice.

Viewing the TI as an idiot or incompetent may be a foothold for perp influence of the public

You have to understand that your average person is stuck in a certain mentality.

Not everyone has an artistic nature or is eccentric or avante guard. These sorts of people cannot figure out why other people are incompetent or seem 'stupid' to them.

Its becuz they exist in the very reality that is daily validated by every ad, every article, every news report..the false generated environment in general.

These kinds of people are usually not artistic so from the get go there is not going to be any kind of understanding of you as a TI and especially if you are a survivor of programming.

These types cant figure out how someone like me for instance turns out to be very smart.

They have no talent or family line connection to the arts, the occult, or high intellectual pursuits. Their understanding of our world is very limited. To most of us THEY seem retarded not the other way around.

They can be ignored in our worlds..until they are put upon you within the context of gang stalking.

They are quite useful to the perpetrators who know damn well that you cant program stupid people. Most survivors of tbmc are highly intelligent as well as creative and can think in the abstract. However, Targets are usually at a great disadvantage somehow and whatever is the vulnerability then it will be exploited.
The public cannot understand why you fell into these traps or why you handle things the way you do. Often, these thick heads or 'normals' who judge solely by the cultures values and aren't smart enough to suspect or even see that there is info missing in the equation so therefore there is a mystery or question as to what is really transpiring.
They often make a quick judgment like you are an idiot, simply stupid or undereducated, underclass- whatever.

The problem with being a TI is that you cant really let anyone new get to know you and/or are often around people beneath your level, like the thick heads.
If you have a conversation with these people, eventually you will find that alot of what comes out of your mouth is way above their heads.
And if you encounter educated college types who think you are simply uneducated, there will be things about you that are above them in a way that colors outside the lines and therefore they wont want to see it anyway.
All these types of people are firmly in the system we live in and they like thier place in it. They see themselves as winners, and the system backs them up.

There is no accounting for taste jsut as there is no accounting for these people being the way they are. However, they are very useful to the oppressive system against a TI. If you do show high intelligence, they wont be able to keep up anyway or relate and they will simply go back to the negativity in your situation becuz its all they can understand.

They live in the box and don't see outside it.

I reacted to the ridiculous "think outside the box" and invented "there is no box"...becuz there really isnt. This is pure corporate loaded language brainwash. THEY invented it so THEY can have it.

The main thing you have to remember is to refuse thier reality. If you are a very abused TI then you realize that the system has asked too much of you and left you no choice but to act.

This is not a rebellion against social norms either, firstly becuz what happens to TI's isnt normal and secondly ANY reactionary attitudes only validates the power structure.

I dont even think that these types can fathom what is going on and if you tried to describe what was happening to you even in the simplest terms of psychology which is a socially acceptable subject, they would not be able to relate at all. To them, there is only 'the way life is' or 'this is the way things are'. Either that or they are of average intelligence and average life experience and will not be able to understand what you are going through. They jsut arent there.

Just the gang stalking level is not going to be understood unless workplace mobbing is familiar to them, forget about psy ops which even though its documented, to them it goes on elsewhere. And to try to explain programming of mind controlled slaves to anyone other than other survivors, artists, scientists or computer programmer types who deal with systems, the very CONCEPT I think is just not even able to be introduced. You HAVE to be able to think IN THE ABSTRACT and I now see alot of people cant.

This is why its so important to get the TI away from thier own kinds of people or thier friends and intimates. The people you will end up around are part of your slow demise. They will wear down your artistic ability and intellectual abilities becuz you now have no one to talk to or relate to. Just like a prison.
And it ads to your humiliation and the destruction of your self image becuz you are surrounded by people who only know part of the story that is negative and only see you as an idiot.

And people hate incompetence in thier world and thier lives so they may see you as a symptom of that just becuz you are presented that way.

Do not forget who is doing the presenting of you and a false image.

Also do not forget your true right to privacy. The people who are not connected to these affairs should stay unconnected to these affairs IN YOUR MIND. Disregard them totally as they have no value in any of what is really going on and see they dont even have enough information to make informed judgments as they do not even know about the presence of missing information.

They have no bearing on what is transpiring for Targeted Individuals unless one day they decide to do some serious homework about what really goes on in the world they live in, instead of just taking the prefab version from the producers of our culture.

