ok i know i am a walking conflict

yes i realize me bitching about 'ghetto types' is in conflict as not only is this environment a part of my history but I have used the power of this experience to fight this system that thinks its just so bad ass.

however there is no longer the 'love' if you will or the sympatico there was years ago. whatever is going on out there its all out racial cold war and I cannot forgive or forget how many of the people in this population have been hurtful selfish and gloating at my demise while seemingly not taking into account i too was partially escaping the same psychological limitations that one picks up growing up in a place like that.

soo let me get this straight..you are going to help to destroy me in favor of basically rich whites like Jake Julie and so on or to help save thier asses. So its just like Africa in the beginning. When the slave ships come just hand over all your own kind who are POWs.

Thats all I can think of is just greed or going with the people considered criminals who everyone fears or worships (roll eyes).

One must wonder why it was so important or satisfactory for the black community in Boston or even a major number of blacks throughout the USA to be involved in my destruction or to think they know whats going on and say things like 'that girls a sucka' or now its Im all played out.
Not exctly the crowd of rocket scientists that one would expect to be familiar with trauma based mind control programming at a high level.

Someone needs to pay for turning me over to that f*ckin trash. They were like animals handed a piece of sophisticated equipment and they just tosssd it around carelessly like a toy.
Not becuz they knew what they were doing (snicker-like they ever wud) but becuz they could get away with it due to my being very vulnerable during deprogramming and at the same time being terrorized and gas lighted.
This is the kind of idiot you hear saying shit like 'well she sure know how to lie' or 'shes just a junkie and thas all..she aint no betta'. THey are so ignorant of the subject matter yet so focused on thier all powerful 'street life' or petty crime bs that they really cannot believe that there is something out there that they do not know about..and of course if they did they wud simply play dumb around non ghetto society becuz they are just so much smarter than everyone else.

They were however an effective force to destory me and terrorize me. They are but one of the levels of society that seems to have a big hand in my case at least. The other is the asshole I saw in Boston who was getting into his Mercedes old white rich guy who looked out of character being so emotional and pissed off that I was still walking around and alive.

Fuck you both. I didnt deserve any of this and none of this should have happened. Playing stupid is sometimes the best way to see what the other side is up to and witholding information from the enemy is imperitive until you i know what is going on.

If i am so stupid then why was I targeted so hard. Go fuck yourselves. Most of them act like they really dont understand programmed people. and who the fuck authorized mostly idiots to be dealing with someone with sophisticated programming? well if you want a machine smashed then hand it over to a mob of humans I suppose.
Some people in shelters just think its about me being spiritual and the destroyers going after someone spiritual and wrecking them. Another good cover story for those with IQs below the high end.

The secret at many levels of being targeted, and your programming will do this for you, is to let the front alter play along as the deeper files quiety collect all info and put the case together. Your programming will also let you know how and when to divulge info.

You will have to take a beating as the angry mob beats on you from the outside but of course they are beating on an alter so it may hurt your ego but you have to play along.

The system that wants to destroy you so you dont recall memories sent this trash after you so not only do you NOT deserve this, you never should have been kept down at this level to begin with.

Its the rich guy in the Mercedes we must focus on. he is akin to the wizard behind the curtain.

Hey when your in your apartment and youre deprogramming and you mention casually "hey i recognize that man" and its a splice of video from when you were under 6 or so, and its some diplomat talking...well when enough of that starts happening..when you start to realize what its about when you think you recognize people but cant figure out from where..

How do I know that matters? That moment? Becuz at a shelter in MI very early on when I was being harassed there heavily (and ignoring them of course) a woman who was African American who used to be a nurse leaked that info to me. She looked like she was old enough to have been around during civil rights in the 60's and she seemed to carry that habit of language from that era..having to communicate in secretive undetected ways.

"If you say you recognize that man your a dead woman walking"..was thrown out into conversation with other info.

Could be a psych out..becuz not only does it intimate WHY I am being destoyed it also indicates clearly that I was being watched at 335 Washington st Brighton MA. There are many moments like that where perps/i8nformants will bring up private moments in your home where you were alone.

It could just be a psych out...you were probably going to be destroyed now matter what you said.
But to make entertainment out of it and so much profit and self satisfaction for lesser people. As well as what seems like human experimen tation...they are just going to far nowadays and I wonder if they are so cruel to every survivor.

Like PI JJohn Panderos said to me " youre strong you can take it" Fuk him by the way and the poor little rich girl girlfriend.

Of course all these assjo;les think I am so discredited that they are all just SO homefree and nothing is going to touch them and its all over and in the past and they won and they are better than me and smarter and stronger and there is no payment due.

lets all survivors make sure there is a bill so high they will never be able to pay.