I have been dealing wiht abuse like that not only for years being targeted but all my life. Its the only way to keep trauma based mind controlled victims managed, and it ensures that when suicide programming becomes activsated there is nothing but a lifetime of hurt,pain, neglect, abuse and trauma within the person's walled off and compartmentalized core- this IS the fuel used power the act of suicide.
I get that every day almost especially here. You're going to be shocked to learn how much abuse a mind controlled or programmed person can take and look pretty, and composed. ITs all about multiple alters, disassociation and compartmentalization. The purpose of the harassment at this point is to keep me disacossiated- thus under control so that I cant quite be organized enough, confident enough or together enough to write that expose.
I compartmentalize most of hte abuse and that is why I dont often go over directly what occurs everyday. If I did I would not be able to funciton. Its compartmentalized every time unless I am in a position to counter it or fight back. With all the old wounding espeically in my old homtown, I mostly just fight mentally now, making hits like that comment at the beach roll off me. But with it happening everyday its a bit hard for it to not serve as a control over me.
Its hard to tell anymore if its just become an especially rude and shitty world out there due to Americans having to lose all thier shit (awww poor babies. Some US citizens never get to HAVE any thing of value) or if its like Jake said to me one day after years of him hearing about the way I am treated out in public (especially by busdrivers in this area, as it was for years-not so much anymore though). He stated that he could not believe the way people treated me daily out in the world...that was one of the first indications, one of the first things to ever really make me wake up and realize that normal US citizens are not targeted everyday of thier lives with ultra rude people performing psychological warfare to cause the victim to act out.
Also before getting into recovery and NA I wasnt so weak about the way the world is. Recovery takes away your fangs and claws..then after you stop the obsession/compulsion related to drug use( or re condition any programming to be a drug addict, which does exist), you naturally want to grow more, which is really wanting to deprogram more...Pinochio gets a taste of what its like to be a 'real boy' and wants to complete the process. Its only natural. But you just cant quite figure out why you are the way you are and why your family is...and you're still miserable and angry all the time. If you are targeted with gs as maintenance due to being programmed there is NO way you will see into the situation or should I say see outside of it. You've been controlled consistently with that method since infancy. Its not going to be evident until someone shows you life isnt normally like that for most US citizens as well as points out how it works and you see your own internal programming as an overseer not just living in it half asleep. If you are highly intelligent and can think in the abstract they have got you good and unfortunately, the brain damage that causes so many people to have their suicide programming activated, that eventually lowers your intelligence and takes from the very abilites that made you a vauable asset, is the conshusness level you need to see internal programming and outside forces using mind control tactics to maintain control over you.
Exposure to mycotoxins seems to regress a human being as well as make one feeble minded and much more gentle- like a lobotomy should. I was to the point in being poisoned by mold that at the end before I left all I wanted to do in that apartment was sleep all the time. It wasnt so much depression it was the mycotoxins. It really feels like entering a place that leads to death at that point. I believe that the gs system understand fully the effect of these toxins and utilizes it to the fullest on thier victims, especially if it turns out that MK Ultra methods are successful not due to LSD but to any kind of mycotoxin or specifc kinds that can be induced by seemingly random conditions indoors like water damage.
And the way the gs system is set up along with all the other things one goes through like induced brain damage via chemical warfare or getting dosed by perps with spray bottles of what is obviously a low level psychotropic. Thats always fun isnt it? It sure makes you a hell of alot more receptive to the harassment by human forces as well as remote influence. They have perfected some pretty subltle but effective drugs I'll give them that. This may be to cause Targets specifically to be more receptive to the tech used for remote influence. Perhaps a person untouched by such damage would not even notice such things.
It is obvious that TI's recieve a full 'treatment' in order to push them to a state where they start to be very receptive to the system. Its usually a system made up of three main components: psychological warfare by human forces, chemical warfare, the use of technologies and some influence from what seems like psychic human forces.
If you wonder why I seem like a whiner you have to remember that its a lobotomy this system is going for not creating strong, healthy people though they might want you to believe otherwise.