Part of organized stalking is to get you to INTERNALIZE social norms and that includes the opinions or feelings of the public.
Why should you internalize something that has nothing to do with you? And also this is an attempt to force you to 'lose' all the missing information that they do not have.

For me I know that its hopeful I will 'know my place' ' accept my situation' and most likely assimilate to the norm as defined by society.
For me this would mean accepting all the crime against me as acceptable as well as accepting a lower intelligence than before the hardcore gang stalking campaigns as well as a different career path, an a different social and economic level opposed to what was desired or possible before.

This is surrender to the enemy plain and simple and in a way its the same thing as accepting an occupation by an enemy that has insisted it has already conquered the land.

That is only so if you let it be so.

AS LONG AS THEY HAVE TO USE COVERT MEANS TO GET OVERT RESULTS, AS LONG AS THEY INSIST ON STAYING HIDDEN, THEN YOU TOO CAN KEEP THEIR EFFECTS ON YOU HIDDEN AND BLACKED OUT. In other words use the same lack of understanding out there against the perps as they are trying to use on you.
They are so arrogant that they want a TI's overt responses and acknowledgment of what they aer doing as effective and real YET THEY EXECUTE THESE ACTIVITIES THROUGH CLANDESTINE OPERATIONS AND ACTIVITIES.

Use this arrogance. It is THIER vulnerability. Look around you...how many people truly know what is happening to you. Alot but not most people. The perps want you to think everyone is in on this or that everyone knows your business or that you are targeted.

If that were the case then they WOULDN'T HAVE TO BE SO SNEAKY (duh).

So hide in the same framework they do but use this to ignore them, disregard them, disengage them, abuse them, confuse them, etc.

Think of the public spaces they use as an ocean. Think of the people as schools of fish that are disengaged from what is going on.
You are being hunted by a certain kind of animal, and YOU are a certain kind of animal. All else is background.

The perps have confusion themselves in proper perception. I had an incident where one turned to an older one and asked if I could really 'see' them. Anyone with an eye for investigation can see or street smarts. Unless this also was bs.
They seem very mind controlled and the way that they speak, look and often engage with one another tells me that they are themselves involved in something very cult like which seems to resemble a dysfunctional family set up.

Play with this as often as you can and read up on cult mind control.

The public, unless they are of use to you as diversion or cover, have no part in what goes on until the day these activities are readily acknowledged by authorities publicly.

The perps will have you believe that THEY own the hearts and minds of the public. Well, only a very dis informed public could it be.
Remember that.

Psychiatry: The trauma model

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trauma_model_of_mental_disorders

This is a very valuable resource just for targets alone.

"Absolute end of humiliation to control the child. The helping parent tries to assist the child in reaching its own goals rather than socializing him or her into adult goals."

This sounds alot like what the goal of organized stalking is to be.

"According to some critics, the goal of modern psychiatric treatment is not to understand how parents could have contributed to the problem or how it can be resolved by improving the relationship. The objective is how to reduce the burden of a psychotic crisis for the family through medication of the disturbed individual. As two trauma researchers have put it, "the ideology of biological reductionism" in psychiatry is "to exonerate the family."

There is alot in here for targets, especially if you have family that is trying this on you, or a corrupt doc.

Nero Linguistic Programming- how relates to organized stalking/harassment

Neuro linguistic programming.
I had heard about it and knew it was a danger coming from anyone trying to mess with a TI in the forums or on the conference calls.

http://www.whale.to/b/nlp_q.html

I now fully see how NLP is used on targets during the gang stalking activities. Study this subject to
1) know what the enemy is doing and relate to anything you recognize within your gs program as a TI and
2) to take from NLP anything you may be able to utilize to counter the enemies activities.

Youtube redesign

Firstly I appreciate YouTube existing in the first place.
And without it alot of activism over the years for various subject matter would not have been heard, as goes for the internet in general.

http://www.mediapost.com/publications/?fa=Articles.showArticle&art_aid=104290

The redesign will not change anything for TI's becuz thier will always be people searching for our specialized content. And when we finally chase the predators off our land so to speak-the detractors and others who try to dis credit us and make us look just crazy, really our content is political or activist related.

It would be great to have a special section for that. The only problem is that it would give the perps an area to just go to and start messing with content.

