right after that post went out I got hit with one of the worst attacks of interstitial cystitis Ive been hit with in YEARS.
I once experienced these same effects brought on by a phone call to my grandmother, the last time I ever contacted her from this woman's house in MI. A woman claiming to be a TI who turned out to be a criminal who was handling me and keeping me in her house for a reduced sentence.
I told her about being hit with this condition only after contacting my grandmother in my home state, and other similar conditions only experienced while living at my grandmother's house were also then brought on by that phone call (2007?).
This woman went upstairs for a while, called someone on the phone, then came down and asked me "is that better?" and indeed what had been brought on by contacting my home phone at the family's house, had subsided since her phone call. !!!!!
So this could be coincidence but it feels an awful lot like a punishment for that last post, part of classical conditioning. As well as it takes away from the effect of me getting any feelings of victory out of publishing such a piece, which is more common than the punishments that seem like conditioning. I am never allowed to go above the lowest level of feelings that this system wants me at. Which is low self esteem unknown to most Americans and no sense of personal victory. Only constant brainwashing to become part of a collective...a collective of humanity. I am often given the ideation that is my only way to survive now, is to become 'equal' with everyone else, which in itself makes no sense and sounds like cult mind control all the way.
I am often pushed with the idea constantly that i am not that important in the big scheme of things and to accept that, and this is usually accompanied by some low level sexual stimulation along with shaming or humiliation- memories of what they've done etc.
This system is constantly behavioral conditioning. With no freedom.
Human rights my ass.
19 hours ago