MICROSOFT TRANSLATOR

Disclaimers

Please be advised that this written work of mine is only THEORY. It's theorizing, pondering and amateur research. I have no belief in anything posted here because if I did I would have had legal action taken by now-until that occurs this blog can only be considered theorizing.

Also it's obviously not clear enough to readers that I've put up a disclaimer for years that says I'm often sleep deprived when posting due to my lifestyle as a houseless Traveler (and my age as well as health issues). This should be taken into consideration when viewing my posts.

Friday, February 19, 2010

A piece on suicide on Anti-Psychiatry

http://www.antipsychiatry.org/suicide.htm

Its so hard to hold on..but I know I promised I wud write my story first. I will not leave this planet or this plane without telling you all about my life and what the system has done to me to alter my life. I so desperately need to leave that behind, just to know something remains.

I have to be honest and say that its obvious to me that this is the military behind this..if there is intelligence agency involvement they are either in co operation or have some sort of sector that has some pretty expensive toys. If this is true we now live in a psycho civilized reality where the military does what it wants and there seems no escape.

I know becuz of many of the reactions that I got from soldiers along the way. Not always Army but occasionally someone would come by me and the vibe was that they were terrified to death of what was being done to me. They looked scared shitless. Perhaps this is part of psychological warfare I dont know. Also I recall many times saying something and a reaction could be felt that was clearly someone doing thier job and not feeling too great about it. Perhaps that too is part of the psych warfare tactics. Once I was alone and was cleaning this floor in an apartment in the hostel lot in St Louis MO. I said "I wish I had a toothbrush cuz I would clean this military style" as my grandmother was in the Marines and taught spring cleaning in this manner. The second that came out of my mouth I felt this reaction from...someone. That is the most creepy part of all this, often one feels watched but its not by anything conventional. Its like a presence..there is nefinately someone on 'the other end' and its very close and intimate but there is no one else there. And one can feel the reactions of the other person on 'the other end'. Its like possesion or something but there is still a feel of technology being involved. There is definatelyh another person involved as I WOULD NOT HAVE HAD THAT KIND OF EMOTIONAL REACTION and also I was ALREADY EXPRESSING AN EMOTIONAL REACTION. One of missing my family's way of cleaning. The second reaction was from another person, a living human being and it was a male. It was someone who had a burst of emotion for a second, one of sympathy and simpatico as I out of nowhere expressed a connection to the military.

I have to also be honest...I have been investigating this whole subject matter since I was 18 not just after getting gang stalked. I just..got side tracked and forgot about it. I now see that the system or part of it has done everything in its power to sidetrack me. To get me into drugs or into other diversions.

There are crazier theories other than the ones we as TIs put forward. The things I put forth are difficult to map out but there is evidence or documentation. Its just surpressed with alot of work by the disinfo people.

There is something I dont talk about often though. It has only occured a few times. Its as if...what may be occuring is messing with time and space itself. Its very possible that experimentatoin with time has occured. It may be an extension of many cultures experimentation. The Nazi connection must be kept to what is documented but to be honest I havent really looked into it as much of what was around in the old days in books is not on the internet now. There were many books saying that one of the Nazi oddities was to sleep with magnets around thier bed frames. This would make sense against electro magnetics. I cant even find that on the internet now.

What I recall is the first books that got my attention in a library in Littleton MA. Jamea Watt's Critical Mass and The Philadelphia experiement. The latter is one of the staples of how far experimentation went without the public knowing about it. The alleged scene where a soldier gets caught in the ship when it was sent through time and he is fused with it half of his body showing only. The other book was perhingaps more horrifying as it was James Watt from the Dept of Energy proposing ships powered by I forget something noxious, that looked very much like what UFO sightings amount to. His proposals were refused due to concerns for the environment and cost. I always wondered if it was went ahead with anyway and they just cover thier asses with UFO or ET sightings.

I also have to say that my dreams have been interferrecd with for many years outside of recently but never so overtly, so constantly nor with so much gang stalking that was so overt or like blanket bombing.

I can tell the difference between what came from the trauma of my life inwardly and what was introduced from the outside. Much of interference happened when I was younger during the time I lived in Littleton which supposedly had some military influence near by...all I know is that whole area is a creepy little place and I cannot tell you the cause.

I feel at times that there are military personell that would like this book written not for an expose of my life but to reveal the abuses that occured especially during Bush. I also feel them to be far off...sometimes a portion of them either dead or..in some other time frame is the only way to describe it.

There is a faction of people, very much alive here on earth who do indeed gang stalk targeted persons and seem to take part in human experimentation without any human emotions like humanity or sympathy. This is the faction that confuses the TI the most. Never before has a civilian seen something so heartless especially without a declaration of war. Perhaps we were all supposed to take the war under Bush or the war on terror as an official declaration or an inferred one on the domestic population.

I have personally seen an older couple watching me in Kenmore Sq one recent summer standing near enough for me to catch what they are saying- "I dont think she can take it today" and they were right in that observation. But why should I have to take it on any given day? And why do they stop so if a target looks to damaged on that day to take anymore? Its like they want you fighting and healthy..in shape to be tortured. On any day that you dont look like you'll give off energy if tortured they will refrain from doing so. But how would you like to have people victimizing you to THAT extent or acting as if they owned your whole life as such? This is what makes the TIs life so hopeless is this kind of inhuman treatment...and no one believes you due to this supposedly being a free country.