But if they start charging for use to replace ad revenue this is a disaster for TI's. Already targets and activists get censored or have shut downs of our work, but considering Youtube is pretty free speech friendly compared to some other nations or other periods on history.

Most targets wont or cant put thier names on something directly especially when it comes to billing. The second you have an address or bank account attached your telling the system 'HERE I AM..COME MESS WITH ME!'.

I can understand them NOT wanting to give anymore free time to a squirrel doing whatever or other nonsense. But it would be nice if content like this were somehow free or exempt or cheaper.

What they should have done is charge people who can afford for luxuries or charge a really cheap rate all along. If it goes totally corporate then its going to get expensive.

This may be the saddest way to start censoring the internet. Just go corporate and anyone who cant afford to be heard..simply wont be.

Why must things in this country always go from one extreme to the other. I hate it. Why cant there be a system that works from the beginning?

I would be willing to pay..if it were in cash.

Prison Industrial Complex

http://www.greencommons.org/node/770

"The prison/industrial complex is a multi-billion dollar industry complete with lobbyists, trade shows, and conventions. It profits from an evil in the US that neither democrats nor republicans will seek to remedy."

A crypto satanist in the FBI? I utilize this part of the writing to illustrate

http://www.whale.to/b/dowbenko1.html#%C2%A0CRYPTO-SATANIST%20IN%20THE%20FBI?

There is a such thing as ritual abuse yet the belief systems need not be strictly 'satanic'.

However, degrading such claims to 'obsessive compulsive disorder' is a joke and everyone knows it. Deprogramming from high level sophisticated programming is not as simple as "Did I leave the kettle on?" over and over or having to wash your hands a zillion times a day.

A perp in an NA meeting, one of 'the crowd' that was mentioned to me by a defector (a perp who drops you hints and could be working for some group who wants you alive or thinks the perp group is ridiculous) tried to intimate that me becoming interested in Tarot cards and all superstition for that matter, was OCD. Now we see why the Tarot and the following assesemnt of OCD was so focused on. Becuz somewhere they must have been trying to put a cork on my deprogramming. From there across the USA as I travelled there was a campaign of trying to suggest various diagnoses or reasons for the gang stalking. From this OCD beginning to other suggestions like the FBI following me to schizophrenia to depression to bi polar. Everything was sneakily suggested and always during heavy gang stalking (suggestions during trauma).

I had skimmed over Tarot years ago and I had this abuser in my life and took it on again with some new coping habits (daily doses of celeb mags) just to 'ignore' what was happening to my life.

I always wondered why there was such a focus on this and now I know why.
It is part of brainwashing. Since the attacks I have given up my hobbies of astrology and other things really out of being brainwashed into it. These were things I used to keep my mind busy and would have been replaced by school anyway as they were simply hobbies and also one grows.

Supporting religious freedom, as you see, is a tactic of the perps involved in trying to discredit survivors. (satanic panic). You have to focus on either the perps as cult members perhaps utilizing various imagery or focus on programming if that is an issue for the survivor.

This is why it's important what I said in the last post.
See how it is used?
What he is saying is true and would have not seemed like anything until he says all claims of ritual abuse are OCD..now I see the red flag.

In terms of logic look at what he is doing. He is fully validating and even protecting someone one belief but then denying another person's belief...which is why it is useful for the a-holes to claim all RA claims are an attack on all Satanists. Dont fall for it.
They are depending on you getting freaked out by something dark murky and unknown so YOU STOP USING CRITICAL THINKING.

There are groups who deal with helping survivors of RA who dont make any claims to specifics of the perps belief systems or they have various groups dealing with different kinds of cults who utilize different imagery.
There are religions you have heard of involved and then there is programming that is so ancient and symbolic that it may be called whatever but its all from the ancient mystery schools of Egypt.

All in all we are dealing with PSYCHOLOGY and classical conditioning. This is what should be focused on. Rarely is something like OCD going to produce stalkers who have superior intel about your whole life and psy ops campaigns.

I am sure there are a good number of people who are crypto satanists but it depends on what 'satanism' means to you.
What this article should be saying is 'Is this prick brainwashed into protecting perpetrators?' or in general 'Who or what business is this person protecting?'

