Airing NOW on PBS Boston: Martin Luther: An Idea That Changed The World

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DISCLAIMERS

Please be advised that this written work of mine is only THEORY. It's theorizing, pondering and amateur research. I have no belief in anything posted here because if I did I would have had legal action taken by now-until that occurs this blog can only be considered theorizing.

For years I've had here a disclaimer that says I'm often sleep deprived when posting due to my lifestyle as a houseless Traveler (and my age as well as health issues). This should be taken into consideration when viewing my posts and vids on the connected YouTube channel.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

mind control through technology, validating Target's experiences

All you need to know is that the factions that make such technologies have an mode of operating where they only admit partially what they are working on or they admit only to progress that is years behind the level of progress they are at on classified levels. I read this somewhere and it makes sense. For security reasons to avoid competition such as foreign nations or other corporations or labs etc it would work to be able to focus on the work.
If you add that into the info that you are given like the articles on feeds like WIRED on this blog etc pertaining to the progress that is being admitted to it would then at least show cause...one could assume then that TI's stories are plausible. 
Especially the more sinister idea that due to the break in truth of information, in this chasm they are conducting human experimentation.

It definetly shows that these factions are going in the direction of what TI's claim is already possible.

I did not want to believe in the tech either. Partially out of denial of my situation and also due to the fact that I did not understand how this part of the targeting worked. After living it and doing research over the years..well its like where is the best place to learn a language? To live it everyday among the people who speak it.  Live it.  So the text book material made more sense as I had first hand experience.

As the years go on it will come out hopefully and laws will be made...again hopefully.  This is what heroes do. This is the job of the freedom fighter. Its not noble, its not godly, its not rebellious.   It is simply standing up to someone or something that insists on taking too much that you feel is yours. Let the rest of the world think what they please.
We are not dealing with land disputes here or shared resources. Like man usually has wars over.

This is about the corruption of the mind  body and spirit you were born with...that under any circumstances should be yours. Even if you lay dying on the battlefield in ancient times or tomorrow, your mind and experience should be your own. Every man has a right to die alone..to make good with himself as he passes.
As every man has a right to live under his own Will and in ownership of his own inner worlds even if outside an oppressor asks of him his body or his other possessions.

Have we come to a time when it is such a threat that a person sit with his own thoughts or musings? Perhaps that is only TI's due to what those ideas may consist of or what that information may be.

These activities have become absolutely ridiculous and have gone over the the level of a bunch of teenagers playing with toys.  Especially when one of those toys is a woman it seems. 

I have also heard that the USA is embarrassed  by TI accounts if they are credible. Good. Not my style and it was never by intention but at this point if it works..however there are many factions that will go along with what they are doing as there is so much money involved it is obscene. They may look down upon thier allies in this but I doubt if it will stop it. 

I cannot say if we, as TI's, are treated more humanely in the USA than other parts of the 'western' world/first world countries.  I have no data that is verifiable. 
We are treated better than overtly abused political prisoners and others in third world countries..but then it becomes all relative.
If I were simply targeted this way with this standard of living in China, it may not be so bad. However, it is a bit difficult owning one pair of jeans and shoes with holes in them sleeping on floors at 38 years old, watching beauty fade and potential disappear in a culture where one knows one could have not only had a good standard of living like their countrymen, but also made a difference for those that did not. 

And in such a technologically advanced country it is absurd to not even entertain the theories that such experimentation could be occurring. 

'Hit' outside major city in the New Mexico desert/ frightening attempts at conformity via remote influence tech

What the hell is going on?  I experienced this attempt at total obliteration of the Self and any independent thought while coming back from a short day trip, Albuquerque to Santa Fe and back again. Up to Santa Fe was OK but coming back on the train was the experience I am going to write about.  It was a major beat down session and of course there was low level sexual stimulation all day, and that makes a person suggestible. Albuquerque has the best system I have encountered (for the perps) becuz it is very subtle, with just the right balance of harassment and stalking combined with handlers to get you to let your guard down. Not overbearing outwardly with Christian sentiment like TX for instance. The sexual stimulation is more tolerated by me here due to the fact it is non intrusive...another words I keep mistaking it for just my own body acting normally becuz there aren't commands or suggestions directly connected to the stimulation- the sexual stimulation is not harassing to me in my perception so I dont notice it.  Whoever is doing this here in NM knows alot more about the nature of women or a woman like me than other places I have been. In other locations the sexual stimulation is so obviously part of the brainwashing and sexist beat down becuz its abusive. I block it or use counter measures.  Its pure enslavement but here its just like someone is having sex with you sometimes so, well duh, I am not going to be offended.  It is strange however.

But there is constant attempt to wear me down gently to get me to settle down or conform or calm down or not be vengeful..but its almost like someone knows a woman of my nature cannot be ordered around or the perp will get it worse. Fair enough. 
I have experienced very dangerous levels of targeting with what seems like tech outside city limits twice now. On the way  into Albuquerque, right past the  illegal alien checkpoint, on the bus from El Paso TX I got hit so hard that I had to take a counter measure that would have only been effective against electro magnetics. I wont tell you what it was but it stopped it. If I had not taken this measure, it would have been worse.  I felt like my body was in pain all over, that I was going crazy, I could feel being 'hit'.  Its like nothing you ever want to experience and I have never felt it like that before. You actually shake.   This was out in the open desert.

Now, on my way out of Santa Fe on Memorial Day, on the train I thought it would be OK as it seemed OK on my way in.  After alot of mental activity (at this point I can describe it as a state that resembles almost the false or forced dream states that TIs experience, except awake. The subject(TI) is not so lucid that's all.)  Then as we got into the desert it went full force into this state where I was slowly wiped of my Will, my self and my own mind or identity, by way of force. VERY forceful ideations eventually almost resulting in forced speech. Fortunately, I can curb that often for some reason.

It began by me going from these sad thoughts of 'is this all worth it? and do the public care about this research?'..that no one seems to be paying attention and the fact people dont care that DO seem to know what is happening to me made me wonder "what am I doing this for?" Perhaps humanity just needs to be left to the dogs. They dont seem to mind or care anything about this at all..
I kept questioning my motives and this work..just wondering if going on is worth it-which is strange indeed considering I am basically programmed to do this at this time in my life as a reaction to what is being done to me and the world. True it will end in a ritual suicide after the book, but that is due to what I have been put through, not my choice..its a matter of not wanting to live this way for life. In a way they have turned me into a suicide bomber and the Truth is the bomb- the book. THEY chose to do this..I just wanted to become a councilor and an artist.

Anyway,  it went from that more lucid state to some sexual stimulation, then this blankness came over my mind. I think I was upset and weakened anyway, I started to get the idea that I should become like everyone else...that I should  dress plain and reserved ( all the people on the train were dressed like that), then it was about my music..no more metal or anything with energy to it..I had to start listening to what everyone else listens to..conform. Whatever the industry put out that was new and pleasant..(non threatening and non sensual or charged with energy).  Then it was again, about getting with a husband but now I would only be having sex it HE initiated it, and I actually had a vision of me with my knees touching..like the old saying "keep an aspirin between your knees".  
And I felt this during this ordeal that my own mind was non existent, that I was being erased in a way. Then the final ideation along this line was that I would accept Jesus as my savior and all this stuff about Christianity. In my head I was actually forced, finally through TORTURE to say that I will accept Jesus as my savior and go to church.  I almost actually mouthed it but like I said I can resist alot of attempts at forced speech..in order to get someone to speak forced speech you would have to take them pretty far through a torture session like this and that would be like the end result. Over and over again Jesus as savior.

ALL THIS WAS DONE BY HUMILIATION, SEXUAL STIMULATION (ABUSE IN THIS CASE), EMOTIONAL DESPAIR AND SADNESS/WEAKNESS-VULNERABILITY AND DEGRADATION.  


Afterward I was more affected than I ever had been from harassment of any kind.  It was all I could do to record what had happened, and go off to a hospital. They got me good this time.


Not very Christian is it?  In my next post I will write my theories on  this system and why it defies our normal perceptions of religious or spiritual beliefs etc.

IT WAS MORE AKIN TO MIND CONTROL AND TOTAL BRAINWASHING than any experience with any deity, Judeo-Christian or other wise. This is not something Christians would approve of..not true ones. This is something that a cult would approve of or a Christian right wing military or some other faction who wishes to dominate human beings hiding behind Christianity. Utilizing the religion as a front for Christianity-as-conformity.  The death of the Spirit. Of the Artist. Of the Self. And of any Love one has for humanity, nature, or self. Any connection with anything outside oneself.

THIS IS WHY I STAY AWAY FROM LABELS AND PAY NO ATTENTION TO RELIGIOUS CONTENT.  I have posted vids from bands who are obviously metal bands wearing Satanic Tshirts and I have hard rock and metal on my Youtube account. I have also used content from Christians and have some on my Youtube account as well. Why? becuz you cant trust religion right now as an indicator of a group you can trust.  And I find it very strange that part of my harassment consists of HAVING to choose either Satanism or Christianity..but my free Will to continue to study other avenues is the thing that is crushed I notice.  BECUZ ITS NOT ABOUT RELIGION OR BELIEF ITS ABOUT CRUSHING THE WILL OF HUMANS.   I would NEVER let anyone get me so down from torture that I would bow to any decision made for me by some other faction..its totally bizarre. I cared little for either of these belief systems before this nonsense in 2003. I studied each not too deeply at certain points in my reading over the years.

Its like whoever is doing this is terrified of Hermetics, Zoroastrianism and Eastern religions.

This was probably one of the worst experiences to date. The spirit and the personality was totally void. You have never experienced anything like this in your life...total replacement by an outside intruding system that is fake. Like all there would be left is this shell.

The reason I am not afraid of disclosing something like this is that I just dont care anymore. No one is going to help targets anyway..what do I have to loose?  Also no one is going to stop pedophiles or criminals. No one cares just like my mother told me.  Good so it doesn't matter what I say.
Its better than being harassed and controlled all the time.

