That story is going to be written and it WILL be the last thing I will do. It WILL be over my dead body.
However, I will not die before that. I will do everything in my power to not become unable to function in order to perform my last task. That story is the only thing that will make sense of my actions and of my life. Dont worry cuz we all know no one is going believe me, so yer all off the hook as it is now anyway. I can imagine that the talk concerning what ever happened to her? Is either some lie concerning a happy ending that Americans love to hear to cover up harsh reality or its consisting of that I became homeless due to either drugs or mental illness. The betrayers and the perps are covered on all fronts. I dont know why its so important to try to get me to off myself before writing that story. Anyone who knows about me and what happened to me is either being told a cover story or knows the horror of the truth and feels bad but refuses to act or is in on it and wants me dead due to thier part in it. There is a whole world of people out there who dont know about me, targeted individuals, gang stalking, covert activity, mind control programming or any such related subject matter.
You should see Cali. A woman described it yersterday as a place where people like to focus on 'fun' and having a good time. No one likes politics etc. Gee I guessed already. They dont like politics but they are more than capable of quoting scripture or leaning on God. Without the politics involved that is, to me, very dangerous.
I have noticed that everything is lax here. Its too warm for winter, too easygoing and far too...careless but not carefree. Its a strange combination of uptight and easygoing. I can deal with it for a few months but it gets depressing. And everyone is too conformist..I went to OB today, Ocean Beach. Everyone said it was an old hippie community. By the description of 'old' I should have realized nowadays that translates to 'gentrified'. It was ok I guess but its still all about money and those annoying expensive little compact dogs. And I did not see anything very close to anarchy there like in Berkeley CA where they live it in thier daily lives..for all thier clique bs that pissed me off, they actually readily reject the system. Everyone in OB had new gas guzzling cars. I am sorry but its just not gritty enough for me..and by 'gritty' I dont mean the scummy nuthouse that is downtown San Diego. Its like the USA purposely has done away with any environment that is gritty but sane and affordable. I heard it described once on a gen x MTV show that made fun of the gentrification that was just getting into swing then. We could make fun of it when we were in our 20's. Now its not funny anymore cuz the bastards we were trying to warn everyone about actually pulled it off and they added the horors that have come along with 9-11 and a police state. THAT I dont think we saw coming.
I notice though that everyone who was savvy left when they saw the line up of the Bush administration..I just didnt have the resources to understand that line up was the one close to Nixon and Ford when I was a kid.
This character described was a snobby girl and said to her friend "Oh I like your neighborhood..its funky without being freaky". Exactly...funky 'lite' is actually what they want now. Its all these reformed Boomers, 'never were cool' Gen X'ers and Gen Y and Millenials who have no idea what freedom is being raised in the new millenium, the military and the police state.
So OB was Obviously Bullsh*t .
I also will not live in a place that is also a popular tampon...one that no one should use as many of us have yet to figure out after 20+ years how to use them on the run due to the insertion process still being one of life's strictly female mysteries. And I dont want to know either.
Well if that did not either put a laugh into or ruin this writing on ...er what was I writing about. Oh, see I am downtown again and this place sucks but it is somehow not as depressing as going out of dowtown to the beach. And what is up with Old Town..its like stopping in the Twighlight Zone to catch a connector.
I know that much of old town is haunted but CA doesnt seem to handle haunted very well. I think its to do with the fault line the land is on...or something else I am not aware of. If you dont believe me about Old Town go look it up. I didnt know there were documented haunted buildings there until AFTER I had experienced it being too 'charged' for me to go through. When I found out Old Town historical center was haunted I felt better going through there. Many things in Boston are spooked as well but the land or the area holds it better..I dont know why that is. Its like there is so much structure in Boston, the way the buildings are built and the way the city is set up it makes it...it seems to make energies behave and stay within structure.
Well, I guess I am only comfortable in certain places. But when I feel that bad I do keep telling myself that the book comes before any relief I may gain from leaving the body. This system will not drive me to that before I put down just how they drive someone to this end anyway. Its worth telling and I want to be sure that as an expendable that everyone would be more comfortable seeing dead, that I leave something behind to make ecveryone jsut a bit uncomfortable permanently. Why should the destroyers win everytime they murder an expendable mind controlled slave this way?
And everyone outside of this system doesnt care about us anyway.