If you are torturing people, doing outrageous human experimentation, totally disregarding human rights, and abusing law enforcement and intel collection systems in order to help destroy someone that is crime..who cares about belief? And also, what the jerk above is doing is protecting info that is valuable to an intelligence dept or military opposed to a belief system.

It's interesting to think that if you proved the existence of ritual used with symbolism in a belief system to program someone, like a religion,
that then you used that person for operations pertaining to govt or intelligence
then is it a conflict of church and state?

I think that is what annoys most people about these issues. The perps want so much power. Ritual abuse is one thing. THEN to utilize the person for use,
then to 'retire' them from service with no more than some suicide programming. Then
if they dont die, torture them into forgetting or suicide.

Who exactly do you think you are.

US Sec of Navy admits they oversee mind control research

http://omega.twoday.net/stories/3069883/

"Highly intelligent people, and highly telepathic people, were early found to be easier to mind-control (in the 1940s this would have included Jews and gypsies, for example). These days, with electromagnetic and pharmaceutical tools, almost anybody can be susceptible."

This would have included people of certain bloodlines as well.

Diabolus est in formo

I want to say a few things about religious antics in the media and in relation to organized stalking.
This is what is going on in the media over the last few years:
I saw this and thought I would bust laughing..
http://jezebel.com/gossip/maghag/french-vogue-devil-worship-is-the-new-black-302809.php
I actually have one of these on my own..of some celebrity flashing this sign just as psuedo descretely in a poster in the front of a makeup store in Burlington mall, MA. I need to get it out of where I stored it one day soon. But someone else has gotten a more interesting one:
http://freedomarizona.wordpress.com/2009/02/14/michelle-obama-flashes-satanic-hand-gesture-on-vogue-cover/

And certain bands for kids these days seem to be overtly 'satanic' in nature and thats probably seen as harmless as we have become so jaded:

(Your average adult fan here).. www.nardwuar.com/gallery/albums/nardpics/slipknot.sized.jpg
I have seen Mr. Marines/ all American John Cena flash the devil sign as he lifts his baseball cap on wrestling.
I have seen this gesture on a show about sharks on 'Good Morning America' where the diver flashed the sign of the horns. A few other spots on tv as well. It is always done very quickly, marginally subliminal, in the same spirit of gang signing.

Why would Satansim be 'IN' in this sort of grossly commercial way?

Firstly, becuz Bush and co. drove everyone so insane over the last few years with the Christian right, the country is disgusted. Christianity has become a parody. Especially the pushy types on Daystar channel and such ...whom alot of seem to be pushing being wealthy over spiritual values. I also encountered some talk from preacher types that was telling viewers about phenomena that sounded like the results of electronic mind control technology documented by all TI's...and trying to infer it was God.

Also, this is a way to be bad ass in a safe way and it's not based in gangsta culture which I am sure alot of parents and people are sick of, if not leery of.

This is marketed as safe.
However, it's dangerous as I have illustrated in my post with the very cynical and humorous video titled "Slipknot sucks". What I am trying to show is that the sounds they make are more enslaving of humans and only focuses on primitive monkey like noises or goes the other way into pop music and never goes deeper.
Its creepy in a corporate way not a satanic way..well, it is one mindset of certain satanists to want to enslave/fool mankind but why would you want to be unwise and play into thier hands?

The other problem with this trend is that it doesnt take into account other forms of occult and how, if you don't really understand what you are doing or can't handle this realm, you are going to get lost on the paths and potentially really hurt. Also, if you are not experienced you may miss out on the fact that to be truly in charge of your own affairs, you have the right to utilize good and evil or negative and positive as this is what the world is made of.
Why is there an insistence on limiting one's options? Why so..reactionary? Why aren't they marketing Hermetics for instance, which would give one all powerful choice between the positive and negative? Or why is there no distinction between occult practices not all being the same?

Unless you are naturally drawn to the occult and investigate such things by something natural in you, then you are once again taking a cue from the enslavers, the mind controllers and the brain washers. Its yer choice however (hmm, or is it?).

I have known many people in my life from many faiths. Alot of them are hypocrites and full of sh*t.
The Wiccan scene in RI may as well have been Satanists..at least they would have been honest. They used to whine about persecution from Christians and then turn around and hate on them.. in a country where church and state are seperated, religious freedom protected and most Christians dont even care about other people's beliefs unless they are extremists. One priestess even tried to mess with me once becuz I was worried about a Wiccan gay friend during his wedding. She hit me with something and I did not appreciate it. I am sure she was hurting years later...for I always kept her in mind.