The other day at the Rescue Mission where we wait for rides to this other shelter, this kid said loudly at the other end of the sidewalk " They want to keep her on the run by harassing her..at least thats what they say".  The big 'THEY' again. Annoying.  That in itself is tactical and makes me think he is in on it opposed to some observer. Why else would he say that to me knowing I can hear him?

Beleive me I would give up if it were not for how obnoxious betrayal and sell out was..as well as disrespectfully sloppy.  That is why its so important to make the target overwhelmed with people knowing and not caring if they are victims..like its ok. Minimize the abuse. As well as people continuing to abuse them and not stopping. Make the abuse seem normal. Like this is life.
Then the person will just forget eventually through being traumatized. 
Then from there I cant imagine the horrors that await the TI that has given up fighting. A life not lived and potential wasted and destroyed are more painful than losing a fight while consciously holding ones sword. Surrendering and dealing with occupation..now that is embarrassing as well as life long pain. Better to be cut down where you stand and die on you own land.

Becuz one day this will all come out as human experimentation and totally feasible officially..it will of course be too late for Targets now. But that is always the way it happens, each and every horror in human history like this is always pulled off this way. The thing I dont understand is why humanity never learns and keeps allowing it to occur.

Like I said, is this work worth it?  Maybe the public should be left to suffer. They certainly have left me to suffer and die.  So what is the purpose of this work other than my obsession with people knowing the truth?  Disclosure is great revenge only to a point. Its true they leave someone like me little choice.

I could let go my grip and just fall back and become everything they say I am in the slander campaigns (thus their campaign's purpose to cover for the effects of their extreme humiliation and torture) or I could just go quiet and conform-submit. Stop trying to live me life according to my own Will but how much humiliation can one person handle in a life time? That is wayy too much. To give up for a life time...for the rest of your life you are stuck with giving in. That is the decision you made..to stop fighting.

I am sure old and feeble persons like my mother have no trouble with this  as the mind goes, the personality is destroyed and potential long robbed of the person. Then the base human animal will to have the body survive intact takes over and one decides to keep living on earth in this body due to pure instinct-long after the spirit is obliterated.  Lets hope that there is more power in me than that foolishness.

A short life as an instigator, a rebel or a fighter is much better in comparison to a long life as a fool.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

CIA on college campus /History of project CHOAS

http://www.cia-on-campus.org/

Covert Action Information Bulletin, Winter 1989, pp. 25-28
Students, Scholars, and Spies: The CIA on Campus by Robert Witanek
http://www.cia-on-campus.org/witanek.html 

http://articles.latimes.com/2000/may/08/news/cl-27707
 
http://www.baltimoresun.com/news/nation/bal-te.cia29mar29,0,4306924.story

Domestic Surveillance: The History of Operation CHAOS from Covert Action Information Bulletin, Summer 1990   http://www.serendipity.li/cia/lyon.html
Verne Lyon is a former CIA undercover operative
who is now a director of the Des Moines Hispanic Ministry.

THE most hysterical comment/TI advice I have ever read

its easy enough to stop. 3 simple steps. buy ... its easy enough to stop.


3 simple steps.

buy a real nice car. not a ford or hyundai. an old jag, or audi, or something.

make sure it is mint. take pictures.

leave it in your driveway.

when shit starts happrning to it, call the cops. every time. every single time.



explain to them each and every single time what caused you to be solicited in the first place.



if your guilty of what your beign stalked for, then just roll over and die. you deserve it.




if your not, do this

Publish Reject
 
 
uhhhhhh...ok. 
 
By the way all my detractors and enemies think I am on my way out anway and are just waiting for time, in addition to what has been done to me, take its toll.  You must live in thier reality.

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Barret House Women's shelter New Mexico..is it harassment or just stupidity?

The one thing I can say about this place I was recently staying is that as far as shelters go it was run right. As far as cleanliness and everything about it was very much what a women's shelter should be..now they just need to invent one where a small fee is paid and the guests can pay in every night or week.  Anyway, its a 3 week stay. Barret house in Albuquerque.

I had this roommate and she is a little Asian out of jail for 6 years for assault. She is not typical jail material however but she is a brat. I dont really mind this as brattiness is a bit charming in my eyes..but when she decided that she had to talk to her boyfriend at 11PM every night it kept me up so that I was waking up at 1AM then 3 or 4AM..then her alarm on her phone would go off at 5:45 AM and she would never get up just lie there like me until 7:15 or so..(this place was cool about wake up as long as you were out by 9AM.. the way it should be). 
My anxiety levels were just too high in this place and I don't know why.

I asked her for quiet and she said her boyfriend gets out of work at that time. There were three women and me in the room. There was an older woman there saying she was targeted by the police for 6  years living in her car..hmm. We discussed the harassment and I offered her my blog and she wasn't interested. Also she seemed like a real drama queen about being targeted.  I just took it with a grain of salt like I do everything else now. She certainly was obsessed with the age difference....that I was ONLY 38 and that this was easier for me than her. Maybe true but there is no comparing in this game. There were alot of self absorbed women there.

Then there was sky an older woman claims to do the homeless circuit around the southwest. She is OK just an old hippie...still she had a story about being exposed to meth and it becoming a problem wherever she would settle again. She claimed it would come out of her body and get into the new place she was living wherever that was. She expected me to accept this without documentation or scientific fact and I said nothing, but then acted weird when I mentioned the harassment..she also said that the other woman's claims to being a TI " yeah thats her trip"..this is what makes one wonder if half of the people one meets are operatives or not..so many similar claims but yet..so much lack of proof or even a  coherent story. I often wonder if some of them are just TI's in denial about the mechanics of this system. At least the targeted lady admited that there is human experimentation going on and that the ACLU knows about it and wont do anything.  She did not seem to understand cyberactivism is really the only way right now and wanted to do the worst thing (especially older female) TI's can do which is to cause a scene in front of the FBI offices. That is so old school and counter productive its ridiculous.
Now do you understand why being a GENUINE hardcore target is hard?  Becuz you can never tell how many drama queens, opportunists, or jsut perps are posing as fellow TI's.

I didnt asked the other target about the cell phone at night and she warned me that this woman had just gotten out of prison for assault, beating up some woman, she spent 6 years in jail for it..(hmm thats a long time for just assault. Strange...must mean she had priors.) Then she claims this woman has a bad temper and starts mentioning her childhood trauma..it was all minimization of anyone else's situation becuz they buddy around during the day.

So to after asking her to stop and realizing she wouldnt, I just called the woman in charge, who seemed really good at her job and even gave a speech about admiring homeless women's strength once.

I asked to have my room moved but wouldnt rat on the girl with the phone.
I simply said that they were noisy.

She said she would move me to a room with a woman by herself.
I said ok and she said 7a.

I get back and I am in 5a instead. The woman gets back who is in 5a and she has a baby in there with her, shes on methadone and she grinds her teeth loudly and has for 30 years all day and night long.

The woman who is in charge at night, the lady with the wig, says that is the room that was left for me. I go into the room and try it out and as the woman is talking to me the kid takes a head first off the bed after rolling over off the bed. The woman actually cares for her child so she is upset and I cant deal.
She then freaks and says "Dont put this off on me and my son" and I try to tell her its the wrong room and that she and her son need privacy. She sticks to this and follows me to the office making it about HER and not about me.

This selfish bs was what caused this problem to begin with. I have anxiety attacks in some places it gets triggered and this was one of those places.

This was the stupidest place they could have put me..with a woman who has young child AND she grinds her teeth constantly?? That is more noisy..besides if it was discussed with me instead of them being sneaky and changing the room on me before I got back they would have known a dope fiend on any kind of opiate is not a good idea right now. I work very hard to not relapse so I may gain revenge and fight my enemies.

The amount of pressure I am under is often not overtly appreciated but covertly taken advantage of.

I cant say this was organized stalking becuz I was never overtly harassed in this place..but the women around me set a tone to make me feel very corralled. Like not following the rules and being disrespectful about getting sleep..and this is also an example of another problem within the homeless population- there are so many people like me who have no family, no money in the bank, a fixed small income or none at all, and no support system. We go it alone often out of necessity..then there are the jail people who use shelters as a place to go after getting out, the people women who keep having babies even though they cant afford them ( the system loves them, they are never a threat and dependent on the system for support and will exist for thier kids not anything else. One woman told me "we arent brave, we are irresponsible-we dont have our kids with us if you notice." She is right..I dont have any so I figured that they were braver than me having them. Alot of these women still had cars, clothes and storage with stuff in it. And there is always that snobbery toward someone like me, that they are not truly 'homeless' yet. This is what is wrong with nicer womens shelters..it turns into a f*ckin tea party or a hen house. Its not a place female warriors and freedom fighters can exist easily. And this is also where alot of recovery people were staying, like drunks who keep coming back to this place cuz they cant stay clean. Fair enough, I may be coming back but not due addiction.)

I just lost it..the pressure I am under daily for years has been incredible. I have become...a woman tripped over my feet on the train Boston one day, and she got huffy. I didnt even move..I didnt flinch. I have become that. A perp one day described my situation as 'a marathon that never ends'. True.)

So I just left and it was all about her and her son and everyone was totally selfish and the bad wig lady did nothing to conflict resolve.

When I went back the next day someone had taken my jeans (great back down to one pair) and the wig lady had this attitude like the dope fiend was going to be unsafe around the area...give it up. I didnt leave with anything more than almost crying and saying how its all about everyone else all the time never considerate of me..which is totally true.

Another example of a facility that covers its ass by blaming the victim of their screw ups.

Letterman and O'Reilly




So why did Targets situations get worse in 2003 and then when Obama came in the gang stalking got less overt and active? Why have every ring of corrupt cops decided to help clean house on behalf of organized crime utilizing what is obviously the Patriot act?

Its the stuff that is never admitted to that never gets dealt with and solved.

