Please be advised that this written work is theory. It's theorizing, pondering and amateur research. I have no actual belief in these theories as fact . If so I would've taken legal action by now. Until that occurs this blog can only be considered theorizing.
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This is an educational blog for awareness as well as sometimes a telling of candid personal experiences to demonstrate theories as they might be experienced by a person who theoretically is existing under such conditions.
Being a reasonable person of sound mind if I had concerns for my safety or others I would take responsible action for self care as my established medical history can demonstrate.
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Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Lahey clinic

Why did I go to the same place that my grandmother had been going to for years, also after her complaining in recent years that the service there was not like it used to be.
Becuz I am a desperate woman with a tooth extraction needed..that's why.

This tooth has been bad for years..I am so afraid of people messing with my teeth(don't know why) that I have just blocked it out for years. Now it is infected and has been since St. Louis. I have been taking many courses of antibiotics for months now. Becuz St. Louis was SO scary with how violent they were willing to be in targeting me I decided it best to keep differing the semi knock out and pulling. So I kept getting antibiotics and just froze up about the pulling.

Also I realized my insurance was only covered in MA so I came home to get it pulled.
Long time to find dentist that does semi sedation extraction. Bad references for research from insurance (big surprise) so it took longer. Went to a few places, tried to do it without sedation
but becuz of past trauma of the harassment I just cant do it. I know I no longer have the nerves intact for that sort of procedure and at this point with the abuse I have endured it would be like a scene from movie Marathon Man.
Besides the feeling of a set of pliers on your tooth is unacceptable. Its not an experience that I want to have in the files. Great more PTSD material.
And someone told me that the dentist telling me that it would take a half hour was it isnt supposed ot take that long usually.Finally after the BU dental perp show I decided to go to Lahey.

So I go there without a companion and they say maybe they can get around the rules. Doc says no, rules say someone must be with you. So I reschedule and have to cancel becuz my friend is a bit unreliable. I leave a message the night before and ask for reschedule phone call.Call never comes the side of me that likes to avoid the subject goes comfy again and I live on another run of antibiotics. It gets bad and the infection is now up my face and further up the jaw bone even with antibiotics so I call today. They strangely answer..they made a big deal over the phone message they claim never came thru. "we'll check our phone records". Then a nurse calls me back and says that becuz of two no shows the doc wont reschedule anymore. They had taken the first appointment out of existence so my insurance doesnt get charged. At least if it had for SOME sort of service then it would show that I did come in for the appointment.
Scared and just tired of this whole gangstalking lifestyle I called and told the receptionist that they should have charged my insurance, I did show up and I need this thing pulled and...just everything. I think I even said I was workplace mobbing target and that was enough stress already and the trauma from all that on top of the fear with the tooth...It was a rather long tirade..

..what amazes me is that my mother has always been a person who is very afraid of hospitals and doctors and she seems to get coddled by everyone. They send in anesthesiologists that work with children to deal with her becuz she is such a mess with hospitals. Part of my trauma as a TI is that life long my emotional state has always been ignored in relation to the medical field. They have always been mean to me in general and made traumatic things like surgeries even more traumatic.
There were a few docs in the 90's that worked in the few independent places not related or owned by teaching hospitals. once the places got bought out, they left.

Another thing is that as a child if I was scared I was intimidated with "your scaring the other children"..I have had that happen in MI as an adult recently after a nurse kept poking me with a needle in the small veins in my ankles to get an IV in. My arms are fine. It was eerie to me how similar the sentiment was to 32 years early.
This is the way you are treated as person involved in the world of human experimentation and programming. You are purposely traumatized and it is minimized or you the victim are blamed.
Its the same thing as gang stalking. We are the slave class to them. Especially someone programmed as an expendable..the suicide programming would tend to give you a clue on that status huh? (well duh).
And they can get away with it by claiming you are paranoid and people do not want to help you becuz they need their medical people to be heroes and to tend them, just like they need their police and fire to rescue them and unions to provide service for them. This is why Whoever uses these professions to keep thier own sense of societal order and hierarchy in place. The public might know about experimentation or slavery of peoples but how can they argue with the very people that keep thier world safe and running. To them, the sacrifices are worth it.

I was hoping for the secretary to say 'gee you have really had a hard time and you sound upset' and work something out...but no. I wish for too much. Immediately it was "FIRST of all..." something about me screaming at her. I was a bit above normal but if you knew my deep booming voice--if I was screaming at you you would know it. Then she said "you did not let me get a word in.." Yeah, I am upset and I am going thru so much trauma in a short amount of time I am losing my mind. I am human after all and I can only take so much..and to be quite honest the tooth issue is so scary to me..
The real reason I am working so hard is inside, subconsciously I have this hope that I can finish what I am working on so that I can commit suicide and take the bad tooth with me. It crosses my mind would just be so much easier. Much, much easier.(medical people in eastern MA can always be counted on to treat me this way. In other states they have been kind and treat me like anyone else.)