My friend would call me and say things like "Should I project for a new computer?" give me a break. At least admit you are selfish and greedy and not a white lighter like you are hiding behind. He was innocent about it though, his greed.

We used to have arguments of belief becuz I wanted proof, math and logic and he wanted to dance under the moon and play with herbs without a medical degree. Years later he saw the value in critical thinking and I perhaps became more tolerant of just believing something.

The Satanists I have known have been rebelling Christians or recovering Catholics. A few of them I could get along with as I saw thier beliefs as thier business but there seemed to also exist this scene-a group mentality and they were doing things like internalizing s&m and they thought they were geniuses at mind games.
I used to watch in amusment at the attempts to be smarter than me and my bimbo front alter always hid my intelligence but I saw. I considered alot of them metaphysical jerk offs,just scenesters, especially the little use me-abuse-me groupies. You can do what you like with your own self dear, but dont mess with me and mines. Like I said this was a certain Boston scene I had experience with. There stupidity may have been more to do with the fact they were all wannabe trust fund kids from the suburbs where as I grew up in the ghetto, on a farm and in the restaraunt my mother worked in.
There are varied kinds of satanists anyway. But one must always watch out for a cult mentality--and weakness in the individual without the group behind them.

This is a very interesting and complex problem for targets and for the country. What we are seeing most likely is a backlash against right wing Christianity during Bush and the New age/white lighter culture of the 1990's.
Still you have to be strong. You must resist ANY one at ANY TIME suggesting or coercing you into any religous affiliation and that includes Christianity.
Dont let it be social control. Let it be your own Will.

The thing about being a TI is that I have experienced something very suspect about religion being presented in the gang stalking games. Why is it so important to get me, for instance, to become a Christian and at other times, try to get me to choose Satanic beliefs?
I notice in both instances my free Will is the thing I am NOT allowed to have AND THIS IS WHAT YOU NEED TO PAY ATTENTION TO.
Why is that such a threat or even not allowed? Why am I being worn down and coerced into choosing between only two religions? And both are somewhat distastful to me for different reasons as well as due to my programming neither one is possible as an affiliation.

This is why you see my taking stuff from You tube and articles or posting music for energy and note how I dont care if its a Christian or Satanic affiliation? BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO FOCUS ON THE TACTICS OF MIND CONTROL ALWAYS more so than labels.
I have done this purposely throughout just to mix it up, so the labels lost importance.

Think about it. What does the gang stalking system use against a TI? Labels.
What does it try to do to the TI the most? Stereotype them and get them shelved with a label. This makes use of belief systems and belief stops all critical thought.
I have experienced being harassed and messed with by people claiming to be Christians. I have also had bullsh*t, lame Satanic imagery and the horns sign used on me, which as you can see from my posts I simply find amusing.
Becuz all this is diversion. You are still dealing directly with tactics and strategies.
You have to stick to the idea that these are war games or covert war not anything else. It doesnt matter about the other guy's religoius affiliation becuz if THAT is what you could use to clearly define the enemy, then they wouldnt keep presenting you with all sorts of different and opposing religious affiliations to screw you up. Get it?

What is important is that any special interest group has an edge due to infiltration and outside connections.
It doesnt matter who is behind the trickery, its how it is done. THAT is what you need to be free of what they are pulling.
And first and foremost if you are being held from your own free will then THIS is a major problem. Not what the perp may or may not believe in.
I listen to some pretty extreme music to keep going and after all that has happened to me, its only natural and its my right to utilize energy to survive.