Saturday, May 23, 2009

The big 'THEY'

Years ago a suspect family member was making fun of another close family member.  He was talking about conspiracy fantasies (conspiracy theories, which are represented as fantasies by the general public, some rightly so and others show merit) and he commented by blaming " The big 'They'"..that this is what all these sorts of paranoid kooks are claiming, that there is a big 'they'. 

I was always to demanding of myself and others to provide facts and some sort of sanity to thier leads so I never used 'they' becuz really it does sound paraniod and why would one have to resort to a vague, generalizing comment like 'they' if one could identify the parities involved or was attempting to?

As the stalking and harassment became 24/7 and there was the federal investigation around a friend of a friend people around me starting using this term. I was targeted and suffering from mycotoxicosis and there were other things being done to me to help string me along and mind control me really.  So I was so confused and damaged that I jsut went through this and as everyone around me talked of 'They' I just went along with the info I didnt ask questions the way I do now. This is the power of organized stalking...its mind control (brainwashing) and serves to almost trance the person into complicity. If you know the way the trick is done you no longer fall for it or into a trance. I dont mean literally a heavy trance but a state of complicty..this has to do with other things about my situation anyway.

My psychiatrist of many years who simply was trying to treat anxiety and depression (now I know the real reasons why anyway) with sedatives, and did little with me as far as psychology, though in crisis she would talk to me longer.. after hearing about the fed investigation and surveillance a psych at a hospital tried to mess with me by asking my psych " are you sure she isnt psychotic?" and my dr. assured her I wasnt.  But as we went along she said to me "THEY need to know someone is advocating for you". 

My own mother said when I returned from my first road trip "THEY are afraid of you" (with a creepy amount of pride involved). Then my grandmother said "..and there is no guarentee THEY will stop following you" and then told me not to go into Brookline and Cambridge becuz then it would just be "a war back and forth".

Then there was the last boyfriend who told me 'they' were keeping me down and to let 'them' know I simply wont be intimidated.

A girl in a hospital told me "THEY are mad at you becuz you're not accepting your situation"..(giving in to being intimidated).  And she was a perp believe me, there was a whole little group in there.

Then there was a hotel clerk who was reluctantantly involved who warned me that 'they' are trying to gather information.

One day, I would love to know who the big THEY is..what gets me about this is that everyone around me seemed to know who 'they' were, I mean everyone must have known to keep referring back to this term. Why is it no one tells the victim what is transpiring? As well as most of these people either perped me for reward in the end or turned on me..for whatever thier reasons.

How does this word sound as an identifier of the situation:  UNACCEPTABLE. 

The afore mentioned shananigans (I dont want to hear it -I like this old fashioned Boston Irish word and I am going to keep using it..so there) is part of getting the Target away from his or her own identity. Isolation as well. It starts this way and this way and ends up with the person being a TI or another object or label..just as 'THEY' this or 'THEY' that. How can someone be so stupid? Becuz they make sure they use people you trust on the first levels to gaslight you this way to ensure that you fall into the hands of the perps later on....also this may be a pre cursor to trying to label you. 

In fact this is ALL gang stalking by definition. Everyone is treating you like a dumbed down child and no one is being helpful, and EVERYONE AROUND YOU HAS SUPERIOR INTEL THEY ARE UTILIZING while keeping you in the dark..the question should be how can everyone around you be so stupid not the target.  There are only a few reasons why people would do this to someone.

They feel they are ultimately better than you or worth more than you.
They feel they arent doing anything wrong and youll be fine..(usually such people are in denial)
They want money or power or position way more than they give a shit about you living dying or suffering
They have much to hide and to answer for...

gaslighting: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gaslighting

The NOW clock (what do we think of THIS?)

And what the hell do you TI's think of  this? I wont explain to onlookers...lets see what other TI's have to say.
The NOW clock: http://www.youtube.com/ 
re activate it and it'll then keep going to different examples.

or go to another site to link to it:
http://www.marketingvox.com/human-clock-plugs-now-network-on-youtube-044039/

Click on the link that says its available as a widget..then arrive at the site.(you have to put the cursor on the clock...your cursor or mousepointer guides you around the sight.)

Friday, May 22, 2009

Why labels are not only stupid but help oppressors control and repress

Firstly lets tackle a term I ignore as much of American culture which is ever disposable anyway as well as ridiculous.
MILF /Cougar : http://www.flahute.com/2009/05/16/cougars-v-milfs/

Being delusional as you all know I am for using critical thinking in daily life to figure out problems and avoid life crushing attempted frame ups, I was under the impression that I was a person opposed to a term..especially one that is sooo male centric and fully serves thier purposes as well as demeaning to women over 30 everywhere.

I often have trouble with reality, like the idea I had human rights as an individual or that the Geneva Convention was going to be obeyed..things like that really should have sent me to the nut house years ago-but I keep on insisting on my version of reality, which is mere fantasy to most Americans and considered bad manners really-freedom fighting is something that people do in other countries, not here, and it was something that stoned people did in the 60's..or Gen X did in the 90's, and we are supposed to have learned our lesson and our place by now post Bush.  Some people never learn I guess.
Perhaps Homer Simpson was a wiser man for sticking the crayon back up his nose...maybe I should try it sometime. I might enjoy life more and be capable of the ever popular 'getting along' with people....hmm.

This term infers that I am of a certain age so there fore I am..uh, something else then, opposed to what I was before-- ???.   And as usual instead of a person I am now a sex object to be judged only in those terms but of a differing value than I was when younger. Which is the perfect con if you want to corner and control older women who are still attractive but are now loosing their estrogen and with it thier patients with your BS. Also now they are still young enough to have impact but older enough to use it wisely.  Hmm truly a dangerous animal. "Well, Bob, get out the net and lets corner this thing. We don't want this animal bothering the local populace and eating small children...so get out that labeling system and with the use of words we will contain this thing and kill any concept of female power by restraining this critter within the sexual roles she thought she could grow out of at this age.  If that happens we'll be ruined man!"
Its like Wild Kingdom..remember? The old guy would sell you insurance while in the background his younger partner would wrestle some dangerous creature.. or that Australian guy who passed away. Imagine what a MILF would do for the ratings if he antagonized one of THOSE!!

Just when you thought it was safe to be human and grow up, American men find some obnoxious way of making you 16 and controllable again.

Labels trap people. Stereo types at least merit discussion as there are details attached. A label is so..clinical.  I feel like a jar with a brain in it at the local hospital or university.
And MILF just sounds gross for some reason.  The word itself just has an unattractive way about it. And with all the research I do until I am ready to drop concerning human experimentation etc, it starts to look like some NASA label or some weapon. 'The MILF ray- the latest in non lethal weaponry.' I cant stand it. Get rid of this, its awful.
And Cougar is just immature...and even a little too weird.  It just takes away from female mystique and that is so depressing really.  Perhaps this is men's way but its just weird sometimes the way they look at things. They undoubtedly think this is funny as they always do.
Why do men not have funny names like these? Should we make some up?

This is an easy demonstration of how labels work to corner and corral. In organized stalking campaigns the bad PR campaign will always utilize labels. And the attempts to really fulfill a label are never ending.

The purpose is to:
-reduce the TI to a one dimensional character so that they are easier to further manipulate on all sides and so the public has little sympathy for them.
-get the TI into a 'label' that further make them manageable through public perception such as the ability to shelve them or further humiliate them.
Such as being represented as masculine then they will try to push one into being a lesbian by different methods when in fact this is not a natural state for you. This is becuz this society has a problem with gay people and so this is a desired result of the perps.  As is anything they can get you into that you were not into before to use against you that looks 'bad' to the society you live in.
Shelving you with a label is the ultimate.  Getting you into something where the specific label will 'take care of the problem' (you the TI) as far as public perception.

Let the ONLY things they have to work with be the truth and that belongs to you.

Remember this is all related to behavior modification. FOR THEM TO GET A TI TO BECOME OR DO SOMETHING THAT THEY WOULD NOT HAVE BEFORE OR IS NOT IN THIER TRUE NATURE seems to be a desired result for them.  Labels help this system control it's victims.
And we all know the label that is tried on all of us in the beginning..they will even try to get you to take on a psych label of your own free will via trauma then suggestion, which of course means its brainwashing and there is probably nothing wrong with you at all.

The next time you have a health ailment like needing your appendix out, observe how, in the world of sanity and reality the doc will tell you directly you have this health condition.  People won't go skulking around you when you are traumatized from being terrorized 'suggesting' in so many ways that perhaps you need your appendix out, especially by mirroring you with your own symptoms and then saying that is what is wrong with  THEM.

Ahh, psychological warfare.  A very bad disease indeed.

Labels are alright when trying to create Order, however when trying to create disorder one will hide under the order of things in order to do so. Create false chaos to create false order. (True chaos would be that tree outside yer window and its design, which man did not create and is naturally very pleasant for all healthy humans to view.)
Perps and the system only care about the order of things that benefits them and thier plans and needs.  They do not respect the natural design of things. Labels help them cut and alter so that things will be or grow as they desire not as is according to Nature..which means that its a falsehood. Or one can look at it as the war of the Artists or Designers where this system tries to convince us that it knows best and our own Will or mind does not. That we do not have the right to design our own realities for our lives, or that we cannot think for ourselves.

Labels are useful even necessary to create order. Under all circumstances they should be inspected to ensure they are not being misused to trap someone into a role or perception to control them.  This is the value of info wars...manipulating  information is useful to make labels seem realistic.

Oh and to add to this I just found out MILF is for moms..ok then.

Thursday, May 21, 2009

Class wars hidden under racial harmony

If you focus on race then class will be no problem.  If you promote diversity then class wars can be ignored.
http://theeprovocateur.blogspot.com/2009/03/united-states-coming-soon-class-war.html

No one will realize there are casualties. In fact people will be trampling over the other guy (hopefully of thier own race) to get to be more like the class that is being favored in the silent class war being waged and they wont even notice. While harmony is being promoted simultaneously class war is as well.