I have to warn TI's about something with the mc tech. I was 'helped out' last nite by a fly over.
I was so miserable with my face and neck hurting from the tooth that I just kept sitting there like " I just want to go I just want to go" and giving up totally really. Then a fly over that was low came by and I dont know what happened but right after there was a blackout in the building.
At that moment it was the same as in the Radioshack during the last blackout. The infuence of what ever they use on TI's and myself in this case specifically went was lifted off me.
My perceptions concerning my tooth were felt and drawn differently now. I realized that this was serious and the infection had gone too far. I felt the pain as a warning for me to take care of this problem.
I have blogged before that during the targeting hours that things are experienced less painfully.
If they are helping you into your grave with suicide ideation and all the other shit they do then dulling pain seems to make a cocktail where in general you avoid health issues and they contribute then to your overall misery.

I lost it and hung up on was disappointing that it was all about her.After how hard I fight everyday to stay alive and let the world know, or at least the TI world what they are doing in this sick system of oppression.
When she dons a fucking S on her chest like me then she can let me f*ckin know until then..
kiss my ass bitch.
She wouldnt last 5 minutes in these battle like TI's do and these weak idiots know it.
As usual fighters do all they can to help the public be free by fighting on some battle field covert or other wise and the silly public, the cowardly civilians sit back in thier little comfort zones and act ever so self important.
Some warriors never get medals my dear..some never even get public acknowledgment. Which is what YOU need to respect anyone isnt it? You need the overlord authority figure telling you who to root for and who to dis.

HOWEVER-I must look at the source. This is a place my family members have frequented and I believe the targeting is intergenerational.
Also an older lady who I spotted right away as the nosy 'in on the targeting' type who has hovered around my family for years..she piped up a few months ago at Lahey and thought I was stupid like the rest of my mothers family -she goes "oh, I know a dentist who deals with tooth extraction" she mentions my grandmothers dentist up the street in Burlington near Lahey. I couldnt resist so I innocently replied "but that is my grandmothers dentist....I dont speak to them anymore".
The people of MA especially the old school ones who have been keeping my family in line for years with this b*llshit system actually believe I am as gullible as my mother's family...or as dumb as my fathers. I feel I keep getting judged by these standards.

Something tells me fellow TI's, that thier way of doing things is on its way out.
Why else would there be so may of us fighting now if not? Why are so many of us aware of our situations? The system we are fighting is very old. But they are getting greedy and sloppy.

Perhaps the self righteous a-holes like that idiot old woman can take some things in my families past and use them to judge us intergenerationally.
Now you realize that personal family hardships are nothing compared to the horrors of human experimentation that you are advocating by helping victimize the Target. Is programming and/or trafficking of children a fun fave of yours as well?

I beleive I understand now. We dont care about TI's becuz they come from horrible families and if anyone is expendable enough to do experimentation on its them.
No care for the value of someones talent or intel or that they could make great contributions to society.
These people are full of shit beyond belief.
What they want is a slave class of people to deem expendable so THE MONSTERS AT THE TOP WHO USE AND ABUSE HUMAN BEINGS DON'T COME AFTER THEIR CHILDREN.

This is why if you are programmed you may secretly side with the elite at times or at least have sympathy. I never hated George Bush Jr. like everyone else becuz its obvious to me thats the game him and his people are playing. He is the target so you dont really focus on who is really horror showing for real. I dont like being manipulated like I am stupid. To be quite honest the elites values...I dont know. Most people are just such cowards, and they are so stupid. If the people wont fight and claw to get the authority figure to do the right things then how can you blame them for taking advantage?
However in this instance the odds are just too damn unfair. With the mc tech and the way its been played out its out of the public's league.
Those of us who see should say something..even for an ungrateful and aggressive public.
Think of them as dogs who have been wounded so they nip at you as you want to see the wound to fix it. They simply do not know any better.
And alot of these people do NOT think outside the little box they were raised in. To them , especially here in MA trash is to be abused and used and that is your silent status in the old New England model. My ex landlady-the sociopath claimed that the crazy across the hall who could not keep off drugs or out of jail for ripping off old ladies purses simply "came from a good family but got on the drugs and couldn't stop" and was allowed to run wild in building for years and here I am trying to go to school etc and I get targeted.
If she is from a good family why is she on drugs?
People hate critical thinking..use it as much as possible.
So people from 'good families' get away with anything (it helps when you r a rat for Brighton police as well) and people from such trash get Targeted for life.
There is a slave system in place and the system blackmails and bribes people out of their freedom, their children and their lives to serve others much more powerful and corrupt than they could ever be capable of being. Yet the outward appearance is there are good families and then there are bad families....
NO- there is corruption, blackmail, drug running money laundering, human trafficking and abuse of human rights being covered up by perceptions that belong back 30 years ago. Nobody believes this nonsense except the people it serves.

Sigh...lets hope I get lucky with a oral surgeon...and DONT wake up after the procedure a vegetable or some other nightmare.

[Also I will never kill myself so do not try to have some accident happen and say well her blog says she was..dont even think about it ..i am far too vengeful to knock off just yet. Some debts are still owed dont you know.]

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