Stop falling for the labels game. The last time people who claim to be helping fell into the labels game there was a Satanic panic and the perps took full advantage and created the false memory syndrome association or whatever it is. Like they have the right to make such judgements..why did they think they had a right to create such an organization? Becuz it was partially a backlash to people going after religious affiliation like a witch hunt.(The people you are going after are pedophiles and programmers. Human experimentation is done and its unethical. Slaves are kept via mind control. Dangerous and powerful people are on ego trips.)
The marketing of Satanism in this way might be to get the public to numb out or turn cold towards lawlessness in our society. All I know is that MY free Will was undermined and the law says it shouldnt have been. Thus the reasons church and state are seperated.
I dont care how much satanic imagery is used or how much it freaks you out. Religious freedom protects that in this country. I have seen this mentality time and again by perps. THEY KNOW THIER RIGHTS..get a clue. Look at what that nightmare Mary did to me at the Rescue Mission of El Paso. She KNEW that I could not sue. She also knew how to get away with what she did. THIS IS THE PEDOPHILE AND ABUSER MENTALITY. You need to learn how to go after them in an effective way. And they usually have lawyers who will twist things around to thier advantage anyway.

From the kind of Satanism it looks like they are marketing it appears to be trendy and also very group minded. It does not serve as intellectualism nor does it strenghten the individual. It seems to be more sheep herding.
Maybe people are scared and now they have been so burned through post 9/11 and everything that happened that they will jsut fall into this sort of thing.
Humans are 'satanic' enough all on thier own, we needn't worry about popularizing religion. For years I have pointed out how most people go to church on Sunday, go through the motions and then act like satanists the rest of the week anyway.
Trends are jokes anyway and everyone knows it. Once it dies down the public will go on to something else.
Its people who are truly motivated by other things that you have to worry about, and again its thier nature and thier actions that matter more than what medium they are using to express themselves.
Its the energy and tactics and strategies behind organized stalking that you have to watch out for. Human energy directed with intent is what is power, not the system that is used to this end.
And when you start fearing people due to them being Satanists then they have you psychologically to begin with.
The real problem is a sense of priveledge that they themselves might get from belonging to such an organization. They might think that they can do as they please in totally disregarding peoples human rights becuz they can network this way. THAT is the problem.
And if you have a connection to human experimentation or military or anything where disclosure is going to be..er, cause embarassment and possibly monetary damage or they whip out the national security excuse then they are going to be protected and that is it.
Dont let them psych you out I dont care how vile it appears. It is what they are doing to other people and the laws they break or the protection they gain..not how they express themselves. You cant afford to take the bait anyway on this.
Perhaps something did occur in 2003 as I have read. Some sort of change. What are you going to do about it and also how is this different from any other dark age. The last one was brought in by people parading as Catholics.
Its always the same bastards who want to enslave the earth and its people. Powerful people who have to enslave and steal from others to survive.
http://www.illuminati-news.com/physical-and-psychological-torture.htm
Its the mechanics of what are done that you have to watch out for. And it seems that mind control and organized stalking have been going on long before any of this came out.

My ex associates who helped to ruin my life and destroy me are of all different faiths. My family are Catholics but I am not one of them, there was a whole faction of rich Jews and the others were wealthy Protestants, one of which thought is was very amusing to go to church on Sunday. Why? Becuz they are first and foremost criminals..career criminals. They victimize people, that is how they function. They do not function like non criminals. They see people who are not like them as weak.

Now the embed works due to someone being present

So I am doing it manually and then I ask someone and I try to show him its not copying the whold thing but only the first line that shows in the box.

It copies the whole thing, when I couldnt get it to copy anything this whole time other than the first line.

I tell him it wasnt working and he says that " sometimes all you need is for someone to be looking over your shoulder for these things to work." and that its happened to him too.

Great, more mystery.

Totally illogical and annoying.

Well, I do believe I have experienced another perp trick. If I knew the way the system should have worked I would have known I was being screwed with.

I have discovered the secret as to why the whole world has gone insane

Its simple.

The video I am posting - the embed code, which is something that you simply copy off Youtube to get what you want to happen. You want to see your video embeded.

But the code only copies partially and I want this copy of this vid from this persons site due to the superior sound quality.

So I started doing the embeding manually which means switching between screens and copying piece by piece as I do not have limited computer skills (other than having a natural affinity for systems (well duh) and figuring stuff out alot by winging it or trial/error.)

As I did this it almost felt like the pressure in my head was relieved...I was memorizing codes again. Text. or phone numbers even.

It felt good.
I now have lost alot of my ability to think and remember due to the mold exposure and the harassment(stress). I would have been able to photograph that info at one time and regurgitate it through recall.