Especially useful is to attach a certain race to a certain class...making as if certain classes are represented by certain races only. Then one gets brainwashed into thinking that being in racial harmony as it is promoted is then class harmony as well.

You know what I miss? The world in the 1990s and before when people let you take care of your own affairs and minded thier own business.
During a Republican president there was more govt interference in citizens lives than anyone is ever going to admit. And not just by the 'state' but by the accompanying Christian right, which was totally insane and I still cant believe what I saw.

THAT was a class war if I ever saw one.

The ability to use critical thinking and come to ones own conclusions is not only unfashionable its almost illegal if not extinct. 
The wrong way of doing things is being promoted as the New way of doing things...there is nothing old fashioned about reason, logic or critical thinking.  It is and always has been a constant.

And still there is injustice in the world and we act as if everything is going to be fine and everything is fixed. We have made changes and headway...great. 

THERE WILL ALWAYS BE INJUSTICE IN THE WORLD.  You have no right to manage victims, make it better for them by denying injustice exists or happened to them.  You have no right to medicate people out of processing thier truama or the INJUSTICES that occured in thier lives. This is victim witness intimidation.
You have no right to whine that victims advocating for thier rights or truth are ruining your good time or that they should just give up. Is that part of 'change'? 

This reminds me of the WWII generation and how they came home and wanted nothing but to 'forget'..which of course led to all kinds of messed up behaviors and practices that led to the 1960's.

You can be happy for changes that occur that are positive but never stop seeing reality for what it is as well as seeing injustices that still occur as valid.
And you will not fool some of us by gentrifying every neighborhood, hiding under banners of racial harmony and having PC be the new strict social etiquette. Reality exists outside the dome..or do you even recall what that is about? Or worse yet, have you even been outside the false environment you exist in?   If the answer is no then you are ignorant of what goes there...then you need not judge as you lack information.

DEW 2009 conference..and an included conversation I had with a BU professor on the subject of scientists making toys that can be abused by the boys


http://www.iqpc.com/ShowEvent.aspx?id=151250&langtype=1033

I was panhandling and doing activism in Kenmore last summer. Late an interesting man came and sat next to me.. In this college area alot of people let thier hair down at night at the bars and restaurants. In typical Boston style they want to talk to the more coherent street people becuz they are bored or interested in why you are or how you are existing this way.    Yes, you will also get harassed but meeting the friendly sorts is worth it.
A man who was Dutch I believe sat down as he was drunk he wanted to talk. He worked at BU as a teacher I believe and did other work.  When we started discussing my activism he turned to sadness through the conversation..reality set in I think. He turned away from the reality of his own life connected to what is happening today in this world- the misuse of technologies. He tried to mask his emotions in typical Euro style and as they seeped through he said sheepishly "I cant help if someone mis uses something I helped invent (create?) ".   He  wanted no further  concern in  what  was going to become of what he helped bring into this world.   He then suffered from guilt I suppose and gave me like $40 for a room.

This is the problem with people with careers in these fields..like everyone else they want to keep them.  As you can see from the vid on Mind Wars the man speaking says he has a very hard time with scientists becuz anyone wanting to make laws they distrust.

It really comes down to people feeling that expendable people are worth it in business.

I was told to my face by a perp who had some sort of fondness for me that basically I was an expendable person and that .." expendable people are factored into businesses from the start. Kind of like men dying on the job of constructing a building are factored into that budget at the start of the project."

Fine...now in recent years it occurs to me that there is a difference  between some one who takes a job and knows the possible risks and is also trained to avoid those risks, and someone who is not aware at all what is happening.
He was referring I think to my personal situation(s) but its the same analogy.
What are a few people compared to that much profit? And if you argue with the military industrial complex nowadays it seems you are arguing with the military itself as well as the police.

Perhaps its like nuclear bombs. If we dont get them the other side will have them. Fine..let all the miltary have them and anyone else they feel authorized. BUT then make sure that there are laws in place that pertain to misuse and abuse of such technologies.  And stop using psychiatry to cover corruption -give it up.   How much psycological warfare and tech does someone have to be subjected to to make it obvious what is happening? Please.

And dont depend on that being a rhetorical question...this is not Dylan's generation. That would be a fun protest song...if they still made them. " How many  times does a man have to get hit with tech and gangstalked before you can call him a man?"  Forget the philosophy lesson from the bard.  

MAKE LAWS and demand that victims..ANY victims be able to have some recourse and be believed if they are targeted.  Not this cold war against the victims.

Monday, May 18, 2009

Changes in the targeting/gang stalking lately..New Mexico

What was the intrusive ideation stopped on Saturday. Just stopped.

Also I noticed that where I am staying alot seems to start at 6AM. A woman in there that I know from the homeless scene around, said to me "I think its interesting that we all just jump up at 6 AM." And I suggested mildly a few things and she responded in a way that indicated she is not a perp and not playing games.

So someone else notices that 6 AM there is something stirring.

It stopped Sat and I felt it was just eerie, Sunday was clear and its not been that way for a long time.

What has happened lately?
1) someone called the police on me when I was doing audio journals outside a convenience store I had gone into. They said I was drining. The cop was friendly even flirtatious, and was just doing his job. Becuz he wasnt a jerk, I made his job easier by giving my social instead of the MA code on the lic, the dispatch couldnt find it in the computers. He only wanted to check for warrants...actually he was going to just leave but I didnt want anymore BS while I was trying to work so I said go ahead and look me up. He was trying to see if I was drunk or nuts the whole time but that is his function.

2) I looked up INSEX.COM again on either Fri or Sat and realized that the gang stalking is jsut like what TI's get put through and I had looked it up on my phone not a public computer. I cant get it off this computer, but the address seems to be "www,insexarchives.com/updates.php" and it comes up when I typed in "INSEX.COM". What was interesting was the first lines :"He patiently tests and trains each one. Teaches them to submit, to process thier pain, to accept thier fate.." It sounds exactly what targets go through. Especially the part about accepting one's fate.Then if you click on it there is a piece about a woman named Tyler, who "..faces interrogation, electro-torture, and forced orgasms. She is prepped for her ordeal with a sack chained about her neck and her hands shackled to her side..."

There is a difference between wanting a fantasy and having someone take away your freedom in real life. A BIG LEGAL DIFFERENCE. This sounds like what TI's go thru all the time.

3)UNM closed as of SUN til JUNE 8 for interim.. I went to use the computers and there was nothing open. No students, just older guys playing hockey near the sub, some families enjoying the campus. It was so quiet in some way.
If universities and colleges are participating, then there could be something to this as far as what seems to be tech stopping.

Of course while this was going on I would get the harassment that is like people terrorizing me moreso.. freak out stuff.

Now it seems that the stalking or surveillance has started just as the other drops off. People in trucks and cars doing obvious stake outs when you are waiting somewhere and today some young gang wanna bes were right behind me and a woman talking having a conversation..one of them jsut got behind her and I felt like saying 'do you want to sit somewhere?' trust me I know when someone is spying and being obvious. And that has been the whole thing today..all day. To make it obvious I am being watched and stalked again.

Which makes sense becuz when one doesnt have control one way one must have it another. This is not paranoia..I have been through this long enough to know as well as dealt with two stalker boyfriends...which gave me learning experience, not paranoia. Someone providing protection would not need to let me know that I was being watched for my protection. This is more intimidation.

This is the reality of TI's situations and I want you to see it for what it is..





So perhaps this has changed due to someone somewhere finding where I am through the social being run thru the cops computers and stepping in OR someone is very nervous about being discovered as abusing these technologies for rich perverts.(and people who want to get rid of a person as well).

San Suu Kyi- The perfect hostage

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aung_San_Suu_Kyi#Personal_life

“It is not power that corrupts but fear. Fear of losing power corrupts those who wield it and fear of the scourge of power corrupts those who are subject to it.”

http://www.global-sisterhood-network.org/content/view/2136/59/http://preciousmetal.wordpress.com/2009/02/27/book-review-perfect-hostage/

http://preciousmetal.wordpress.com/2009/02/27/book-review-perfect-hostage/

Friday, May 15, 2009

Comments on last post

" AJH said...
It is the worst kind of torture, the obsessive ideations that can only come from remotely applied technology. None of us high harassment level TI's are relationship ready, and we forget about all that kind of thought meme because we have substantially greater issues we face; like survival, every waking minute. For the most part they haven't treated me to the relationship ideation theme, and I am glad for that. In your case I hope they get over it soon as it totally spurious to the TI condition.

5/14/09 4:16 PM...

Rachael O. said...
The thing about it AJH is that its not obsessive, if that were the case it would probably be the doing of ones own mind.
No, this is hypnosis and suggestion just like the documented technology is shown to be capable of doing. Brain mapping, the voice of god tech..its all there for anyone to look up. And this has all the trappings of a long term behavior modification process based on classical conditioning..not just obsessive compulsiveness. I do not obsess over things like this. These are ideations connected to sexual stimulation and like some of the dreams TI's get one can tell its fake and not of ones own mind. Its coersion..its not something I would obsess over at all. This has been an ongoing thing and its part of the full gang stalking program. Now that I have been terrorized and weakened the point now is to get me placed/shelved so that all the people who screwed me dont have to worry about it anymore. This all is the same as the things said to me by perps in the physical realm.." they are mad at you becuz you are not accepting your situation" or "you should live quietly now that those people are not bothering you much anymore" or some such sentiment that basically says 'the system beat you down so why dont you realize this is the way it is'.

