One of the things that Targeted persons lack is a support system. A TI from Australia just sent me a much needed donation. It saved my ass as living outside has brought about some difficulties..that and a few bills put me at zero for the rest of the month. You cant panhandle in San Diego either.
Get a Job? OK sounds easy. Uh, what do I do with the severe PTSD or the conditioning to have to watch out for attacks from total strangers in public? Having to become 'trained' in this as well as keep up a front (lead a double life every day basically) to pretend that is NOT what one is doing every moment is quite hard. Sometimes there are slips in this new formed system as well as if something is too stressful or triggering now the TI snaps over what seems nothing to others around them..or even reacting to a real life encounter with a perpetrator. What if THAT is not handled properly or the numbers, the other factors around us at the time of attack are as such as to cause a chain reaction somehow? One wrong factor in such a situation and the TI falls from grace in handling such a situation stealthfully..then we look nuts or at least seem edgy or the ever useful-to-society to explain away real problems: 'difficult'.
I personally do NOT want to subject myself to such stress. The only job where I wont get harassed is art modeling becuz any harassing behavior is socially unacceptable and if the model feels uncomfortable she has power to say so and actually has alot of power over the environment. Its a very limited relationship between model and artists and this creates such a filter as to make it a safe bet against pychological warfare.
Dont think perps cant still be present or pull tactics.
-a penny left strategically in a dressing room
-perps as guests in a drawing class either trying to gain control of a (especially female TI) by digging for information or other (and this will always register as grossly inappropriate within the context of art modelling where it is considered vulgar to ask the model too many personal questions as the model is supposed to posess mystique).
-people who come to pick up drawing guests who persuade the guest to get info from the model in a very familiar perp like manner also under the guise of being worried about the TI.
-an entire drawing group being in someones home when you realize most of them cant draw and its obviously bogus.
(All occured in St Louis or surrounding suburbs by the way)
As for Boston I wont even get into how abusive the art teachers have been to me in the schools or a drawing class in Central Square but hey, such is snobs from that city and 'THAT crowd'. They will get a speical 'up yours' in my exposes.
So a job must be selected carefully and then one must figure on future rejection when the employer is either informed or gives way to pressure from outside or internal forces.
Actually I would have loved to have been a councilor by now, doing some side activism and art projects for a balanced life. I should have been at the height of my power and the top of my game...and not by fighting this system and perhaps acing it or whatever level I am at now in the war but by having something to show for my efforts. To be upwardly mobile in this society as I am supposed to be able to be.
Not THIS bullshit I live every day.
All donations are appreciated by anyone and everyone who has contributed at any time.
Thank You again.
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