As I did however it occured to me something else. That the reason that we are all so frustrated is becuz we dont understand the tech we deal with. It is something we are forced to deal with, yet our true understanding of it is limited. We deal in codes, like gods, that are the very math of the thing it creates, yet all we are doing is copying it and putting it from one place to another.

This video exists due to this code that is like its DNA. Like a greedy child I want only to copy it for my own purposes..to get what I want out of it. And all I know is in my ignorance, that I 'copy' the numbers and letters that make it 'exist'.

I dont truly understand it or what it is made up of. I felt a calm come over me as I became familiar with its contents..its 'code'. I understood what made up the video and became less frustrated with the mystery of these numbers and letters.

We as humans have been forced to deal with a system that we do not fully understand that is not something we can retire from at any point easily.
The tv and radio were different. They worked on thier own once you figured out a few buttons and knobs.
You are forced to deal with a whole system, have to view how it works readily, and then have to deal with glitches in that system, then to depend on computer people to figure it out for you.

We have been dragged into the geeks world even if computers are not something we enjoy dealing with. And seeing codes that make things exist is sometimes akin to seeing the organs inside a human being as you look at them with x-ray vision. Its disturbing and its too much information.

So, humans are made to bow to a belief system which stops critical thinking. That belief system IS technology. And economy.. and anything else we dont understand how it works but are forced to deal with it daily.

The transition to totally using tech was probably too fast for the average person. And it was not voluntary.
You are pretty screwed if you dont get with tech nowadays.

I never would have become interested in computers unless I had to due to being targeted. And if I did, me being the way I am, I would have wanted to learn it from the ground up, being able to master the entire system or craft as to be able to build my own.

THIS is a good part of what is making humans insane and the world screwed right now.

Some people are ready to be little gods..those people are special and talented. Artists, computer programmers, great managers of people...etc. And everyone has something that they master which makes them 'great'.
Why is it then, that we are forced into the geeks world where only they have dominion?

I had sympatico for geeks and still they have been most helpful when asked. They naturally understand my urge or the necessity of getting around a system. I only have to mention I dont want to deal with the normal set up that is sold to most people and they immediately start talking on the level of 'how do we get around this'?

But I have seen so much interference with tech and it has to be by people who are computer people.

We are forced into a system we hardly understand and taught how to get what we want (good little monkey-learn how to get the banana) but dont really understand how it all works.

I think we are all in denial as to what, exactly in such a short amount of time this has done to humanity and the world we live in together.

I am told by a commenter to this blog that I am a p*ssy and not as tough as I think..nor enlightened of course. He then provides me with advice.

"Here's a useful link. If you were less conservative, less of a 'pussy' if you like, as you americans say, you'd have less trouble with it, or posting anything of course, rather than falling over backwards at the first sign you might be losing any credibility or respectibilty, (what with you and like minds being the true revolutionaries what with your real grasp of 'reality'n' all, feeling important having to plan idiot cloak and dagger strategies as likely to enmesh you in further and deeper fear and trepidation over potential retaliation for 'taking them on directly.'
And potentially harmful advice can seem all the more plausable when it's wrapped up in a mix of genuine concern and 'truth'.) Still, I can understand that. Nor as you as tough as you make out, but that goes for all of us of course.
And if you're so revolutionary and 'enlightened' or open-minded in your way, you'd be less reticent about other ideas and ways of lookng at the problem, let alone posting any.

You are pretty funny though, ascerbically witty; no question. Oh I do see the joke/s. I've not quite lost my sense of humour yet.
Even if I am often confused with someone else and you seem to be no exception.

http://en.wikisource.org/wiki/A_Course_in_Miracles/Text/Chapter_4#III._The_Ego_and_False_Autonomy
Publish Reject
(RKH238) 11:04 AM"

Of course I ignored the link.
I am as tough as I can be in the situation. And I wouldn't have to be tough if I was allowed to have a normal life like everyone else. Go to Gitmo and tell those torture victims who turned out to be innocent that they are not as tough as they think they are as they do what ever they can in a desperate attempt to fight for their lives and their sanity.
This is one of the best yet at trying to destroy morale and I want to thank this prick for providing my readers with a good class room example of what is more artful than a tactic. This, my friends might not be a perp even. This is someone going for the throat..almost like its personal. This one is not getting his rocks off or getting paid. This one is being competitive and is a jealous bitch.

