Over the last year my health has been deteriorating for different reasons.
Now it seems with this new mayor and I just learned police chief in Boston as well as a new city manager in Cambridge being houseless and outside here is turning close to deadly.
Slowly I am degenerating. The hard part is that the gang stalking has turned constant but subtle and it seems effects me more deeply- I cant block its effects anymore.
Locally people are still ignorant and convinced that somehow I deserve this or they just dont care or are too cowardly to think any differently.
Being outside the same effects that occurred in Ocean Beach in SoCal and other areas effected by Fukashima as well as air pollution (San Diego is pretty bad from pollution from Mexico). After one is asleep for some hours, you feel you have to urinate in the middle of the night urgently. Your entire body feels dried out and drained of hydration.
This is a new effect in this area. It does not occur when sleeping inside and it specifically occurs during more precipitation like snow or rain.
I was going to go to NM but circumstances kept stopping me. I read yesterday that there was a nuclear waste storage site that had an accident in Carlsbad, NM where there is danger from contaminates getting into the air.
So I cant go to the sw anymore as well as the west coast.
Staying here all year has made my health much worse. I cant seem to get out of here for even a month.
Whatever I am getting hit with outside and in public spaces is making me degenerate mentally or seem so in public. Its very discrediting. I am also isolated now due to my friend going away to jail as well as my former traveling companion acquiring a new girlfriend which has made him turn very selfish and mean due to her being a totally selfish drama queen who's 21 years old. Obviously she has been influencing him as thats they way he is.
I lent her my friend whos in jail's backpack becuz she after coming down from Vermont to be with him she had nothing. I should not have done this as she has mites which like some other people dont seem to effect her but when you are sensitive and allergic you can feel them crawling all over you and they itch. My advocate at a drop in saw my skin and its real not imagined.
I asked them to return it after we had a fight due to her being impossible when I was helping them move storage.
I specifically asked them to put it into a plastic bag to contain the mites. He left it in my storage not in a bag and put it into a box of clothes I dont wear right now.
Its gotten into my stuff and now I am infested with mites, miserable, itching.
I have a cold now due to not wanting to ruin my zero degree bag with mites as I cant wash it only dry clean and dont know if that will destroy the mites.
I did not watch out for my best interests in this situation partially due to my being tired and unable to think straight due to the degenerative effects of this environment listed above recently. Also whatever I am targeted with makes me docile and too kind and unable to be selfish. Its just like A Clock Work Orange except this is being used on dissidents and victim witnesses not actual violent criminals.
The mite situation has almost broken me mentally in addition to everything else. It makes me want to give up as I cant get rid of whatever it is becuz of my allergies I cant take chemical cures for clothes or skin. The environment outside and my poor health from being here all year is making it impossible to make rational decisions to problem solve anything.
I am also getting very bad advice ideations lately. Like go to Vegas. The most recent one is to go to NYC and be homeless, leaving everything here and going there looking very poorly. Part of this ideation is to take only very little AND TO TAKE MY FRIEND'S BACK PACK WHICH WAS INFESTED WITH MITES instead of my back pack as I am given the idea that that would be stolen from me in ny.
NY is dangerous and I've heard the homeless shelters are terrible. Me having trouble with African Americans I cant understand why I would want to go to such a location. The new mayor has an African American wife who was tormented here in MA when her family lived in nice, affluent white areas and she also attended Wellselly college, a place that produces people Ive met and not been too fond of in the past. So the mayors wife has a past of being bullied for being black?? WHY would I want to go to NYC seriously???
Whatever I got that made me not feel well in Oregon is still at work in my body. Its been part of my slow degeneration over time here now. And whatever happened there, whatever it is, it seems to be effecting my mind as if its some sort of infection thats gotten into the brain or is in the body effecting the brain.
Its difficult as I cant take anti biotics easily as I am allergic to many. I feel cut off from everything and everyone and cant seem to access my health care as I used to.
Note that I dont write in this blog as I used to. I cant do anything anymore.
The Harvard Sq Homeless Shelter is now its a lottery at night which means I havent been able to get in as often and this has lead to this degeneration of health also sanity as I lose sleep and am worried due to being alone with no sleep mate and have to depend on whoever is outside in whatever space I am in usually one where gang stalking operations can occur becuz I am visible in Harvard Sq. Saturday night was just horrible as there seemed to be a major gang stalking operation and I got to bed at 3 am becuz of it and had to get up at 7.
The area has been destroyed as far as being any sort of homeless scene. My new homes I created over the years from being on the road, like Cali, the southwest and Harvard Sq have been destroyed or taken from me by circumstances like Fukishima or these areas getting rid of the homeless scenes that were homes to so many of us.
This has definitely been a large part of my sanity degenerating. My homes and family have been taken away just as occured the first time around in 2003 when this campaign began.
It seems like its imperitive for the system to make sure I cant leave the country or even this state. As well as to completely destroy me this time.