When your own mother, after years of abuse and deception gets you in a car alone, and turns to you and says " You know when I was dealing with the syndacate, I always took the harassment to mean 'know you place bitch'" and this is after she agreed with me that it was due to the federal investigation but before she got desperate and tried to corner me again alone and ask me if perhaps I had a 'mild case of what Danny has'..ok bitch which is it? A fed investigation, organized crime or me being nuts? You have screwed yourself by changing the story around and in typical fashion you want to use strong arm tactics..which never work on me. My grandmother was the true manipulator in that family..real central control that one. Diplomatic and everything...manipulative deceptive and you wouldnt even know it. My mother us more like her father and not my grandmother is the problem and like Ed thinks she can just take what she wants from people...He never took anything from me and she isnt going to either and neither is any of the people doing this. As a perp said to me about all this: "You lie once you have to tell another lie and another.." that is what we are dealing with."

Yes, I do appreciate the people I meet occasionally that help me by telling me a bit about what is going on. So who lied and has to keep lying to cover it up? All the idiots in my life probably...
Another one I loved was from the same girl, a lesbian who I think was fond of me, she said that men had a brotherhood when something went wrong and that "when you mess with one amazon you mess with them all".

True, people could be acting out cultural fantasies by trying to destroy me..but all these people can go suck off and especially my old intimates and associates.. Becuz they all have dis informed versions of what is going on..goooooddd.

Thursday, May 14, 2009

More ideations about sex, submission to feminine ideal, marriage, becoming one man woman...until I started research again and posted this.

Whoever is doing this..they just don't give up do they? Too many idiots watch Sex.. the City, don't get it (cuz they aren't Gen X women) and then somehow have decided that part of making the country strong is to get away from this kind of female independence. That Gen X women seem lost and confused..well its our perogative and also the women in these sorts of situations are growing and finding themselves. We dont need guidance from the Christian right, or any one else like say how military men think about women. (totally sexist).

I would not doubt that there is a program of targeting women to make a strong aggressive woman or multiple women docile. That is what seems to be happening and let me tell you why it seems feasible..
I have heard from very sexist men who have slipped here and there as I have traveled and investigated, that there is a general consensus among certain men who are very into this sort of thing that women need thier "wings clipped" and that they have too much freedom. That it is the reason the American family has broken apart and the reason that there are so many men on the street without mates.. or on the street in general.

So not only are certain people being targeted for specific reasons (like me being a victim witness they want silenced) but for more broader reasons...like women are needed to keep all those men off the street etc.

I have had experiences with perps especially in the mid west who hate working girls or other warrior women. The women will actually state that its a woman's job to keep men in line and be their conscience.

This would be a gross misuse of these technologies...for moralists, reformists etc to use remote influence technologies to convince someone that they need to change who they are for whatever ideology this group subscribes to.

Why do you think I dont blame just one group? It is then very hard, always to know who is doing this. This is either sexist males like Masons or the military or the Christian right/military or something I had not thought of or simply a group who wishes to find new ways to keep people silent..it could be a number of groups. (You know I do my homework and I have a background in occult/esoteric research..when I mention Masons I do it responsibly so dont even try to call it conspiracy. They have always been male based and one of their older rules for initiation was to agree not to be present at the initiation ceremony of a fool, and old man, or a woman. Go ahead, look it up. I can post the youtube vid if you like. I feel the only reason they have recently gotten women visible is so that the mass cant come to thier doors knocking and accusing them of not including women. But these are women who are of a certain kind.)


I am in the southwest and its Christian and overly masculine...I like men, its just that they need to stay on thier side of the fence when it comes to me running my affairs...unless I need protection or ask for assistance. I am realistic about the limitations of this body's strength.
There are women you can dominate and women you cant. Any male over a certain age knows that and the ones who dont fail or get into trouble. Obviously Someone is trying to get around this pure FACT OF NATURE.
Destroy the women who have warrior in thier nature (unless they work for the system I guess). By the way I should have been a councilor and an artist by now...seems pretty civil to me. YOU and YOUR SYSTEM forced me into this position so stop m*%therf*#$cking crying about it and trying to neutralize the monster YOU created.
One thing this system needs to learn is that you cant alter the very nature of things with technology and psychological warfare.

Did you ever get over your chest hair and penis and think 'gee, maybe women like her exist for a reason..childless, at war, manless, warriorlike, aggressive, assertive. Maybe in the big scheme of things, she is necessary to some balance in Nature or on Earth and she is simply doing her job'-well DUH. But this whole system doesn't respect Nature's design (Masons shame on you..YOU should know better..if you are involved that is in any of this nonsense).It seems to want to play god completely and re design/alter everything to its own liking.

A total falsified environment.

I guess if you are looking towards the future and the whole world is technologically influenced or created like real objects replaced with holograms (a person claiming to be a Harvard professor told me that..he also made you sit and listen to him read the most boring poetry ever in a sloppy accent.).. then Nature's designs are obsolete. In your mind, its all up to you to design this new world, and anyone who sticks to Nature's design is not going to survive or be phased out.

I know this remote influence bullsh*t cuz I am a vet by now.  All it is is trauma based mind control packaged up neat so no one sees and its quick and easy.
So of course there was sexual stimulation, along with a reminding me of all the trauma I have encountered (so dont try to fight or put forth your own Will) and then the ideation that ' wouldnt life be nicer and easier if you gave in to a husband? That you are learning the sexual thrill of  (the concept of)having only one man sexually and that kind of submission is sexually exciting. That the system is taking away all those abusive memories of your former lifestyle and you are going to be a whole new person.' Fixed. (like a clean slate). That this kind of submission is the 'ultimate thrill'. So you see how its really about temptation and reward. You are altering the subjects reward system..Pavlovian I would say. Classical conditioning.

Of course all this is a culmination of:
1) lowering my intelligence and dumbing me down through brain damage via stress, chemicals, isolation from other human beings(love, care, touch, socialization, mental stimulation)
2)abuse- a constant state of fear/terror/doom
3) sexual stimulation as well as humiliation and degradation

Remember as I have posted before WITHOUT SEX AND THE USE OF THE SEX DRIVE THERE WOULD BE NO WAY THIS SYSTEM COULD PULL THIS OFF.
It is one of the things that is so primitive and so rewarding you cannot resist its influence. And Stockholm syndrome will start making all this look very attractive compared to the lack of or void in comparison.

Barbara Bush on Romney's religous beliefs (video!)

This is why I dont even entertain the sleazy mud slinging (and marked lack of critical thinking) known as "politics". Guess what? Unless you are elected to office your opinions should be meaningless. This is one of the few instances when I am in favor of the concept of women/the wife being seen and not heard.




What the hell does economics, the economy, finances, the budget and human rights/civil rights have to do with opinions about Romney and Mormonism?

Makes me wonder exactly who the real dictator is in this interview.

By the way...people on assistance tend to stay that way when they have to deal with oppression and they are driven into homelessness. Also if you dont want people staying on the dole, you might encourage their efforts at self help instead of targeting them.

THIS IS ALSO WHY CHURCH AND STATE ARE SEPARATED. HER USE OF MENTIONING MONEY AND THE POOR IN AN EFFORT TO VALIDATE A RELIGION IS A CHEAP SHOT.
I especially love the inability to complete the pitch so she has to throw it back in King's lap and refer to his wife for a finish. Becuz really she is essentially a wife of not a politician proper or an elected official..which is why, like a typical female, she thinks she can say as she pleases without accountability.

You cant have it both ways. Unless of course your just a girl, which this vid illustrates beautifully.

Some of us are kept down, and I certainly am being taken care of by my own...a human experimentee/inconvenient victim witness. The treatment I am getting will certainly 'take care' of me thats for sure.

If you dont want people on the dole then fix society: lower the population by demanding a hold on births by law, stop the medical industrial complex from valuing human life over quality of life and medicating symptoms not curing disease.
..and you might try not having things like MK Ultra and other nightmares of human experimentation.
Oh, also you might stop blaming victims, encouraging corruption and hiding behind a false morality when really YOU and your kind are the ones that ensure that poverty and its trapping stays alive and flourishes. Create a system of government that does not play tug of war with the public where one administration demonizes the poor then the next encourages their existence and even assists in thier increase..and then back round again. 

Your belief system is meaningless, though we live in a country where you have a right to express it.

Critical thinking will always rule over that of dictatorial opinion...from 'the wife' no less.

Oh, how the peasants outside the castle take your royal abuse with gratitude dear queen (roll eyes)!

You never know who might pop up who has eyes to see. There is a reason for that. Becuz the true rulers of this world know how to reign wisely where your hand is played as that of a teenager with a new credit card...I mean realm to rule.

Transference, projection, displacement..Instead of a chair, get this woman a couch.

Is this attitude that explains why all my rich criminal friends got off and even rewarded while I, a person struggling on assistance (gasp!) at the time of the massacre..I mean Romney's governorship of MA and the war, while I end up targeted out of existence?

Hmm, its not the main reason but it sure did help the bad PR campaign didn't it?

DIDN'T IT?

Like a perp said to me once about the situation "oh, well, it doesn't pay to be poor". Nice try but the radiation experiments still stand as well as that federal bust.

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

New Mexico and interesting phenomena

Ok it may not be phenomenal.
I seem very sensitive to things happening on primitive levels at times.
New Mexico bugs  me and I dont know why. The place is not as intoxicating as near Mexico, where flora and fauna make one think 'this is paradise'.  
Mostly you've got natives, a few afro americans here and there and whites. pioneer looking type whites and these gorgeous exapmles of the scandinavian blood here, some people look like they just arrived off an airplane from some nordic country. Its intersting mix of just a few ehtnic groups. And there are native/spanish mixes who consider themselves spanish never Mexican. 
As someone whos greatest natural asset is the ability to draw I enjoy looking at human beings and taking in thier features and structure as art itself. People are  beautiful and this culture shys away from fine arts in daily life so you wont know that.
What became a problem was the native population. Alright this isnt Boston or NY. In the southwest of the USA  men just do not have  a concept of the fiercly independent northeastern female. But the native men here get right up in your personal space...and it happened one too many times. Then it snowballed until yesterday after feeling hunted at the bus stop downtown by just this swarm of loser guys and even the women I left feeling like I wanted to kill every native in the area. Something in me got VERY stirred and on a primitvie level I started thinking of war-preparing for war etc.
I got to where I am staying and calmed myself. I thought there must be a logical explaination..there has to be. I just felt as if the natives were aggressive even just through thier presence and they have a very bad habit of looking me straight in the eye, like they want war, wanna fight or wanna own.

