I want to get a few things done and then I am leaving. Off the planet.
Fuck the perps and I will NOT be controlled and behavior modified. Want to make me manageable ? Good. All yer gonna get is a dead body on yer hands which is what the system wants anyway. Fine with me.
I've got idiots coming up to me telling me I have to accept my circumstances. I refuse to live a life that is less than my potential should have been. While others less talented attractive or intelligent get all the breaks usually at my expense. Go fuck yourselves. Old mind control survivors don't last long anyway and my purpose over the last few years has been to use me for whatever you can on my way out the door. Everybody can go to hell.
Basically when you start deprogramming and having memory recall suicide programming becomes active. If you fight this-if you are informed due to the Internet, you will get such a harassment campaign and you will be framed or exposed or whatever they have to do to prevent you from going to the right therapist or hypnotist.
I was discouraged from seeking help and stonewalled all the way so the system could get rid of me like it wants to get rid of all victim witnesses.
Recently some people I used to know have been coming around the spot I stem. One woman is this annoying bitch who is in with the Brookline Bitches club who helped destroy me. They are also women old enough to know my family and ma warned me that they may enjoy destroying me becuz they hated her from Ken's Pub.
I am not my family and it would be pretty ironic for my mother to get help from HER enemies to help get rid of me.
They can both go fuck themselves and those old bitches especially.
This woman is a 12 step drone who was a former cult member (oohh more mind control, that's what I want in MY life right now). She speaks to you and does this fucked up thing with her eyes where they roll in her head.. i always wanted to see her eyes pinned becuz at least she'd be doing something normal-like taking drugs instead of this sci-fi shit where peoples minds are fried by drugs and god knows what else. She came up to me and was with some fat chick.
Now NA has proven helpful to get off drugs-the ONLY thing that works but as for getting deprogrammed, well yes, its a start actually.
But the people, u get disillusioned with them. You realize they change thier habits but they dont change their insides. Thier heads. Alot of them are walking the walk but they are hiding out alot of fucked up behaviors.
Alot of NA was really snooty to me and I could never figure out why until my sponsor finally got it through my head that these are mostly the wayward trust fund children of the elite or wealthy anyway and alot simply pose like they are poor or bohemian.
I could never figure out why they were poor- but never angry or worried. (its a saying in advertising " angry, worried and poor" it describes the demographic well.)
So much bad came out of that program that has to do with my gang stalking and the targeting of another man I witnessed who hung himself in jail I want nothing to do with them.
She asked what I was up to and I said I was homeless she cood "oh no" and " do you want my number" and i just avoided this nut like the plague. Then the this scalper shows up for a sports event who is also in that crowd and I have not seen these people for ages..I sight of her and turned on my heel out of there.
Today I was getting breakfast money near Allston far from Kenmore and Miss MC shows up again and walks by with some guy and she points me out to him and says something to him- I am sure along the line of my situation..but it was the sort of thing where you point out someone you used to know who has gone insane and lives on the streets now....under supposed mysterious circumstances.
I'll tell u one thing. These people need to work on their acting
My ex has gained alot of favor with some powerful a-holes in program and I was told in the midwest that he 'helped someone' if he has been hooked up like that.
Well duh, no shit.
The network cant bust me from the outside in so they are trying to bring in people from my past to bust me up from the inside out. The effect of my current situation being experienced by me and introducing old characters has the effect of showing me how failed I am. How they won. How the system works if you work with it and perp people. And of courses ultimately brings back memories of how my life once was.
They are just more toys for the system to play with..more characters to play roles. More chess pieces.
Thank god the system is compartmentalized and these idiots have NO idea what happened in the midwest, so they think I am losing it instead of just coasting for a while.
Take advantage of the fact that the system seems to be compartmentalized. It gives the target a level of control thru central control of information. Really the perps use this to thier advantage alot. Only the TI really knows all that has happened to them and no one can say any different unless they were there the whole time.
So the system fills in the blank spots with more disinfo to the different networks.
Who can say except me why I am such a mess after coming from the mid west? Or travelling the country. Were YOU there? NO. Did you meet and talk with the people I did ? NO you did not.
With my situation they are trying to still work on the original effort by the network here especially from my compromised family "she's crazy"...well darlings. Lets not forget who is programmed and more capable than you idiots who win by sheer numbers and 'tonnage' (nowadays 'tech'). I have a few professionals who know damn well and will attest to the fact that I am traumatized. That's all that was ever wrong with me to begin with.
(Trauma Based Mind Control-duuh) ...
These jerks will do anything to protect the many rich connected brats who benefited from my downfall and don't want me rising from the ashes to take what was rightfully mine.
What they DO seem to want is to control the manner in which I am resurrected...remember alot of ritual abuse is connected to the gs system and the tech they are using. There is alot of occult activity in this.
I am being pushed non stop lately to get a job in the helping profession and specifically a hospital. Once again its all about me taking care of others and no development of my own power.
I MUST be pushed into these circumstances so that the system, especially those who are guilty on paper (the negligent real estate company etc) are absolved.
Remember a perp told me I MUST be made manageable. Now they need to get rid of thier guilt I guess. From the beginning its been "she'll be ok" and its becuz they know they have the means thru gang stalking and technology, drugs and psy ops, thought reform and behavior modification to make it look like a victim of severe abuse and neglect is 'ok'.
They scare you into being 'ok' with fear and intimidation, isolation and invalidation. You are MADE to accept the false reality that everything is 'ok'.
Think about it. At this point what other choice do I have? My movements are restricted I am living in sheer poverty under duress and threat everyday and I am being threatened and terrorized DAILY.
Why WOULDN'T anyone take the deal they are offered instead of suffer on like this?
Becuz I did not fight so that they could mold me into what they feel is either best for me or safest for them.
I will not be controlled.
They think its all about programming that if they destroy enough of your mind and personality and give you enough brain damage -dumb you down make you weak and needy, get rid of all that internal structure and internal commands that you can be remolded.
But only a service position is allowed. U will still essentially be a slave then..a servant. Never allowed your own power or empire built on your own energy talents and efforts.
This is another reason I beleive they had to trigger my suicide programming...becuz then they could disable the very mechanism that is the core of me acting without fear of death.
I recall a perp in AZ telling me I was "only allowed to grow very conditionally" and behavior modification is specifically why.
When the system brings in old perps that hurt you originally they are trying to mess with you. Avoid these people at all costs..or at least use the bastards for anything you could get out of them without danger to yourself.
They deserve it.