As you can see there is more than just my selfishishness and vengence involved in why that book must be realized.
But the daily torture here in San Diego is insidious. Its subtle. Its like a fish bowl here, one feels very trapped into the city. Its a place of limitations. Its not Boston which has ones brain working over time and pleasantly so every day. This is the most pleasant UNpleasant place I have ever lived in. Part of it is my being accustomed to the snow and the dark which my body seems to miss if not something in my genes. I feel like a big lumox with nothing to fight through without the winter snow here. Upon it getting too hot and sunny I feel depressed. Having one's spirit reduced via torture like I have one is reduced to one's primitive state if not dependent on the very physical due to a lack of emotion or life or life energy.

Its become harder here than on the road and I cant pin down exactly why.

I promise that book will get finished before anything happens to me of my own hand. The system doesnt make any sense. Its alot of torture but when I start to take serious action it seems to cease and dissist. Its obvious to me its deprogramming just like in the old days but one isnt locked in a basement somewhere. But its the same- rape, abuse, isolation..an attempt to break down the person.

I believe its true what the piece says that most Americans dont truly believe in freedom of speech and individual rights. Its true.

3 comments:

Medawar said...

It doesn't look as if whoever is tormenting "gangstalking Australia" is concerned about whether or not she can stand it, and Medawar fears she may have bought it.

Hopefully, this isn't the case, but she seems to have been subjected to a lot of tricks that Medawar recognizes, except much stronger doses and utterly relentless over the past couple of months, although she claims about 23 years talking before that.

Perhaps there is a point where they go for broke.

Changing the structure of time is an interesting one. Under the currently-fashionable "multiverse" theory, everything that can happen, has happened in one universe or another anyway, so in a way changes make no difference.

If this isn't true, or is true but not the whole story, then not only is an unknown technology in play, but also a different understanding of the universe.

It is very noticeable that there's a whole generation who only believe what they can find on the net, and are incredulous and contemptuous if your source is a book. They even have (Hebrew or Yiddish) swear words to describe non-internet knowledge.

The internet could hold everything ever written and everything mankind knows, but it doesn't.

Medawar said...

If those behind this THINK they are changing the structure of time (all that's needed for them to do what they do: it doesn't have to actually be a physical possibility!) then might that at least partially explain the stalking of native American community leaders, as well as native Australian ones? Both nations are credited with alternative insights into the nature of time.

Or could it be something more prosaic, such as native American's being the only serious rival to the Mob's monopoly of casino licences in the USA?

Medawar said...

Here we go: an actual book, about which there is a Wiki article.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_End_of_Eternity

However, the short story was a bit different, and it's that that Medawar remembered: the time agent is sent to kill the inventor of a gravity drive that offers humankind so much scope for advancement, expansion and adventure that not only are the time-meddlers never formed, the whole mentality of humanity changes to reject that sort of thing.

The theme, that the time meddlers end up completely eliminating human progress in order to ensure that they exist themselves, is the same.

Isaac Asimov was a professor of bio-chemistry (and a good one) and his science fiction is generally about the moral and ethical issues surrounding scientific discoveries.

So, without commenting on whether time travel and time-meddling are even possible, Medawar's conclusion, like Asimov's, is that if they were, to do so would be utterly wrong. Anyone cooperating with a conspiracy to harass, brainwash and perhaps even murder, people in order to produce a particular future outcome to human history, is doing the worst thing it is possible for them to do.

There was also a very, very early "Dr Who" story: "The Time Meddler" which guest starred Peter Butterworth as a rogue Time Lord, much less malevolent than "The Master", who has decided that King Harold, of England, being the protege of Edward the Confessor, had the potential to be one of the greatest kings in human history. (By no means an unreasonable or unattractive idea.) The Meddler sets out to help Harold, by destroying (with an atomic cannon) the Danish invasion fleet that landed in Yorkshire, a few days before the Norman Conquest in Kent.

If Harold's men are spared their first battle and have an extra day to march from Yorkshire to Kent, they should have no trouble defeating the Norman invasion that was timed (apparently by the Vatican, but that's not in the Dr Who story) to coincide with the Danish one and guarantee Harold's defeat. As it turned out, of course, Harold came incredibly close to pulling it off and the Normans only just survived the opening stages of the battle of Hastings.

The Time Meddler is thwarted by the Doctor, and his Tardis is sabotaged so it becomes too small for the Meddler to re-enter it. He is left trapped in 11th Century Yorkshire.

Two points: Dr Who is trying to make a point that changing time is wrong, no matter how attractive it looks. (Ironic, as he then spent the next thirty years interfering with history every Saturday tea time).

Secondly, one has to wonder whether there was an element of "Time Meddling" in the arrival of two invasions, by different countries, on English shores with five days of each other. Given the communications of the time, this was near simultaneous.

Meddling with time is the ultimate imprisonment of the human race within one person's concept of possibility.

Medawar hopes this is physically impossible.