Then I talked to a few people and they said they always felt the Navajo had something 'dark' about thier nature. I looked it up and there are alot descendants of warlike tribes here, mostly Navajo.  I knew it was a logical explaination.  Now I know what their nature is I'll just get some dark glasses and ignore it. But it is very primitive.  Even if a female is looking at you from her drivers seat, it looks like she is...hunting or -I cant explain it but it doesnt scare me it triggers something in me and pisses me of on prehistoric levels that I cannot readily control. 
Explaining it with logic however is helpful. 
The natives in Pheonix never annoyed me as such nor anywhere else for that matter, and I like the non intrusiveness of  the Mexican culture. There are natives that dont look like what I assume is Navajo here and they dont bug me either, but they look different.   I am only assumnig that it has got to be their ancient warlikeness I am struggling with.

Interesting.  So much goes on among our false man made world that is of the natural world.

http://209.85.173.132/search?q=cache:R36Nf7iqHRMJ:www.emayzine.com/lectures/man.htm+navajo+warlike&cd=5&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=us

The natives are really the last people I want to hassle with becuz thier deal is the rawest in the country and also many of their activists are harassed and followed by the FBI for life due to them being a threat (by telling the truth of course.)  Uh.. I can kind of relate.

Joy Junction was ok this time. No one messed with me..due to some environmental issues they have with the building I couldnt stay there.

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

UNM..gets a thank you

UNM  gets four stars on their foreheads..they know why. Thanks.

Sunday, May 10, 2009

In all fairness to different generations of TI's

(NOTE the times of posting are due to a feature that allows one to schedule posts. Blogger in draft. I highly suggest it.. But it has no spell check yet.)

Having a tendency to be hard on millenials as I have will probably only fragment the community. I heard a song in a van I was in and it was from a young band. They seem convinced that the world is coming apart or at least the system anyway. I have to consider the fact that this generation is at a disadvantage becuz they are young and also that the brain washing tactics and system is so all inclusive now, how could they know any different? Also, they are most likely scared to death and intimidated into this sentiment.
Also, I dont think they had 60's generation parents raising them from toddler age to always question authority as it has a tendency to f*ck up and not want to admit to doing so.
This is why I have done other peices on long lost blogs about Gen x. I feel that 'slacker' ='sleeper'. We always knew, something inside alot of us, that our time to really rebel was not so much in youth, but at some later time. This is why we seemed to not do anything when younger. Something was wrong with the set up and we knew it. Something made us wait and here we are.
We are the children of the transition into technology and those of us who did not go along with the systems designs have just as valid of a voice as those who did or helped with that design thus far.

I saw this ridiculous tv movie about a millenial kid with a gen x mom. It made the mom out to be this lost, loose, marginally incestous lesbian monster. However, when I was young we had to live with Boomer worship through the 1980's even when they shipped alot of us off to tough love camps for experimental drug use-places more geared towards 40 year old long time users than scared kids. They were jealous of us being young. Now we are marginalized and ignored becuz a new generation dislikes us becuz we are wise and older.
I personally refuse to deal with the little snuggly deal between boomers and millenials. Our parents were monsters in some ways and people dont change they just get good at hiding. Thier egos are no smaller than they once were when they were being overt about it. Alot of parents of first borns like me shun Gen x'ers becuz we saw too much and had to scrape too many people off of floors from OD's or whatever. They dont want you to know what the 1970's was really like.
The point is that if anyone sees what is wrong right now its us. We grew up fast in ways the millenials will never know and and gen x has a wisdom we never get recognized for. You can be older than me and try to co op Nirvana all you want. You will never understand what our music meant to us, just as we have only a faint idea from a childs view of what Hendrix meant to you or no idea really of what Slipknot means to millenials.

Its becuz there is something about gen x that disturbs the 'grown ups' as long as we are alive. I believe its becuz we will never return to June and Ward in our old age. We werent rebelling in youth with radical ideas were raised with them.
A history professor who dropped out tried to tell me that its a fear going on of anything from the 60's.

As you can see from my activism there is a definate effort to control the minds of men, to squelch free thought with many methods.

One thing we forget about readily in our society is older people. I have to imagine as I did today that older people use youtube also. That they are also taking in the internet experience. In some ways people older than the baby boomers are more understanding of human nature and of human failings. They seem more realistic about life and the world. They also often seem more approving of a rebellion against repression. That someone is trying to do something about it and this is perhaps necessary or just and right.
Older men and women have memories too. They recall travels and lovers and experiences that were the culmination of thier lives. They still think and form ideas but rarely is there any attention to this in our society.
Just try to imagine them young like you to give this validity.
I started imagining if older persons view some of the things on youtube. That they have memories of work or women or life years ago. Thier life experience is also valid.

I think becuz I got slammed in my early 30's that I am especially driven and bitter about being kept down at an age where I am not young anymore but that I did not even have a chance to get my life in order as I liked. I tend to focus on other TI's who are struggling with having thier life in thier prime cut short.
I have to assume that much older TI's exist or that very young ones exist. However I wonder how many very young people know they are targeted.

I have had alot of action lately with people trying to get me to look at my future or how what I am doing now affects my future. The system should have thought of that when I was trying to form my future in Brighton around 2003. Now the road is set and I will not be taken off the path, not by anyone or any force. This is the power of your 30's. Staying power.
Yesterday some old NY alleged radical (really he was just an old crank hiding in NM) was trying to convince me that doing the right thing equalled isolation. Alot of people have also been trying to get me to look at what comes after my activsm or project. This is typical in trying to control a target. That means that they either 1) dont understand the whole situation and how severe it is
2) they are trying to cover the systems ass and all its corruption
3) they are living in denial and trying to get you to settle down there with them as a way to make all the abuse better. (also there is too much focus on career defining a person, on becoming someone, as opposed to getting it together inside first. I very much needed to get myself repaired internally before venturing out into the world or trying to gain position in the world. The idea that organized stalking and harassment or betrayal and torture are motivational is pure fantasy and wishful con jobbing on the part of the system that does this to people. They will always do ANYTHING necessary to validate thier actions. Do not buy into this. They screwed up end of story and it must be represented as a screw up not something beneficial to the Target. They wont show is thier faces so why should they be allowed to save face?  Allow them to save nothing from these battles and this war.)

This then means that you are doing something that you probably should be doing.
Ever since the beginning this system has ruined my life and then tried to con or control me into some sort of solution to what THEY did..or some faction tries to push you into denial to solve what another faction did to you.
Guess what? I should be at the top of my game in life right now, going up the ladder in my chosen field and working non stop. NOT LOSING YEARS OFF MY HEALTH AND INTELLECT, LIVING IN HOMELESS SHELTERS AND MISSING OUT ON LIFE EXPERIENCE. How is this OK?

This system never fails to utilize intimidation, fear, and produce failure to ensure you see no other way out other than THIER way as a way out.
The ultimate victim witness intimidation machine.

My future consists of payback and a healthy dose of truth being left behind. Other than that I have no concern for the future. What the hell is wrong with people? No one guarentees a future of a way out of a problem ever. And if the system insists on denying a future of my own design then how is accepting thier design to my advantage? It will never be as beneficial to me as my life plan was.
Unless we are indeed dealing with human experimentation concerning human performance enhancing methods as well as silent behavior modification.
Then there will be a definate effort to prove this system works, for investors most likely, if not to silence a victim for the benefit of some.

I was in a shelter in Boston and listening to Rick James, as I grew up in the 70's for a few years in an urban environment this would be a natural part of my musical tastes. Anyway, this idiot turns to me and says "Youve come a long way" it was so insulting. Like I couldnt have come up with this as simply a matter of taste.
It reminded me that the TI is always portrayed in the worst light possible to make behavior modification seem favorable if not necessary as reform.

Never do people know the TI for who they really are nor ask them their side of the story. Its just assumed that bad PR is the way it is.

Being complex and complicated only makes the systems job easier...becuz then you can be misunderstood as well as represented as one dimensional. You have seen what the media does to famous people lately? Puts them up for public scrutiny? Then the public get the idea this is thier right or this is the way. They are THAT easily trained believe it or not.

Complicated people piss this culture off. You cant readily sell such a thing as quickly as simple content. The days of admiring the sensitive arist type are not here right now. However since this is a constant throughout human history avoiding the validity of a true artistic personality is like refusing to say the sun is out simply do to the sky being cloudy. Its another bs illusion is what it is.

And we are dealing with a pc trained generation who believe this belief system to be like religion is to other generations..the rules of PC are thier societal ettiquette. Rarely do these types however have to live in circumstances where racial and class differences must be observed and analyzed in order to stay alive.

The younger people I think we are seeing who are targeted are the kids who are snapping and just going off and shooting people in schools. I bet you a good chance there was bullying involved. I alwasy lack sympathy when I see all those people at the school crying and sh*t..either they dont know the truth or they are doing whatever they can to avoid responsibility.

What would drive a young person to such an act? Not just mental illness thats for damn sure. There must be societal factors. And young people especially males only know how to go off or attack. When your older you'll know how to go to war and head a campaign not just fight.

So I should refrain from slagging off younger people so much. Perhaps some younger TI's can comment more, so that I can see as we used to say 'where you're coming from'...

cell phoney trees

http://waynesword.palomar.edu/faketree.htm

Friday, May 8, 2009

New Mex-moved on again

Needed to get away from heat...and needed better resources for writing.

I am going to stay in a shelter I previously stayed in until I can get into the nicer womens shelter.  And you know what is going to be my experience?  I am going to have no trouble at all..becuz I am telling them now right here that if there is undue drama or any targeting there will be trouble..for them that is.

