Its day to day in the cold. My lover still in jail though lawyer is assisting him now and working with other lawyers.
My companion is back and without him surviving in this weather outside would be impossible. We are friends now but now as easy to deal with each other as last year.
Ive never spent a February out here. The latest Ive left for someplace warmer is start of January. Lots of nights inside if I can get them.
The remote influence here is as usual harsh during the weak with the same pattern of being somewhat clearer on Sat day and then horrid on Sat night, then Sunday is clear. Never as clear as federal holidays which are the most return to normal experienced at any time.
There seems to be alot of weird experiences on the buses. This time its not so much overt stalking and harassment of me directly but more like...what seems to be set ups. Violence around me or towards me is always the theme. I think its either to desensitize me, discredit me, wear me down or perhaps help train me to handle violent situations. WTF is this system up to?
As usual I respond with remaining in control and acting with thought but my mouth is usually spewing the kind of stuff thats going to discredit me. Remember everything is now recorded and watched by the cameras on the buses. What are they up to why are they so determined to have such things happen on buses and trains (moreso buses).
Years ago, I recall I posted on here (with video) an example of being mobbed on an MBTA bus where the driver would start an altercation with me then there would be a group of passengers who would mob me. After posting this with an explaination of sequence of events it ended up not happening like that again. Ever. That sort of mobbing stopped.
Now its single instances of violence either towards me or around me. There are people from Central Sq shelters, public housing or Central Sq regulars involved and even a woman from a local women's drop in who was caught by another guest at that drop in recording an argument between guests with her cell phone. She then didnt show up as frequently as before that incident. And she got into housing pretty fast I might add...from sleeping in her car.
Tonight on the bus there was an incident as just a few days ago. It might just be the effects of the long winter here along with the general attitude of this area that violent outbursts or interactions are normal daily occurrences.
The system is tryiung hard now to totally discredit me and distract me daily from going forward with my goals in relation to this project and any legal actions I might be able to take for individual incidents as they occur. With trying to constantly discredit me of course. And drive me nuts in the process.
Its also due to the effects of this area being so much worse than other areas and I am usually a long ways away from MA or the northeast this time of year. Its very oppressive here right now and has been for the past few months. The only real relief from tech is when it snows heavily. Its wonderful.
I can feel the lifting of the oppressive effects of whatever this influence is in the city at its core (Boston and Cambridge) when I go out on the train further and further outside these areas.
Tomorrow it will be back to the zombie like state in this location from Mon-Fri. My injuries hurt more, I have less energy- I forget things.
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