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Blog DISCLAIMERS

2026 UPDATE ON VIDEOS:
PLEASE BE AWARE THAT AS OF 2026 I HAVE TAKEN DOWN ALL VIDEOS THAT SHOW MY FACE. THIS IS DUE TO ADVANCING TECHNOLOGIES IN OUR WORLD BUT IT IS ALSO DUE TO MY GROWING RESPONSIBILITY TO AGING RELATIVES AND MY DESIRE TO PRODUCE MEANINGFUL WORK THAT WILL SECURE MY FUTURE FOR THEM AND MYSELF. KEEP IN MIND THAT THIS BLOG WAS STARTED IN A DIFFERENT ERA WHERE BEING A CONSPIRACY THEORIST WAS SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE. For many years there were a few attempts to discredit the targeted individual community, such as infrequent, lone articles published by unsavory newspapers. However this was always met with resistance as well as a continued desire from many powerful factions such as academia to keep our community in a gray area. This is most likely due to the fact that back in those days academia had not been infiltrated or influenced by things like students being indoctrinated and then being used as armies against adults and institutions as well as other sordid things like the Jeffrey Epstein scandal. Educated and powerful people knew damn well that this situation is completely feasible. That level of society understood that we are victims of torture especially being aware of the exact nature of abuse of power opposed to the general public's vague impressions that they barely sense that they're being oppressed by in their daily lives anyway. Especially if it's connected to human experimentation or the theory that MK ultra is being continued under private contractors all these years academia and the powerful of all people would understand the levity of the situation. PEOPLE COULD NOT BE CANCELED AND DISSIDENT VOICES COULD NOT BE SILENCED SO EASILY. SOMEONE EXPRESSING A VERY ALTERNATIVE OPINION WOULD NOT IMMEDIATELY BE A POTENTIAL THREAT OR A DANGER TO OTHERS DUE TO CONTENT. SINCE THIS BLOG WAS STARTED, CONSPIRACY THEORY CULTURE HAS BEEN VILLANIZED AND WORSE CO-OPTED (EVEN THOUGH IT SEEMS THAT THE LEFT AND THE RIGHT POLITICAL PARTIES BELIEVE NOTHING BUT CONSPIRACY THEORIES AND THERE'S NO COMMON SENSE OR REAL POLITICS GOING ON). THERE'S SO MUCH CONSPIRACY THEORY GOING ON WITHIN POLITICS THE PROBLEM IS IS THAT ANYBODY THAT'S A REAL CONSPIRACY THEORIST THAT'S LOOKING FOR REAL ANSWERS OR THE TRUTH IS NOW BEING LABELED A PROBLEM BECAUSE SOMEHOW CONSPIRACY THEORIES ARE ONLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE AS LONG AS THEY FIT IN WITH...POLITICAL POLARIZATION?
 IT'S JUST A DANGEROUS TIME. I WILL ALWAYS PRODUCE WORK ON THIS BLOG UNTIL I AM INCAPABLE OF DOING SO OR UNTIL MY BOOK IS WRITTEN.  SINCE I WAS FRAMED IN 2016 IT TOTALLY OBLITERATED MY AUDIENCE BASE. I HAVE TO WORK REALLY HARD TO GET THIS THING BACK. MY PERSONAL LIFE HAS BEEN INTERFERING FOR THE PAST 10 YEARS AND THAT IS ENDING NOW.. HOPEFULLY I CAN MAKE THIS BLOG WHAT I ORIGINALLY INTENDED IT TO BE AS WELL AS I CAN FINALLY COMPLETE WHAT I STARTED DECADES AGO AS A WOMAN IN MY THIRTIES. NOW IN MY '50S I WOULD LIKE TO COMPLETE THIS AND MOVE ON. 
 
DISCLAIMER: 
Please be advised that this written work is theory. For legal reasons I state that I have no actual belief in these theories as fact, if I did I would have sought legal recourse. Until that occurs, this blog can only be considered theory. In future if legal recourse is made available then any and all actions PAST AND FUTURE that have been taken against me during the years producing this work will be labeled criminal action.
I am a writer, an activist and artist. I claim my RIGHT TO EXIST legally under US Constitution and international law.

This is an educational blog for awareness as well as sometimes a telling of candid personal experiences to demonstrate theories as they might be experienced by a person who theoretically is existing under such conditions.
Any actions taken against me by others questioning my competence based on this produced work even those allegedly working for me or on any legal cases on my behalf will be sued or charged with activist/dissident intimidation and/or whistle blower retaliation and proper legal action will be taken against you by myself, family and support system. 

Be warned that no further interference with my production of meaningful work as an artist and activist will be tolerated.

Sunday, August 30, 2009

PTSD, memory and opiates

http://brainzaps.wordpress.com/ptsd-symptmology-brain-changes-etc/

I believe I have posted this before about PTSD and opiates.

That I read an article (which I will find again believe me) and from experience just a small amount of certain opiates used medicinally can heal or make PTSD somehow 'better'.
And I am talking about a very small amount. Minuscule compared to what they would give you in a hospital setting for pain (and I am talking pharma quality).

I discover this every time that I am given an opiate by a physician.

I had not had anything lately that warranted me getting opiates and sure enough my memory has been fading and so have I. Constant torture from memories...its so sad becuz I was healed so much when they came after me.
And I felt I had found ways to heal myself more so even.

In cases like mine the point of gang stalking is to erase memory further, make the person depressed and fearful of doing anything or expressing themselves,(furthering all efforts at behavior modification) and make hyper vigilance so constant that nothing in life seems enjoyable- eventual suicide.

People who are trauma based mind control survivors from childhood already have PTSD..anyone with PTSD already is going to be a prime target for the perps becuz the torture system is already in place. The gang stalking system adds new and awful memories to someone who is already damaged and most likely has been or will be seeking healing at some point.

This is how lives are ruined ..internally.  And like a soldier most victims feel there is something about their story that the general public cannot understand nor would want to hear.  

Think of TI's..most of us keep our stories and situations quiet around most people we deal with..its too dangerous as most people are not familiar with such levels of corruption being 'real' (unless they are in law enforcement or crime).

Opiates seem to calm the system and make things not such a threat.
I can tell you that the effect on me now is very different from when I was younger and not damaged strictly from gang stalking..alot of the damage then was internal from childhood.

The price I pay today is a lung infection that got me put on cough medicine immediately..its worth it. I had forgotten how much this drug repairs the damage.

THIS IS THE REAL REASON FOR MAKING THE TI OUT TO BE A 'DRUG SEEKER' EVEN WHEN THE PERSON IS TRULY IN NEED OF PAIN MEDICATION. The Target must be kept in a constant state of terror.

I could not figure out in the beginning(2004)  why it was so important to make me out to be drug seeking, threatening my doctor in the hallway and such when all I had come in for was a cold or something. I really thought it was something in connection to my ex and his really stupid and clumsy rich kid friends trying to frame me in relation to thier drug busts (I was told in not so many words that they attempted just that and that they are "stupid")

..but when such behavior by medical professionals follows one across the country..uh something is wrong.

Also being treated cruelly continued consistently.

A person with so many memories of torture becomes overwhelmed and it seems impossible to get help..especially if they tried to get help at a key point in thier lives and THAT is when the system came after them the hardest.

This being overwhelmed makes the person keep entertaining suicide as the only answer, that or throwing thier lives away or worse...

in the case of a TI one of the 'alternatives' is to give in to behavior modification...a fate certainly worse than death.

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