So no idiots approaching me, no rumors about me having police connections (bust out laughing) or any other trouble making for me.  I predict I will be niiiiiccceee and comfy.

Also the woman who runs it just got promoted and they cleaned up the place since I left (!)...so it seems everything is in order. Lets have a nice time then shall we?  Fine.

Its hot here as well...probably move on again next month. 

a piece on handlers and attempts to get into your head..by anyone

We as targets and survivors of trauma especially tbmc have to be especially careful of attempts to control us. But anyone among human society has to watch for this. People who are preconditioned are especially vulnerable.
The response in the comments I got makes it seem like people really dont know what perps do tactically..

If so then here is some advice.

I notice that criminal types seem hip to tactics of these types more than anyone. I dont know much about other TI's except what I have to assume are genuine TI's on this blog commenting or people in the conference calls I have heard that sound genuine.

If you are a trauma survivor or tbmc especially, which is a systematic enslavement of human beings from childhood that is often intergenerational, you are going to be in danger all your life of being 'caught' in predators traps.  If your situation is that of a tbmc survivor (cult, programming etc) there may very well be people who are predators who work for the cult or...who ever is responsible. They will constantly hound you to try to see if you can be reconditioned either to keep you quiet as a victim witness or to put you back into work in various capacities.

Some non pros will come after you just becuz they know the basics about what they consider weak or vulnerable people and they know they can come after you for whatever THIER motives are.
In other words, firstly you never know who you are dealing with...you never know who people really are. And with the system targets deal with, you REALLY never know who is on the other end.

You can feel it, if you stop and think and not let emotional reactions pull you in. There are people who know just how to approach you in order to control you.
That's all you really need to know actually. Is that they are working on getting around your conscious mind.
Look at the way they are making you feel not what they are saying. Beware of repetitive comments or phrases or even intentions..this is mind control attempts or what our society childishly calls 'brain washing'. Think of someone who wants to get into a secure area or locked doors...they just keep hammering away or knocking until they get in..and its very much about codes to get in especially with tbmc survivors.

They are only trying to get in somewhere that they should not be allowed to get into..more covert warfare.

Its about trying to control you even online..why? To waste your time of course. Once you get a list of their tactics you will see that every action is to the same end and fits into the regular 'list' of things they are trying to pull.

Its yet another way of keeping you down to make sure you get nowhere, in any realm. Its to stunt your growth and to keep you small. There is something about targeted individuals..its as if there is this fear and terror almost defined as obsessive, that exists among the perps and their supporters among the general public, that certain TI's never reach thier right size or natural level of growth/evolution...spiritually, emotionally, intellectually or otherwise.

You have to be kept small. Only their reasons are thier own.

Do what you can to stop the system from keeping you from your right size according to Nature, not a falsified system of control, man made and organized.

In many ways they have cut TI's off from the rest of the world. You live in the land of the dead..you are essentially what the Asians call an 'angry ghost'.

This is part of the ever creepy occult end of gang stalking , the part no one ever talks about. Yet, these ancient rituals and practices are what makes organized stalking most dangerous if not effective.
This is part of the process of what we call 'behavior modification' these days..reforming or modifying someone by breaking them down and destroying them, then guiding them by suggestion and isolation into what the overseeing system wants them to become. You can easily loose your true sense of self this way. Also with many TI's there is brain damage from the use of chemicals, stress or other methods. This is not so different from what is done in voodoo to make zombies...if you read the book by the Harvard professor who is the subject of the movie The Serpent and the Rainbow you will see this is not just folklore. Real chemical compounds are used, like the poison of the puffer fish as well as others to make the person appear dead to medical staff, then the person is buried essentially still alive. The medically undead person then wakes up in a grave trying to get air, they suffer brain damage from lack of oxygen to the brain. Then at the right time the person is dug up by people who targeted them, and they are permanently damaged 'zombies', really all due to brain damage and chemical poising. The victim is targeted by someone coming up unexpectedly and blowing the powder in thier faces as a means of delivery for the chemical compound that makes them appear dead.

The spiritual element can be categorized as psych warfare...the act of taking a personal object and wrapping it around a vessel and intimating that you now possess the persons soul..none of which would you have had the power to do so without chemicals and damaging of the brain.

I have a background in some occult study which is the one of the reasons I am still walking around. I know that what is happening is essentially the same practice but now with tech used as well..a form of chemical and tech lobotomies to create manageable people. Look at the similarities between the voodoun methods and what is done to TI's.

You need to be aware of chemicals, occult practices, psychological warfare tactics, psy ops, and psychology.

What is being done to targets is based on ancient practices of attack and destruction of people and is useful in a modern era where mans biggest disadvantage is to believe that the ancient world no longer exists or has any validity. He believes he is expanding but really he has been corralled off into an area where he can be controlled, especially by the modern ways of info war or manipulating/managing information.

Modern tech in our daily lives the way it is set up is nothing but a prison and diversion if it serves to define human reality as a whole.

This is why so many perps feel a sense of power. In an ancient way they are feeling the occult power of these activities even if they don't know what they are doing for what it really is. Its good that they do not know what they are truly engaging in as this keeps THEM controlled. Also many perps are simply blind and mindless tools of true designers..for instance I have heard whispers and things around me at times about people discussing conversing with people in on this sort of thing.

Like a woman telling a friend that she said to someone in on this " You think I dont know what you do, that you destroy someone who is spiritual?" This societal ignorance and fear gives the perps just what they want..an overblown sense of power. They don't deserve that much mystique nor recognition. All they are doing can be measured in terms of science, math and logic..thus targets should respond as such. To become poetic or mystical about it is like believing in the voodoun instead of seeing what he is really doing. Its called mind control.

I am not spiritual..for the most part I was programmed and that is all. Spirituality is relative. Programming is logical. Let the public think this is a spiritual matter or that its a power game or that its a soap opera or epic or whatever their TV ad minds come up with.

You cant destroy logic. That is why its so important to keep an eye on what the perps are doing to your emotional state or any other part of you they are trying to manipulate.

Spirituality is like money in the bank..fortunes can be gained and lost. What they are hoping is to do so much damage to the vessel you are occupying, that you will just want to 'leave' (suicide) or that you will never be able to retain energy again post damage.

The perps want to change you, and in order to keep that going they have to constantly work on you. Harassing you everyday is a way of doing that. Anywhere they can get into to do that they will.

A handler is specific I think to people under a system of control..usually someone worth money somehow who can be profited from. Or if no longer, someone they want to then keep under control so they dont talk or free others or for whatever reason. I was warned by another older female TI that alot of guys are sent as handlers for us. She said that point blank. I already guessed that anyway...but anyone who can control you and add to the damage is beneficial to the systems intentions.

Thursday, May 7, 2009

Abusive comments on blogs

There are a few idtiots who write in here and I can tell one of them does it on purpose. The other one is questionable as to how coherent he is to begin with.

You will not take up my time and get me and other genuine targets away from activism.  Dont waste my time.

There is a moron on here who has robert in his i.d. name..and he sounds like a true paranoid. He also writes like a person who is trying to become a handler..not gonna happen.   He says the same thing constantly like I have gone afer him before or beat him down in my writing somewhere. Since he repeats this phrase over and over I can only assume its brainwashing attempts...repetition being  the very definition of brainwashing.

I have been a TI and a female survivor of mc long enough to tell when attempts are made to gain control over be via abuse or guilt or both.  Not gonna happen.

I purposely dont mess with people if there is a problem..if there was I would simply not correspond or I would do it publically on this blog so everyone can see.  EVERYONE. Yer people and mine, jerks.

Dont waste my time.  I can sense that when I dont print this persons comments that they get off on it becuz they know I read it but was offended by its contents. 

And to all genuine TI's and people who really care...its another day you made it through.

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

the phone fiasco was dealt with

She agreed to return it but acted surprised by all this, that it did not work.  And I had to spend 17 min on the phone with Virgin getting everything back to normal.

Why are there people managing stores who dont know the products and I am sleeping on a floor on a mat with only one pair of pants and 3 shirts?  Why does she get to be so stupid and get paid and I have to work on this for free everyday (dont worry I am  adding Paypal as requested by my readers who want to choose to help out. You are correct, I should accept some help if I need it. But what is obnoxious is that the American people or anyone for that matter shouldnt have to pay for the others keeping someone destitute. I should have been able to get my apartment fixed, go to school become a councillor and an artist.)

After what I have seen this country is so crooked its ridiculous. This is common business practice over here, while someone highly intelligent and competent is targeted into sleeping on a floor. 
At this point I would say we need something worse than the pig virus..something to get at all the perps who seem to be hooked into a system that always warns them of coming danger. Always gives them an edge. Something for the ultimate connected people, the spoiled brats to beat all brats.

All the people hooked into the gang stalking system always have access to superior intel.  They shouldnt. WQhat they need is to be humbled like the rest of the country right now.

Do you think the economy or the pig flu scares these people?  No. Becuz they always have that edge. That advantage..I want to see something come along--just for them. To get at them, to scare them.  To humble them.  
What is happening now wont even touch them.  They'll either laugh at it or they'll play drama queens to the people around them as a game to look like they give a sh*t to appear normal, while all the while they smugly think about how they wont be affected, and they know it.

We need a special little gift..just for our friends in the perp network and all in the know. Something...exclusive, since they enjoy that so much.

Anyway,  i got my money back but no internet on the road. waste of my time anyway.

radio shack on Mesa in El Paso lies--a phone that wasted my time

usually radio shack is pretty good but on Mesa in El Paso this woman told me that the $80 phone I wanted was now 100.. then she said that it would get youtube and blogger so i could manage my stuff on the road.

LIED.

I went into youtube and it says it doesnt support streaming media..also it wont go into blogger as it says "bad security certificate"..just like on my cheap phone.
What is the point of having a keyboard if I cant write? I only bought the thing out of necessity.