Study this very carefully and try to steel yourself against such an attempt.

You have to let this sort of thing sink to the bottom like a stone.

Stop and think logically.
What is the intent of the writer? To hurt, end of story and that's all you need to know. And he is baiting me with competitiveness due to the fact its easy to tell by my tastes in music and my style I am naturally competitive to a point.

I was put into this situation and everyone knows its completely unfair from the beginning. People were obviously threatened and had to choose between losing everything or gaining something...most people will not sacrifice for what is right or what they claim to believe. I was suicide programmed anyway, so it matters little to me what comes next in this life. All I know is I am fighting.
I go according to what I feel must be done.

I have never been allowed to make my own empire by my own hand. I am kept and forced to react ONLY. This is not my doing nor my choice.

I make choices only by the limited selections I am given. They are not however fair nor is the situation. And what is happening to me is a product of pure corruption. The laws of my country claim my life should not be in such a condition.
I have experienced a definite message sent from the very people who enforce laws in our country, that they are part of the corruption.

This leaves me very little choice but to fight in an outside area. Cyber activism and self defense out in public space is really my only options.

I had other defenses but whoever is behind this insists on not showing themselves and sending unknowns to do the harassing..so I have no targets to focus on. And so I forget about the people who sold me out as a focus.

It is brainwashing plain and simple. I am dealing with it just as one should. I am facing them directly though they choose not to show themselves.

I am being kept alive for reasons unknown to me this is not my doing. So obviously, powerful people are protecting me
1) as part of the plan which I do not understand
2) becuz they think the situation was unfair and out of my league.

One cannot be 'tough' in this situation. There is no such thing as Willful toughness in this. For me there is only programming.

Someone else is doing the keeping me alive dept.

That is not my dept.

My dept is to keep myself healthy and try to defend myself. And to produce this work.

My system knows nothing else at this point becuz all else has been destroyed.
I am nothing else.

When you attack my actions as you have you attack a machine. This is completely illogical.
I am reacting to stimuli. I don't understand your complaint. Its as if in forming your conclusions you have not taken in all the facts nor the circumstances of the situation.
This attack registers as personal. You do not know me. This does not make sense other than you are a security threat. However, I am not able to see who you are nor am I going to view you in person. I will not have a personal contact with you so therefore I cannot size up the sender of this and extract from him his motives for such an attack.

He is playing in the dark, hiding behind a cloak of anonymity of the world we call the Internet. Ironic then is it not, he uses me not facing people as a weapon in an attempt to wound.
He shows himself not, he also has not given himself up to battle with me in person at close range thus his assessment of my battle ability cannot be sound.

As far as battle goes, he is a shadow player, playing in the dark.
He deserves no further concern as his moves are illogical and he is not directly in the game. He is non existent and assessed as not a threat.

So there you see how you have to just use logic. Most of the people who throw things at you are taking advantage of you being down in this situation. However, most are not hunters..they are jokers. This one however, is getting very close and wishes to be acknowledged and let into the game. He is attacking me on a level that seems almost personal. One might assume he was someone I may have met or known personally at one time. One may also assume he is close to such people as sources of information, thus his assessments- then allowing him knowledge of vulnerable areas to hit.

He is however, in the terms of war..inappropriate. He is not a fighting soldier, and he is not going according to the rules of engagement.

He could be a stalker outside the gang stalking system trying to get in on action or he may even be as dangerous as a serial killer who has become obsessed with me as a potential victim due to my being visible on the internet. I always assume there are such people present viewing my content at any time.

From my experience whoever does my 'security' will take care of such threats and I am sure whoever it is has done so already in the past. Their motives for keeping me alive are none of my affair.

However, due to the intimate nature of this comment I request the sender give me any and all info he may be in possession of about the situation. If he chooses not to do so, it is his choice. However, at this juncture he has made himself not only of interest to me but of whoever monitors my communications at any time.

Good Luck dear.

So take this as a lesson TI's. That is why I posted it. In the end they are all hiding behind anonymity. The ones who you did know intimately that harmed you directly don't want to know you anymore becuz this provides them release from their offenses against you.
In a way, the shadow idiots are working to replace all else in your life. And to solidify the final insults and offenses of those who you did know who sold you out and screwed you over.

Now that wasnt so "tough" was it? (wink).