daddy's castle

In Radio Shack near B.U. this morning. Had to get some things. Of course the tall skinny Nordic/WASPy kid who I guess manages the place had to attend, as if the African American gentleman couldnt handle me. Have I ever been a thief or robbed anyone? I would loove to know more about my own smear campaign..i have been made out to be a monster.

Moreso its what my friends say when they make fun of these idiots involved. They tell me that I am 'from the street ' so I am suspect to begin with. And they have made hysterical commemtary about how these kids hate me becuz just the way I am threatens 'daddy's castle'...then these rich kids get old enough and they realize "its their castle to protect."

Actually, from what I know its these kids parents who are the big time real criminals in this country--who do they think they are fooling? How much longer do you think you can use people like me as diversion?


Was in Lexington, MA last nite. Hotel aquired cheaply. Got hit hard, tired today. Some weird dream activity, but mostly more behavior modification. High anxiety, visions of me in cubicle job while being told repeatedly to 'keep your head down'...i saw myself more and more subjegated. There was a high pitched sound with buzzing involved and a sound like a truck or engine running outside. After the engine sound left, so did the anxiety that was torurous and the horrid visions of me as a shamed ex adultress now office worker. This has been a very big theme letely..to get me to forget all that was done to me and give up and get a 'normal' job and of course conform. To become a mindless drone I assume. There is a definite use of shaming-intensely. I am heavily sexually targeted at night mostly. Last evening it was so bad suicide ideation returned heavily. I actually was so mind and personality wiped that I told a cab driver I was being gangstalked and its my policy to never talk about this with non targets. It would seem all my resistance is being broken down.
It must be a bummer for them that some of us actually can tell we are being targeted. How many idiots out there just go to the medical industrial complex and whine they need pills?
A nurse who knew actually aked me if I wanted anti depressants-so did my shrink(she almsot jumped out of her chair trying to get me to cmply)...uuhh, I have seen people who I believe are most likel;y targeted perhaps deprogramming people I do not knopw for sure, but too many people out there end up killing someon then themselves becuz of taking anti depressants...
ARROGANCE 101: YOU ARE HELPING THE A-HOLES TO TARGET ME BY NOT BEING HONEST WITH ME ABOUT WHAT IS HAPPENING TO ME AND TELLING ME WHAT YOU KNOW AND YOU WANT ME TO TAKE PSYCH MEDS FOR DEPRESSION BECUZ I AM BEING TARGETED AND GANGSTALKED....uhh, does this strike any one else as stupid? Why in the F*CK should I take drugs just becuz I am being victimized..wouldnt it make more sense to stop the victimization?
Promising, isnt it?? (or should I say PROMIS-ing..wink wink nudge nudge say-no-more!)
As I waited for a cab in Arlington center a cop sure enough rolled past me in opposite direction and then of course parks right at the cab stand and asks me if I need any help....its a CAB STAND! There is a sign that say s"No standing taxi stand"...why in the f*ck do you think I am here? These tactics are the same as before I left this region and outside of Boston they have not picked up speed. Perhaps this is thier regional style or at least the style outside metro Boston. Of course there was other activity on the same corner but its all bullshit-decoys, counterpoint- all of it.
If you think this sounds paranoid, you havent been gangstalked/psy opt for 12 years.

You have to remember the people doing this are exactly like possessive abusive partners, for any of you who know what thats like.
They want to keep tabs on you 24/7, control what you do, influence your decisions, break your will, they seem to lay off when you are really ill, like if you have a bad case of flu or something...remind you of anyone you know? Yes, every abuser you have ever known. This is why my grandmother and even my mother are so into health but not studying it andwanting to improve it. They seem to focus on illness, my mother told me once its becuz it made other family members lay off the abusivness. I , myself, have experienced this to be true among my bio-family. When you are sick you get a reprieve, a vacation from controlling tactics and abuse. It seems the 'gangstalking' system functions like I said , resembling a possesive abusers behavior. Actually there are some abusers who will abuse even or especially when you are sick.

The people doing this have a sick sense of possession over me. I can tell their mind set is that this behavior modification is some act of love on thier part...that I will be happier as a subservient female and a non artist/ non thinking person.
Perhaps I simply know too much already and they consider this to be a 'humane' alternative to death.
They are mistaken. NON LETHAL WEAPONDRY IS LETHAL OVER THE LONG TERM AND THIS INCLUDES ANY PSY OPS TO "WIN THJE HEARTS AND MINDS OF THE ENEMY"

I PROTEST THESE ACTIONS AGAINT ME AND STATE THAT CITIZENS SHOULD NOT BE SUBJETED TO BEHAIOR MODIFICSATION AS A WAY OF COVERING CRIMES AGAINST THOSE CITIZENS.

I would have prefered death a long time ago compared to the complete destruction of who I thought I was as a person and the kinowledge in my DNA given to me by my ancestors which is my birth right.
No one has the right ot interfere with who I was, who I was going to be and what I wanted out of life. I have been given options for a future that are so limited that DEATH IS PREFERABLE.

A perp in AZ long ago came up to me on the railroad tracks and basically told me outright that I was only allowed to grow very conditionally. I guess this is what he meant.
\I have tried to write and tell me story multiple times and always I am silenced and my efforts interfered with.

Hopefully , psy ops and censorship will not make it into the coming era. I read an article of this opinion from India yesterday-have no time now to link look it up if you want to.

Often blogging in a hurry--wish this could be set up more impessively thus more persuasive as I'd like. seems they always get thier way, dont they?

Beware of Stolckholm syndrome...its what gets many a target to turn to thier side..thus thier "winning hearts etc" bullshit line..this is old fashioned INTIMIDATION plain and simple.
These assholes are ruining lives and people
s minds by what they are doing to human beings.

But what is a few sacrifices to retain your way of life?

You have no idea what you are doing.

How long do you think this human sacrifice type system can continue to feed yo need?