I called Virgin and they were pissed..they told me she HAS to take it back at the store becuase she outright lied, also I found out that the phone I saw advertised was 80 and still is..the lady lied and talked me into a more expensive phone.  I am appalled at Radio Shack of that quality. I depend on this company to have geeky employees (as in techy people) who know more than everyone else about products..what cuz its near the border, employ the pregnant Mex chick? They better employ someone else becuz this bitch lies.   Now I have to wait another day to do what I was going to do today.  She wasted my time and I am sure when I go back she is going to try to waste my money and time by saying that I have to send the phone back..thats not what Virgin says about it.

I will post the way this is handled tomorrow. Radio Shack will get complaints if its not handled correctly.  I dont have time for this I  am a homeless activist and I depend on service people to get their sh*t together and give me what I need NOT SERVE THEM AND GET THEM THE COMMISION THEY WANT.

Targets family's

You never know how deep this goes involving family..as you never know exactly what they have been involved in or involved you in over the years.

So many of us have family in on these activities, from being perps to enabling perps to those of us with programming or mind control backrounds where the whole family is in denial to survive and mutliple persons may be either programmed or at least compartmentalizing events or the reality of what has gone on in the family.  If you are a 'runner' or someone who sees the truth or wont accept you place in the pecking order (like scapegoat for instance) then you are a severe threat to this kind of family.. think of this family as a business which is true in more ways than one sometimes. You are a security threat. These are the sorts of people who will never want to let the victim go or ever admit to what they have done or what the family is really about.  And you may have to pay for your honestly with your life.  Especially if they have done the presto chango psuedo reform thing where they place certain people in pedastals so as to redeem the family as they continue to pick on others still. These kinds of families are typically disfunctional and they need victims.. becuz they dont know how else to function.  Usually if there is a sexual perpetrator present, each family member will be acting out their own version of abuse, even if sex acts are not used as abuse, the intensity of energy is the same. This is why they call it 'intergenerational' abuse that is 'evil' (negative) in nature. It is the simple transference of energy from one member to the other.
My mother abused me with the same connections to sexuality that her father did to her, except without the sexual acts.  These families are extremely valuable to the slave/programming systems becuz of the energy that is so negative that is holding its members captive.  Sadly, often you will experience that these families have potential to be powerful healers and psychics..but that use of the energy is certainly not encouraged.  There is a feeling that the whole family is kept down in one way or another.

This is also why family members turning on one another is encouraged..who gains control? The outside system or handlers within the family-either members or people who marry into the family, who strangely resemble perps, seem to know alot about the family they shouldnt and also act as handlers by encouraging denial and keeping members down, abused or causing strife in the family.

The family itself is never allowed to heal. There must always be betrayal, hurt, abuse,  slavery, mocking, favoritism, neglect and most importantly denial. Individual respect is unknown in these families, nor is personal responsibility. A mocking of personal responsibility is often put forward in the form of scapegoating certain members while the members holding these people responsible or always claiming they are not good enough are playing the bully roles to the hilt.
The problem is often that the bully members abuse is so severe that they are compartmentalized and non self actualizing and/or them facing thier own abuse issues is impossible.  Often this is encouraged by the parents usually one of the original perpetrators who plays handler and keeps everyone down.

There is the marketing of failure as normal. Everything is always negative and very controlling.

My only advantage was having some DNA my single parent couldnt figure out, as well as my parent being so abusive it adds up to murder basically. I was left with little choice but to fight for my life in the end.  This should not have happened, especially since family members seemed to have knowledge of  the set up and gang stalking activities.  Inexcusable.
What do you expect from people who arent willing to die to fight oppression or are happy to live enslaved?   These types usually want a victim to suffer for them instead. And that someone is YOU, TI.

Often there is a scape goat scene just like in the bible..everyone feels that if they burden guilt, shame and negative energy onto the TI then itll make it better for everyone else. 
The bible is not a logical book and this aint the desert.  This is reality where debts must be paid by perpetrators  not sacrifices. 

They want to suck you in usually in this mind control cult fashion to believe that scapegoating someone to thier death or insanity is 'the way it is' or some b*llshit.   They are a collection of idiots and you should not serve them.

Usually families like this are very manipulative and controlling to the point of suffocating people to their deaths. Those deaths may be suicides or losing ones mind.

In my family there seems to be hatred for me on both sides. Jealousy abounds and the betrayals I have experienced would amaze you.  My parent is akin to a possesive stalker who everntually kills thier victim.
This person has an amazingly sadistic and sick sense of humor and often has found my harsh circumstances amusing.  This person has the elements of a true dominant as well as seeming to fit what would be hailed as satanic.  Its no wonder so many people are in on targeting TI's.  There is possibly an admiration for the perpetrators in the family by the system who see them as powerful. Its admirable by many people to kill your own child or to torture.  And in my case there is an element of sexualness involved to onlookers that they possibley find exciting as it is female on female violence.  Often the kinds of people perps are will get off an a woman abusing her own daughter..men find this exciting in some way.  Unfortunatley, these types will admire the female who is strongest. 
It may also be a way for  a female being tortured to feel she is going to be let loose from torture herself by 'pleasing' they system of perps. 
Also, one of my other non family members who is in on this most likely is a powerful female, admired by many for being a near murderous bitch. Sick men will fall right into this as if it were a cat fight for them to watch.  They are men and this is one of thier weaknesses.
Also, in mc families someone is possibley connected in some way. 

There is so much cruelty from people who you dont even know, as if its normal, its got to come from some extrememely sinister source.  Your family is the core of this source, if they wanted to they could protect you but they have chosen not to. Why? what are they paying for? What do they not want exposed?  Why is the TI so damn expendable? 

Often in pedophle families there is extreme addictions to power, as you have noticed with pedophiles themselves.  This is the main motivator perhaps for them to destroy other family members.  Its called identifying with the aggressor.

I have heard TI's tell me that thier families believe them and other say they dont. Some say they suspect that they are in on it and some say out right that they are.

When it all goes down you are going to have to look at your family as part of  the gang stalking system, especially if they are overt about taking part and betraying you.
Then if you make it to some safety, once you realize you are a TI you are going to have to re evaluate a lifetimes worth of interaction with these people and realize that yes, they are victims but they are also dangerous to you perhaps always have been. 

You may have to abandon them, to never see them again becuz you have to start thinking of your OWN security.  I personally would have died if I stayed with my family as the abuse is so bad I always ended up on drugs, as most members did.  Also, as I was targeted and they seemed to know about it, a family member screamed at me one day " I WILL NOT BE CONDEMNED BY YOU" as I was starting to recall things from before the age of 6 and truly starting to see them for what they were. Also,  when I told this family member about the harassment, they said that it was probably part of the federal investigation of friends of friends and  it would cease once it was found I knew nothing.  Then for some reason, this member turned on me, got me alone in a car and asked if maybe I thought I was crazy like my father. However she denied this hours later in front of another family member.  Then this person went off in this direction, trying to convince other family members that I was mentally ill.  However, the same people throughout seemed to know alot about the harassment but wouldnt tell me directly. They said things like " Dont go into Brookline and Cambridge as itll be a war back and forth" and warning me never to tell my personal stories in meetings (NA) and "Thats your business".  Also one of my family members was amused by all this and was cooing I was 'very creative' and then stated that 'they' were afraid of me. 

I do not appreciate this witholding of information as it is the continued gaslighting of me by family as has always been the case.  Becuz they have lawyers and they had info that might have made my situation turn out favorable but chose to withold resources as well as info, along with thier very suspect treatment of me in the past  I will can never deal with them again.  
I am highly suspect due to being warned about certain family members by perps (!) who claim they are sick and that my families treatment of me is 'infamous'.  Within the gang stalking system I assume (which also makes me aware that this has indeed been ongoing for years as I suspected.)

My case is confusing as there seemed to be warring factions, like a few different groups of people trying to get rid of me for different reasons.   My family may have wanted to be helpful but since they are so comprimised I dont think that was even possible.   I sometimes suspect that they may be helping somehow with protection to keep me alive but there is so much a TI does not know. And the perps want you to think its everyone other than who really gave the orders.

So you have to size up your family according to the same way you would anyone else..if you want to live or stay out of being labeled.  Emotionally strangers can only do so much to you, blood relatives have keys to your insides that allow them the kind of access that can destroy if they are not responsible.

THis is insightful I find becuz it explains why the perps must gain intel on a TI that is ultimately intimate.

THere fore the gang stalking system can abuse you with info that makes it so they know you or everything about you.  Now, they want to appear to have 'keys' as well..always remember that they are copies.  You are dealing with people who dont know you, wish or think they do, and often the True key is that fact that they are of different DNA than you..they dont readily know how you think but they think they do.

THe beauty of the info war era we live in is that people quickly gather info and believe that alone will destroy.

A true artist knows better. Its the quality and no one but true intimates can hurt you.
THis  is also why intimates must betray you...and it has to be made to appear that the gang stalking system is stepping in for them or on thier behalf...you lose touch with who was truly real to you and these positions are taken up by the gang stalking system and its players.
If you think about the gang stalking system its all very technological and strategic.  Like the behaviors of computers or diseases.

But its all illusion.  The people that sold you out most likely know what they did, will never admit to it or its benefits, and are being or have been advised readily never to do so.  Use this angle to your advantage-you'll know how.

You may have to get rid of your family as they have found it convenient to sell you out and betray you as well. If they are helping to torture you in anyway or denying that the system is real and you are being harassed you may have to just dump them.  For your own protection it may be necessary but that is up to you as a target, how valuable are they in the fight against the enemy?  Will they be allies or in the way or inadvertently help the advesary. 

Forced suicide is not a good option and your family will do what I have seen before which is at your funeral, stand there like they actually give a shit and say things like " At least so and so is not suffering now"..I will never be that assh*le in that coffin. The ultimate and final victim.

Screw families and every other intimate unless they are going to assist in the battle.